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19 Lisa Simpson Quotes To Get You Through Your Week

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An open letter to Lisa Simpson: Could you please become real so you can be our president? I know you'll forever be an eight-year-old girl, wise beyond her years. But technically, you've been around since 1989, so only a few more years until you're eligible to run! Since your inception, you've been an inspiration to women everywhere. We fell in love with your beautiful mind and kind soul. Surrounded by chaos, you stay true to your convitions, unafraid to question authority. You taught us that true confidence comes from believing in your own abilities to handle challenges as opposed to relying on external validation. So, in your honor, here are 19 moments of you making us all feel a little less alone.

1. 2ilq8b 87a5a"Well, I'm going to be a famous jazz musician. I've got it all figured out. I'll be unappreciated in my own country, but my gutsy blues stylings will electrify the French. I'll avoid the horrors of drug abuse, but I do plan to have several torrid love affairs, and I may or may not die young. I haven't decided." (Separate Vocations, s. 3 ep. 18)

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When Springfield Elementary forces the kids to take career aptitude tests, Lisa is told she is best suited to be a homemaker. While there’s nothing wrong with the occupation (I mean, it’s Marge who’s keeping this family together, after all), Lisa knows deep down what she wants, and she spends the rest of the episode determined to live her dreams. Here, Lisa proves that living the life you want takes courage. People will disapprove and discourage, but you’re entitled to shine and make big plans and have as many torrid love affairs as you please.

2. 2ilqiu b230c"Millions of girls will grow up thinking that this is the right way to act....that they can never be more than vacuous ninnies whose only goal is to look pretty, land a rich husband, and spend all day on the phone with their equally vacuous friends talking about how damn terrific it is to look pretty and have a rich husband!" (Lisa vs. Malibu Stacy, s. 5 ep. 14)

In arguably one of Lisa’s most feminist adventures, she challenges the makers of Malibu Stacy to create a talking doll that isn’t sexist. And she succeeds, creating Lisa Lionheart, voiced by herself! Both a businesswoman and an activist, Lisa knows women deserve better, and when her needs aren’t met, she’s not afraid takes matters into her own hands.

3.  2i3gce 31603"My interests include music, science, justice, animals, shapes, feelings..." (Scuse Me While I Miss the Sky, s. 14 ep. 16)

It’s important to have a rich interior life. Like Lisa, you contain multitudes. Take some time for yourself. You work hard. You’re allowed to enjoy things.

4. 2i3jkz 4abe7 "I learned that beneath my goody two-shoes lies some very dark socks."  (Dial “N” for Nerder, s. 19 ep. 14)

Lisa may be a lover of music, justice, animals, shapes and feelings, but don’t underestimate her. Moral of the story? Never mistake kindness for weakness.

5. 2hw9nl 0ff2b"You mean those leagues where parents push their kids into vicious competition to compensate for their own failed dreams of glory?" (The Secret War of Lisa Simpson, s. 8 ep. 25)

I. FEEL. SO. SEEN. If school sports were also hell for you, you know what I mean. Lisa is failing gym class, and if she wants to pass, she needs to join a sports program outside of school. Like me, she’s not happy about it. Unlike me, she ends up being pretty amazing at ice hockey.

6. 2ilqsb a4527"It's not my nature to complain, but so far today we've had three movies, two filmstrips, and an hour and a half of magazine time. I just don't feel challenged." (The Secret War of Lisa Simpson, s. 8 ep. 25)

As women, we’re conditioned to believe that we should be compliant, so speaking up and asking for what you need can be daunting. Lisa knows her education is too important to settle for a lackluster curriculum. She demands to be heard and challenged, so she joins Bart at military school because "magazine time" just isn't cutting it.>

7. 2i3jrl 29b17"I am tired of being a corporate shill! From now on, I will speak out against the evils in society from dog-napping to cigarettes!" (Lisa the Beauty Queen, s. 4 ep. 4)

When she’s crowned "Little Miss Springfield," Lisa refuses to let her image be used for corporate gains. So she uses her newfound fame and platform to speak about issues important to her like funding for education and the arts. We gotta value our voices and feel like they count, no matter how many followers we have.

8. 2hwa25 26ab1"Why is it when a woman is confident and powerful, they call her a witch?" (Treehouse of Horror XIX, s. 20 ep.4) 

Because they're scared of confident, powerful women. Remember, WITCH = Woman In Total Control of Herself. 

9. 2hw94c c9e66"There's a lot more to it than that, Bart. I don't just babysit. I sell peace of mind for a dollar an hour. Two dollars after 9 o'clock." (My Sister, My Sitter, s. 8 ep. 17)

In this episode, Lisa’s entrepreneurial skills kick in and she decides to take up babysitting. At first, no one takes her seriously because of her age. But nevertheless, she persists and builds up a steady roster of clients. Bart gets jealous and belittles her work, but Lisa claps back with this amazing response. No job is too big or too small for Lisa. And she can negotiate a salary, too.

