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Living

Last summer, I had the worst panic attack of my life. I was sitting in the outdoor food court of Ponce City Market, a bougie indoor/outdoor mall combo where you can get fifty-dollar pillow shams and pour-over coffee. It was a hellishly hot day in August, we’d just walked halfway down the Beltline, and I’d worn pants instead of shorts. The heat and my insecurity over showing my legs set me on the path to my attack. My mother-in-law chose the Chinese restaurant in the food...

There we were…two lost souls in Mexico, both unknowingly searching for someone to feed each other’s soul. Well, at least that’s how it seemed, when, I, the soul-searching empath who thought she was safe from any more toxic energy vampires, saw him. Him. The guy who screamed “Damaged!” and ”Stay away!” All of his giant red flags were waving in the wind…But instead of ignoring them, I playfully danced with them, knowing I was dancing with the devil. I had gone through a hard breakup...
Making change means getting your hands dirty. Just ask Pashon Murray, the woman behind Detroit Dirt (detroitdirt.org), a non-profit that collects food and grain waste from restaurants and breweries, and manure from the Detroit Zoo, and turns it all into high-quality compost for gardens and farms. “Going to the landfill as a child, that place never made sense to me,” says Murray, whose dad worked in waste management when she was growing up in Grand Rapids, MI. Witnessing piles of garbage made an impact on...
Say the word postpartum and most people think depression. And in the U.S., the lack of support for new parents is a wholly depressing situation—employers aren’t required to provide paid parental leave, and the federal Family and Medical Leave Act only guarantees that you’ll have a job to come back to after taking 12 weeks off…unpaid. What we do have, however, is a thriving baby shower industry, which, let’s be real, champions consumerism and regressive gender ideologies. What if we took all the energy, time,...
Tessa Thompson--the actress known for her roles in Dear White People, Creed, the Thor series, and this summer’s Sorry To Bother You--came out in an interview with Net-A-Reporter, explaining that she is attracted to both men and women. Thompson came out as part of a discussion about her speculated-about relationship with Janelle Monae--the pair played a couple in the “emotion picture” for Monae’s album Dirty Computer. Monae came out as pansexual in an interview with Rolling Stone in April. “Isn’t it such a good record? I am...
On Monday,The London Times reported that the popular ride-sharing app Uber has investigated over 2,500 drivers in London for offenses including sexual assault and stalking—and apps like Uber and Lyft are notoriously dangerous for female drivers, too. The new appropriately-titled app Safr, which will be available in Boston, Orlando, and Washington, D.C. this fall, offers a better, alternative option. Safr, built with female riders and drivers in mind, uses a myriad of tactics to ensure secure rides for everyone in the car, including an emergency SOS button and...
By the end of the Victorian era, some women were beginning to recognize the advantages of marrying a little later in life, after one had gained a modicum of maturity and life experience. In fact, according to a report in the April 19, 1901 edition of the Islington Gazette, “a spinster bride of forty is becoming more and more frequent, especially in high society.” The Gazette attributes this as much to cosmetics as to changing societal norms, stating: “For some reason the look of youthful freshness...

On Friday, November 27, 2015, Robert Dear shot and killed three people and injured nine at the Colorado Springs Planned Parenthood. The following day, I did my first shift as a volunteer clinic escort at a reproductive health clinic in New York City. The timing was coincidental, but it underscored the growing unease I’d felt about our increasingly embattled reproductive rights. I didn’t know a ton about reproductive justice, and I had no experience as an organizer, activist, or policy maker. But I knew I...
Mars, the planet of action and pure, raw sexuality, will be retrograde from June 26 to August 27 of this year in the airy sign Aquarius, making this a challenging time for us all to assert ourselves in various areas of life. Hot new romances and projects may fizzle out quickly as Mars moves backwards, provoking us to handle self-defense, relationships, and anger with a lot less diplomacy than usual. Mars in Aquarius, when direct and moving at its natural pace in orbit, tends to...

This piece discusses child sexual abuse.  For years, I thought men hated me. I got condescending looks. They wouldn't flirt with me. I sensed thinly-veiled hostility. Yet I wanted one. I hated and feared them and didn't understand men, but I wanted one. I didn't get one for a very long time. I know what you're thinking. No, I'm not a lesbian. People always ask that. No, I just would like to spend time with a guy who gets me, who doesn't treat me like shit. For years,...