Sean Penn Wrote A Terrible Poem About #MeToo
Sean Penn wrote a novel called Bob Honey Who Just Do Stuff, because lots of white, male celebrities think they have something of literary note to say. The Huffington Post bravely held their noses and reviewed the book, which is an incoherent clusterfuck, to put it mildly. The crown jewel of this dumpster fire is a poem about #MeToo:
Though warrior women
Bravely walk the walk,
Derivatives of disproportion
Draw heinous hypocrites
To their flock.
[….]
Where did all the laughs go?
Are you out there, Louis C.K.?
Once crucial conversations
Kept us on our toes;
Was it really in our interest
To trample Charlie Rose?
And what’s with this ‘Me Too’?
This infantilizing term of the day…
Is this a toddler’s crusade?
Reducing rape, slut-shaming, and suffrage to reckless child’s play?
A platform for accusation impunity?
Due process has lost its sheen?
But, fuck it, what me worry?
I’m a hero,
To Time Magazine!
An Update On #WhoBitBeyoncé
We might have an answer as to who bit Beyoncé on the face. Actor and comedian Tiffany Haddish revealed that this bizarre incident happened during interviews with Vulture and GQ, and the Internet has done some sleuthing. Vulture has a detailed investigation and has the receipts to back up their conclusions. TMZ’s number one suspect is Sanaa Lathan in the most bizarre whodunit of all time.
Walmart Removes Cosmo From The Checkout Line
Cosmopolitan will no longer be in the checkout line at Walmart, according to Fortune. The titan of capitalism has removed the magazine in a weird attempt to support the #MeToo movement. An anti-pornography group, the National Center on Sexual Exploitation, was instrumental in the decision and said it’s “what real change looks like in our #MeToo culture.” This equates providing articles about sex and consensual sex tips with sexual assault. These are not the same thing. At all.
R. Kelly Groomed a 14-Year-Old Girl To Be His “Sex Pet”
BBC3’s new documentary about the R&B star brings new accusations to light. The Guardian writes that R Kelly: Sex, Girls and Videotapes includes an interview with Kelly’s former girlfriend Kitti Jones, who says he groomed a 14-year-old girl to be his “sex pet.” This is hardly the first time Kelly has been accused of pedophilia, as he faced child pornography charges in 2008 and numerous women and girls have told the media that he is abusive and targets teenagers.
North Carolina Will No Longer Shackle Inmates While They Give Birth
North Carolina’s prison director Kenneth Lassiter signed a new policy ending the practice of restraining pregnant incarcerated folks while they are in labor. Under this policy, inmates will be handcuffed on the way to the hospital. Once there, leg and wrist restraints will be removed when contractions begin, and won’t be used during bonding, skin-to-skin contact, and breastfeeding, reports The Hill. They can be used if there is “an immediate, credible risk of escape.” The American Congress of Obstetricians and Gynecologists has vocally opposed restraining people in labor since 2011.
Illinois Nurses Aren’t Being Trained To Do Rape Kits
The Chicago Tribune reports that most Illinois nurses don’t have the proper training to conduct a rape kit. Of the greater than 196,000 registered nurses in the state, only 32 are sexual assault nurse examiners certified to work adult patients. Out of this 32, only 12 are certified to work with children. 2016 saw 4,500 people in Illinois seek emergency room care after being sexually assaulted or raped, and 10,000 others went to state-funded rape crisis centers. Whether or not survivors receive competent, compassionate care varies widely based on where they go and who works there. Nurses and legislators are trying to change that.
The NYPD Is Failing Sexual Assault Survivors
NYC’s Department of Investigation (DOI) released a 165-page report detailing how the NYPD underfunds and understaffs its Special Victims Division (SVD), which handles sexual assault cases. “In March 2018, NYPD’s homicide squads had 101 detectives with 282 homicides in 2017; during the same time period, SVD’s adult sex crime units had only 67 detectives despite its 2017 caseload of 5,661,” says the report. The Cut writes that the report also accuses the NYPD of failing to take “acquaintance rapes” seriously, and prioritizing “stranger rapes.”
Published March 28, 2018
Top photo via Wikimedia Commons/Georges Biard
More from BUST
R. Kelly’s Victim Jerhonda Pace Asks The Me Too Movement, “What About Us?”: Link Roundup
There Shouldn’t Be Shame In Liking “Girl Music”
Women With Shaved Heads Are Having A Pop Culture Moment — Showing How Political Hair Can Be
