Bullies are everywhere, whether they’re on the playground as a kid, in the locker room as an adolescent, or even the person in front of you in line for Starbucks who’s giving the barista a hard time; bullies can feel completely unavoidable.
But thanks to the unSlut project we now have a plan to not only conquer bullies, but also to celebrate and spread kindness instead of hate, and it all starts with confidence! (And no it does not include baking a cake of rainbows and smiles and wishing it were middle school again).
Emily Lindin created this project after her own experience with sexual bullying in her early adolescent years and, she believes that we need to make an active effort to end bullying and slut-shaming, and to become better human beings.
I seriously recommend you watch her entire TEDtalk, but she basically breaks down her pro-confidence/anti-bullying campaign into these steps:
1) Do what you like – Find something your good at and focus on it. For me it would be writing, and learning about feminism — both of these things make me ridiculously happy and are better for my health than my double chocolate chip cupcake baking hobby.
2) Set Goals – Set long-term and short-term goals (which can be related to the former, but don’t have to be), because accomplishing little things will help you build confidence. I mean, how good does it feel checking things off a checklist?
3) Practice kindness– First learn to be kind toward yourself; don’t beat yourself up all the time — and then when you’ve got that down, you can make someone else’s day better too (start with the baristas! they’re people too).
Lindin’s basic plan stems from the idea that, with confidence comes respect and kindness for yourself and for others. When those are a part of your everyday life, hopefully you won’t feel the need to bully and you will help stop others from bullying as well.
You can buy a shirt to show your support for the project, and keep an eye out for her film “Slut: A Documentary,” as well as Emily’s published diaries from her childhood, coming out next year.
Also, feel free to read Emily’s diary entries or contribute your own slut-shaming survivor story right here.
Photo credit: UnSlut Project, Barry J Holmes
