This week on Broad City, Abbi’s gray hair takes her on a a journey of a lifetime and Ilana comes to terms.
When Ilana discovers Abbi’s gray hair:
Danielle: Have you ever had a gray hair?
Lindsay: Oh, I have a lot.
Danielle: I’ve never noticed.
Lindsay: I hide it well.
Danielle: You do.
Lindsay: Would you dye your hair when it started to turn gray?
Danielle: I don’t know. It’s definitely ageist.
Lindsay: I’d probably change it every color for fun until I get too lazy and let it grow out. Wait. Is that what happens when you get a gray hair? You turn into a witch?
Danielle: I don’t think that happens.
Lindsay: I don’t know. I’ve gotten a lot of gray hairs this year, but also learned a lot about astrology.
Danielle: That may not be how it works.
How to say acai:
Danielle: Oh that’s how you say it? A-sigheeeee.
Lindsay: I just avoid saying it to anyone.
Danielle: When I order it I just say “that bowl.”
When Abbi’s sitting at her table:
Danielle: How did she get that table there? Did she bring it on the subway? When I see people with a duffel bag on the subway, I just think they’re really brave.
Lindsay: Her table says Young Abbi! Because of one gray hair?
Danielle: Do you think that woman’s older Abbi or she’s just a witch?
Lindsay: Older Abbi
When Ilana visits the sex therapist:
Danielle: Massage? Is that what she’s doing?
Lindsay: I think she’s paying to jack off.
Danielle: Oh, she must be a sex therapist.
Lindsay: She’s making up being horny all the time!
Danielle: Why would she lie about being horny all the time? Is she insecure about coming?
Lindsay: Why doesn’t Ilana just tell Abbi? They’re best friends!
Danielle: Ilana has no filter around Abbi, I don’t understand.
Lindsay: Oh my god, she named her vulva Abbi.
When the Trump montage happens:
Danielle: Oh no, no, no.
Lindsay: This is traumatizing.
Danielle: Why is it still happening? Oh my god! They bleeped out Trump’s name!
Lindsay: I’m very uncomfortable.
When the women montage happens:
Lindsay: I could watch this at the beginning of every day.
Together: MARGE AND LISA SIMPSON!
When Jeremy stops by Abbi’s table:
Lindsay: The neighbor!
Danielle: The guy she pegged!
Lindsay: GASP.
Danielle: IS THAT HIS KID?
Lindsay: Ugh, I hate him.
Together: HIS WIFE CALLED HER ZABBI.
Lindsay: Oh my god, he called her a “struggling artist.”
Danielle: Girl, take his money.
When Abbi’s at the doctor’s office getting her face done:
Danielle: She’s sweating.
Lindsay: She looks horrible.
Danielle: Nooooooooooooooooooooooooo.
Lindsay: So much white supremacy in this doctor’s room!
When Abbi and Ilana go to the location old Abbi gave them:
Lindsay: It IS old Abbi!
Danielle: It’s gonna get weird. Do you think Hillary Clinton is going to be there? Remember when someone found her in the woods?
Lindsay: Oh, I remember that!
When Ilana is dying Abbi’s hair and find more gray hair:
Lindsay: That’s what happens. They creep up behind you, right under your hair. You have no idea it hit you.
After the episode:
Danielle: I think Ilana’s storying in this is really weak in this one.
Lindsay: But it had that amazing scene
Danielle: What scene?
Lindsay Not the traumatizing one.
Danielle: But I know sex writers who have had more sex since Trump.
Lindsay: Because you only live once.
Danielle: Right, nothing matters anymore.
Images and gifs via Comedy Central/Broad City
More from BUST
“Broad City” Recap: Season 4, Episode 5 — “Witches”
“Broad City” Recap: Season 4, Episode 4 — “Mushrooms”
“Broad City” Recap: Season 4, Episode 3 — “Just The Tips”
