Shots for the Boys

by Eliza C. Thompson
As of yesterday, an advisory panel to the FDA recommended that the all-powerful government agency approve Gardasil for use in boys — good news for all, as now it’s no longer just up to us girls to protect both ourselves and our partners from HPV. But there’s still no answer to the big question: will the vaccine ever be mandatory for school attendance?

When it was just for young women, the discussion always focused on how we’d all end up sluttier since we wouldn’t have to worry about catching HPV while doing the deed (because women are obviously too dumb to know that a vaccine doesn’t eliminate the need for a condom). Now that boys are invited to the party, everybody’s talking about whether or not it’s safe. Surprise!

Of course, many people are opposed to making the vaccine mandatory for other reasons (not properly tested, too expensive, etc.), but I think we can all agree that it’s high time the FDA learned that decisions about women’s health shouldn’t be based on whether or not they think one little shot will inspire us to strip down for every guy we pass on the street. Here’s hoping the all-inclusive approval will help lawmakers focus their discussion on the vaccine’s health risks and benefits rather than its slut-making capabilities.

Side note: how many thousands of lollipops did they promise that child to make him look so happy about getting a shot?

photo courtesy cdc.gov

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