John Oliver, America’s favorite news presenter, has come up with the perfect analogy for the way ethical failings tarnish a candidate’s reputation — they’re like raisins in a cookie (of course). And Oliver wants to make it very clear that, in the symbolic cookie that is Hillary Clinton’s would-be presidency, there are maybe a few raisins — but the cookie that is Donald Trump’s potential presidency (shudder) is less a cookie than a nightmarish raisin downpour.
“This campaign has been dominated by scandals, but it is dangerous to think that there is an equal number on both sides,” he says in Sunday’s episode of Last Week Tonight. “You can be irritated by some of Hillary’s, that is understandable, but you should then be fucking outraged by Trump’s. Think of it like this: ethical failings in a politician are like raisins in a cookie. They shouldn’t be there, they disgust people. But most politicians have at least a few raisins. And Hillary is a cookie like this one” — Oliver produces a perfectly regular looking oatmeal raisin cookie — “but we all need to remember that when it comes to Donald Trump, this is the amount of raisins he represents! He is a fucking raisin monsoon!” Cue the downpour.
Oliver cites Trump’s loose relationship with the truth (Politifact has found 53 percent of Trump’s statements to be false), his refusal to release his tax returns (he’s the first candidate since 1980 to do so), his seeming unwillingness to put his assets in a blind trust, and his shady use of Trump Foundation funds (in one particularly damning instance, he made a Trump Foundation payment to a potential investigator of Trump University, who later dropped the investigation) as urgent reasons to keep this man as far away from the White House as possible.
Trump’s nefarious dealings haven’t received the media scrutiny they deserve–by the media’s reckoning, Clinton is still the candidate with “the trust problem.” Thankfully we have John Oliver to set things straight. (We’ll even forgive him for the all raisins.)
Last Week Tonight With John Oliver Airs On HBO On Sunday Nights
More From BUST
Samantha Bee’s Message To Trump Following His ‘Birther’ Speech: “Oh Fuck You!”
Justin Trudeau Delivers Powerful Speech Addressing Sexism And Poverty, Proves He’s The Wokest Bae
Here’s How Hillary Clinton Can Close The “Enthusiasm Gap”
