Forgive the typos in this weak’s (oops) abortion news dump, we’ve been POUNDING jager bombs celebrating the off-boarding of Kristi The Clown. Bye Beeyatch. Let the prosecutions begin…
Okay, let’s goooo. Whether you’re a long-time friend of Abortion AF or you recently met us at one of the REM tribute shows (we loved your outfit btw), we’re ready to give you the most important headlines from this week in reproductive rights (and wrongs). Buckle up.
Bad News for Ohio’s Tiny Coffin Market
Storytime! Back in 2020 in the far away land of Ohio, bad people passed a bad bill that required abortion providers to cremate and bury every abortion.
This evil scheme was just another attempt to burden clinics with extra costs, and try to shut them down, and worst of all, criminalize folks for how they dispose of their pregnancy outcomes. Creepy right? Like, what’s next, y’all? Mass funerals for gym socks? R.I.Precum. Anyhoo, the plot THICKENS.
In 2023, Ohio voters enshrined abortion in their constitution and the process of getting rid of this freakish law began. Cut to this week. Finally, an appellate court blocked most of that heinous bill, so now, the zealots who forced these funerals into law can shove all those itty, bitty, teenie, tiny urns up their gigantic assholes!
And Speaking Of Gaping Ones, Look Out, Because Iran isn’t The Only War Hegseth Is Waging!
While US troops are bombing girls’ schools in Iran because of oil, Bible borders, and the return of Jeebus, these Pentagon prayer warriors have also escalated their war against abortion access for current service members and veterans.
A near-total abortion ban is now in effect at the Department of Veterans Affairs, allowing care only if a VA physician certifies it’s necessary to save the pregnant veteran’s life. And TBH, we have zero faith that the sex pest who runs the military (who does Crossfit with the sexpest who runs the health department) is gonna make sure we have righteous physicians looking out for veterans who need abortion care.
America: Where you fight for your country and your country fights against you.
Abort Your Frown Lines!
Facing a $100M shortfall because of cuts to Medicaid in the past year, more than 50 Planned Parenthood clinics have closed nationwide while others have had to get… creative…like offering… Botox?
Planned Parenthood’s botox services are apparently cheaper than local medi spas, plus you get the bonus of protestors screaming, “Life Begins at Injection!” when you walk in the door.
Great New Episode Next Week To Honor Abortion Provider Appreciation Week!
We know you miss them terribly, but Moji and Lizz are still out with AAF staff out on the road with Michael Shannon & Jason Narducy on their incredible REM celebration tour preaching the gospel of abortion, signing up new volunteers, and visiting our favorite folks… INDIE ABORTION PROVIDERS.
AAAAAND having said that, they are back next week FOR ABORTION PROVIDER APPRECIATION WEEK!
Your Buzzkills are doing a very special episode celebrating with these incredible guests! It is moving, informative and the love letter you want as we celebrate these amazing humans!
Now for Some Ways You Can Fight Back!
You’re all caught up on the bans, Botox, and fetus burials of the week, so let’s get out in the community and do some good!
Sign Up for the AAF Volunteer Skill Share!
You have the skills, we’ve got the clinics – let’s put them together! Do you do landscaping, are you great at taxes, can you edit video and create graphics? Tell us all about it, and we’ll do our best to connect you with clinics that need your skills! Trust us… everybody has skills to share.
We can all help out in our own ways – fill out the form now and help us build up our network to support abortion!!
Check Out Our Activist Calendar Below
Our Activist calendar is loaded with events and actions both nationally or in your community – pick your poison and get your boots on the ground!
Not feeling like you wanna dig around a calendar? We chose a highlight just for you!
FEATURED ACTIVIST EVENT THIS WEEK
Whether you’re in a state with or without an abortion ban, do you know your rights?
With new laws dropping basically every five seconds, the folks at Whole Woman’s Health Alliance know that it’s hard to keep up! Join them for a Know Your Rights training on Wednesday, March 11th at 2pm ET — sign up here!
WANT MORE AAF? You Got it!
- For the latest abobo news, follow us errywhere you social @abortionfront
- Pod with us! Subscribe to our hilarious weekly abortion podcast Feminist Buzzkills Drops Fridays wherever you pod
- Video Hilarity! Laugh ‘til ya pee watching our bounty of comedy videos
We hear that Mercury has entered its first retrograde of the year and we can feel it! Thanks for staying updated on all things abortion as we navigate the planets moving around (and people trying to deny us our basic rights).
