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Gingerbread Cookies Are All Obviously Men, According to Fox News Contributor

by Mia X. Perez

Well folks, Fox News has broadcasted yet another embarrassingly confusing approach to political sensitivity, this one so absurd, it is liable to make you laugh until your eggnog comes shooting out your nose.

Personally, I’ve never considered the importance of gender equality in the sphere of cookies, pastries, and other baked goods. In fact, I’ve never thought about food having gender at all. But Tammy Bruce, a Fox News Consultant, says it only makes sense, after being bullied into censorship for one’s whole life, that the small things become a “tipping point.” And the last straw for her is being told she ought to call gingerbread men “gingerbread people.”

Yes, you read that right! Tammy Bruce stated in a conversation with Fox News host Tucker Carlson that what tipped her over the edge is the suggestion that anyone would consider calling gingerbread men “gingerbread people,” because “obviously, they’re men.”

The Huffington Post reports that the conversation was sparked by recent events in a coffee shop on the grounds of Scottish Parliament. The coffee shop decided to start calling the cookies “gingerbread people” as part of a drive against sexism in Parliament. But for Bruce and Carlson, it is an attack on their free speech and, well, they aren’t going to stand for it!

Tucker Carlson responded to Bruce in an even more inflammatory matter: “So, maybe the lesson is that some of us shouldn’t participate in our own spiritual neutering and that we should, at every step along the way, say ‘I’m not complying with that.’

I told you it was funny. At least they gave us a new holiday game, which I encourage you to join: every time you call a gingerbread cookie a “gingerbread person” this holiday, you get one point for “spirtually neutering” those at Fox News who feel the need to gender the world – even our belovedly ambiguous gingerbread cookies.

Top Photo: Fox News

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