Bridget Everett, how do I love thee? Let me count the ways. You wear fabulously revealing get-ups for all your sets, you're a lady whose size can rival the guys, you look hot all the time, you make some of the bluest jokes I've ever heard, you have "the voice of an angel," you guest regularly on Inside Amy Schumer, and Time Out named you one of the "funniest New Yorkers." 

If you aren't acquainted with all that, Bridget's brand-spankin'-new NSFW video is about something we all know and love: "Titties." What better place for this exclusive premiere than right here on BUST.com?

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Everett's act has been previously televised on Inside Amy Schumer and Just for Laughs' Funny as Hell. But, you know, tits are like, super offensive when they're in public, so despite growling "BOUNCE, BOUNCE, BOUNCE" while grinding on the crotch of a stranger in the audience, no nip slipped in the taping of those shows.

Everett's band The Tender Moments, featuring DJ Ad-Rock, backs up the cabaret star as a slot machine flips through a lovely assortment of titties. The video is so hilarious because her categorical descriptions of boobs are spot-on. I could picture these boobs in my head before the video existed, although I won't lie: there are some I was confused by that are now totally clear, like "mousetrap titties." Curious what I mean? You're just gonna have to watch the video to find out.

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Though Bridget Everett's in-your-face humour may be shocking at first, but she's only up in your grill because she's discussing subjects that so often cause us to avert our gaze. The boobs in the video are sexy without being sexualized, just like Bridget herself. Seeing a range of body types, and yes, boob shapes, is valuable representation.

Last year Bridget Everett and The Tender Moments self-released their album Pound It, available on Amazon and iTunes, which includes both "Titties" and "What I Gotta Do." Everett's comedy may be NSFW, but it's safe to say she werks it!

Also, make sure to catch Bridget Everett and The Tender Moments at Joe's Pub on August 6th !

Is Bridget Everett's new video the tits? Leave a comment below.

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