Photo via Donald Trump’s Facebook Page
1. The Donald Trump Bidet
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Tushy has launched a new campaign appropriately titled “Why Trump Is Shitty.” This campaign, designed to promote their discrete bidets, encourages customers to buy gift cards for their Trump-loving friends, basically telling them to clean up their shitty political views. tushy.me ($59)
2. The Donald Trump Wig For Dogs
Photo via Etsy
Do you have a four-legged friend you still need to find a Halloween costume for? Look no further. Lena Pava has designed special Trump wigs for your pups. Now all you need is pet-friendly orange fur coloring and you’ll have one scary mutt. Works on kittens, rodents, and lizards too. etsy.com ($16.99)
3. The Donald Trump Ashtray
Photo via Tictail
Sculptor E. Smith has designed these great terra cotta ashtrays. Each one-of a kind, you’ll get a lot of satisfaction snubbing out cigs and joins on Trump’s grimacing (butt)head. Smith is also donating 20% of every purchase to the National Network For Immigrant And Refugee Rights. Amazing. tictail.com ($35)
4. The Donald Trump Scented Candle
Make America smell great again with this hilarious candle. Stressed out? Light up this bad boy and run your fingers through the hairy lid. Made by JD And Kate Industries, this is the perfect gift to give your candle-loving friends and it’s hilarious design will keep you giggling through maddening political debates. etsy.com ($18.50)
5. Donald Trump Toilet Paper
Photo via Amazon
Clean up your dumps with this “Dump The Trump” themed roll of toilet paper. Surprise your roommates and your houseguests with this political bathroom necessity. Sometimes, actions speak louder than words. amazon.com ($7.99)
6. Donald Trump and Mike Pence 2-Pack Period Panties
Photo via Etsy
Cute Fruit Undies has come out with their own special kind of period panties. Now, in a 2-pack set, you can have your very own matching Trump/Pence panties in your favorite color. Bleed away on these woman-haters. etsy.com ($50)
7. The Donald Trump Piñata
Photo via Etsy
The perfect birthday gift for your local feminist. We’re not condoning any real physical violence but, hey, taking a bat to this piñata and getting to eat all of the candy afterward would be really, really satisfying. Who says you can’t turn Election Day into a party? etsy.com ($30)
8. “Republican Tears” Water Bottle
Photo via Etsy
BPA Free? Leak Proof? That’s exactly how I like my vessels for my lemon-infused racist old white man tears. Bring this awesome water bottles to all of your debates with ignorant Trump supporters and keep yourself hydrated as you campaign for Hilary and shut down Conservative bullshit. etsy.com ($10.99)
9. The Donald Trump Voodoo Doll
Photo via First Lady Bill
Want to stick it to Trump? Get voodoo dolls for all of the witches in your coven. Keep it in your purse, set it on fire, use your magical energy to continue hurtling this human Cheeto into more scandals and controversy. firstladybill.com ($14.99)
10. The Donald Trump Bag For Your Dog Shit
Photo via Etsy
These “smear campaign” themed bags will make picking up after your dog so much more enjoyable. Each box comes with 80 baggies so it should definitely last you until November 8th. etsy.com ($14.99)
11. The Donald Trump Butt Plug
Photo via Etsy
We can’t make this shit up. 3D printed and, perhaps, too realistic, these butt plugs might make a better shelf display than a sex toy. Either way, be prepared to shock your friends with this wild ass accessory. etsy.com ($27.99)
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