The Media Coop recently posted an article titled “Dating Tips for the Feminist Man” that offers some amazing tips for practicing what you preach. There is a lot of repetition, but you can never discuss emotional check-ins too much!
An interesting point made in the article is that, while being a sensitive guy is awesome, there is more to being a feminist than simply not being a jerk-off. Tip number four illustrates just that:
“If you don’t know how you feel, or you’re not sure, or you have conflicting or ambiguous or confused emotions, say that. Say ‘I’m not sure what this means. Do you want to continue even if I don’t know where we’re going?’ Do not tell the other person what you think they want to hear – you do not know what they want to hear. Do not say the thing that is easy for you to say, or oversimplify in order to keep them happy (and making out with you) in the moment. This kind of fuzzy communication can end up being dishonest communication.”
This is a great point about dealing with the big, scary world of the single life. Sometimes it is not just one person at fault, but rather both people who are experiencing an array of confusing emotions all at once; usually leading to less communication.
But the thing is – it is okay to be confused. There are a lot of great examples of things you can say to better articulate your needs. Although this article is directed towards the feminist man, it would be useful for anyone who is trying to work on their communications skills. There is a lot of content, so make sure to take the time to process after.
And, in the spirit of feminist males, I have included a link to the Feminist Ryan Gosling Tumblr because it’s awesome.
Thanks to the Media Co-Op