10. 2i3ke7 7df2a"Dad! 'The Second Amendment' is just a remnant from revolutionary day. It has no meaning today." (The Cartridge Family, s. 9 ep. 5)

Lisa knows that society and culture are always changing, therefore lawmaking policies should reflect that.

11. 2i3hyr f0dcf"Okay, I'm not going to give up. Solitude never hurt anyone. Emily Dickinson lived alone, and she wrote some of the most beautiful poetry the world has ever known...then went crazy as a loon." (The Secret War of Lisa Simpson, s. 8 ep. 25) 

While Lisa worries that her education is not challenging enough, Bart is sent to military school for his bad behavior. Upon seeing that the military school is more difficult than Springfield Elementary, Lisa decides she wants to go and becomes its first female student (yayy congrats!). Military school proves to be more challenging than Lisa thought. Feeling lonely and homesick, Lisa considers going home but finds her inner strength and determines to stick it out. We’ve all had moments where we feel like we don’t belong. We’ve all had moments where we feel like giving up. But the most important thing is how we talk to ourselves in these situations. Lisa doesn’t let the opinions of others determine her capabilities, and she wouldn’t want you to either.

12. 2hw9qt 9a779"It's amazing how I can feel sorry for you and hate you at the same time. I'm sure there's a German word for it." (How Munched Is That Birdie in the Window? s. 22 ep. 7)

Enough said.

13. 2ilo3y 71377"An open letter to the people of Springfield. Today, our town lost what remained of its fragile civility drowned in a sea of low fat pudding. We are a town of lowbrows, no brows and ignorami. We have eight malls, but no symphony. Thirty-two bars, but no alternative theater. Thirteen stores that begin with 'Le Sex.' I write this letter not to nag or whine, but to prod. We can better ourselves....Well, most of us." (They Saved Lisa’s Brain, s. 10 ep. 22)

Another great example of Lisa using her voice and challenging Springfield's status quo. Fed up with Springfield’s lack of culture and sophistication, she writes an open letter that ends up in the newspaper. The Springfield chapter of Mensa is impressed and invites her to join. She also gets to meet Stephen Hawking.

14. 2ilr2h 35a34"Mom, I know your intentions are good, but aren't the police the protective force that maintains the status quo for the wealthy elite? Don't you think we ought to attack the roots of social problems instead of jamming people into overcrowded prisons?" (The Springfield Connection, s. 6 ep. 23)

Lisa vocalizes her issues with her mother's new career and the prison system at large and Marge, at a loss for words, desperately attempts to distract her with a puppet. A classic element of Simpsons comedy in which Lisa's accute honesty makes others uncomfortable with their blissful ignorance. 

15. 2ilrxw 4e109"Well, I wish that you wouldn't. Because aside from the fact that he has the same frailties as all human beings, he's the only father I have. Therefore, he is my model of manhood, and my estimation of him will govern the prospects of my adult relationships. So I hope you bear in mind that any knock at him is a knock at me, and I am far too young to protect myself against such onslaughts." (Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire, s. 1 ep. 1)

When Selma and Patty trash Homer, Lisa stands up for her dad. While Homer isn’t the perfect "model of manhood," we don’t get to choose our family. Lisa won’t accept that kind of negativity into her life.

16. 2i3kax febe9"Dad, it's 3am. Can't you mutter in your room?" (The Cartridge Family, s. 9 ep. 5)

Always asking the important questions.

17. 2i3hv6 3c7c3"Does it make you feel superior to tear down people's dreams?" (‘Scuse Me While I Miss the Sky, s. 14 ep. 16)

Never apologize for having dreams. Never apologize for wanting things. People’s discouragement is useless, so don't use it. Don't let that bullshit inside your beautiful mind. It has no bearing on your life. Have your goals. Work at them day by day. Negativity is noise. Change the station.

18. 2i3k49 b9929"Look, Dad! I made a modern studio apartment for my Malibu Stacey Doll. This is the kitchen. This is where she prints her weekly feminist newsletter...Dad! You're not listening to me!" (Lisa the Greek, s. 3 ep. 14)

A perfect, modern, feminist utopia. Come work at BUST, Lisa!!

19. 2i8711 f961c"For once in your life, be cool." (The Simpsons Movie

Lisa may be a feminist icon, but that doesn't mean she's free of any doubts or insecurities. Lisa's relatability undoubtedly makes us feel close to her. We grew up watching Lisa deal with a chaotic family life. We saw her cope with feeling misunderstood, underestimated, alone and anxious for her future. We saw her going after what she wanted and what she believed was right despite her vulnerabilities. We saw Lisa in ourselves.

Header photo via FOX 

Other photos created by author via imgflip.com 

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Hi there! I’m a comedian, writer and actress living in New York City. I’m the only person to have a subscription to Nickelodeon Magazine without access to the Nickelodeon channel. My favorite movie is George Of The Jungle. Follow me on Twitter and Instagram @stonecoldvolpe and check out my website francescavolpe.com for more of my writing and silly videos! 

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