All your dreams are about to come true. No longer want to be a fairy princess for Halloween? Do you want to be taken more seriously by all the big boys and girls? Well now, for a mere $70 you can be sexy Donald Trump (although I call bullshit because the wig is an extra $10 and everyone knows The Donald is his hair).



Technically you won’t be Donald but “Donna T. Rumpshaker,” whoever the hell that is.

Not only will you sexually confuse every Halloween party-goer, but the Tumpinator himself will surely come a-knockin’ because the only thing that that man wants to bang more than his daughter is himself. Don’t just do it for yourself, do it for him. Make all his dreams come true. Except his presidential dreams. Don’t do that to the rest of us.

New Fall Issue d217c

Man Saying

 Images via Facebook, Yandy, and giphy


This Donald Trump Portrait Was Painted With Blood

Dear Donald Trump: Periods Are Not An Insult 

Republican Debate Candidates Have No Idea Which Woman To Put On The $10 Bill, Default To Their Mothers 

Taia is a fabulous human who is working and writing in New York City. She writes about politics, reproductive rights, and pop culture. When not writing she likes to sleep, read Carl Sagan, and do as many squats as her legs can handle. Follow her on Twitter @taiahandlin and Facebook as Taia Handlin.

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