Planned Parenthood President Cecile Richards Is Too Cool For School (Or At Least Jason Chaffetz)

by Taia Handlin

Earlier this week, Cecile Richards, the president of Planned Parenthood, appeared before the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee to answer some very insightful and sensitive questions regarding the nature of money in government, and what it means to truly work for the people in a democracy.

Just kidding!

She was barraged with questions regarding her salary, travel expenses, who is really getting all those abortions if all of America loves the Bible so hard, and why, if Planned Parenthood wasn’t totally guilty everything in those videos, did she ever apologize? Below are some of my favorite moments.

Around the 46 minute mark, Representative Jason Chaffetz (R-OH) pulled a chart with a big scary red arrow with the big scary “ABORTIONS” going up and a sad pink arrow with “CANCER SCREENING AND PREVENTION SERVICES” going down:


Richards had no earthly idea where this chart came from until her whispered in her ear and she told Chaffetz what’s what: “Excuse me, my lawyer is informing me that the source of this is actually Americans United for Life, which is an anti-abortion group. So, I would check your source.” Code for:


Around the 23-minute mark, Representative Carol Maloney (D-NY) seriously objected to the committee’s interrogation of Richards’ salary: “I would like to register my opposition and my objection to the chairman beating up on a woman, on our witness today, for making a good salary. I find it totally inappropriate and discriminatory.” Ignoring the fact that Richards’ salary is not more than the norm for someone in her position, and if anything is less, this was to be expected; general wisdom holds that everyone involved in a nonprofit must suffer, and Planned Parenthood doubly so because I heard that one time they wandered in the general direction of someone’s vagina.


Finally, I loved around the 60-minute mark, when Representative Cynthia Lummis (R-WY) wanted to know where all that gosh darned travel money went (roughly 5.1 million in 2013): “What is all that money being spent on?” she said with the air of a 10-year-old grappling with life’s greater mysteries. The road to hell, Representative Lummis. First-class seats to hell for all those slutty women spreading their legs and chucking condoms left and right.

 Video of the full hearing can be found here or below: 

Images via Planned Parenthood, Quickmeme 


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