Street Boners!

by Kelly McClure

Did you ever do that thing where you sat down with your yearbook and went through each page, marking down notes on pictures of your classmates that said stuff like, “always smells like bologna,” “has a juicy booty,” or, “ate gum from under a desk once?”  Did you ever do this? Hopefully if the answer is yes, you did this during a high school/college age, and not last week, because that’s some America’s Most Wanted crap right there. But yeah, this book that I have in my lap right now, Street Boners: 1,764 Hipster Fashion Jokes, is like doing that yearbook thing, only in this book every picture has something to do with tight jeans. 

Street Boners was put together by Gavin McInnes, who was one of the co-founders of Vice Magazine in 1994, and has since moved on to co-manning a site called StreetCarnage, which is updated daily with videos of gross things or boobs, and pictures/articles of, or about, gross things and boobs. Street Boners is a feature of the site which is more or less exactly like Vice’s Dos and Don’ts, but it rates each picture using little kitten head icons. Like if someone looks really tore up, they will get one kitten head, but if they look like a big time style model, they can get upwards of 10 kitten heads.  It seems like girls with dark hair, glasses, and big boobs, who dress in jeans and heels always get the most kittens. But then sometimes a picture of a girl in a comfy sweatshirt, paired with Converse and some old tote bag will hit pay dirt kittens, so it’s kind of, well, it mainly has to do with the boobs I think. 

ps. Someone who works in the Bust office (not naming names)  used little sticky arrows to mark each dude in the book who she’s had sexy times with, and there were quite a few arrows. Scandal! 

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Founded in 1993, BUST is the inclusive feminist lifestyle trailblazer offering a unique mix of humor, female-focused entertainment, uncensored personal stories, and candid reporting that tells the truth about women’s lives.

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