If you’re all caught up on Jane the Virgin, you know that in season three, Jane fulfills her lifelong dream of becoming a published author, getting a book deal for a romance novel based on her love story with her dear departed husband, Michael. (In before "HEY SPOILERS" — that episode aired ten months ago and if you want to avoid spoilers, you should watch TV in a timely manner!! RIP Michael, though.)
In season four, that book gets published, with a cover designed by her Jane’s new boyfriend, Adam, and a launch party engineered by Jane’s dad Rogelio, with the real-life Isabel Allende making a cameo as herself.
Now, you can buy a Jane’s romance novel in real life. Just like in the show, it’s titled Snow Falling and features an extremely romance novel-y cover of a shirtless, ripped Michael and a cleavagey Jane. Sure, a lot of the plot is just seasons one and two of Jane the Virgin with the names swapped out (Jane becomes Josephine, Rafael becomes Rake, Michael becomes Martin, etc.) and the characters transplanted to 1902 Miami, but the over-the-top-ness of the series translates well to a romance novel — plus, the sex scenes are just a little more explicit than what’s shown on TV.
Here’s a look at 7 of my favorite sentences::
1. When Rake/Rafael is introduced:
“He could be the embodiment of the swashbuckling pirate hero in one of the books Josephine longed to write one day.”
2. The narrator’s response when Josephine/Jane gets pregnant the old-fashioned way (no accidental artificial insemination here!):
“I hope Abuela is not reading this.”
3. When Josephine/Jane’s famous grilled cheese sandwiches make an appearance:
“‘One-third white Cheddar, one-third yellow Cheddar, and one-third grated American.”
Note: this sent me down a Wiki-wormhole because I was sure that American cheese didn’t exist in 1902 Miami, but it turns out that although American cheese as we know it wasn't invented until 1911 and wasn't common until the 1920s, the first documented use of the phrase "American cheese" is in 1804! So it’s plausible! There you go, some cheese facts to impress your friends with.
4. An item from Ronaldo/Rogelio’s 1902 version of a tour rider:
“I would like to take a nap before the show so, for that, I will need a different, east-facing room to avoid the afternoon sun.”
5. Penelope/Petra’s snarky reaction when Josephine/Jane gives birth:
“Pain glazing her features into a porcelain mask, she said, ‘I assume the hotel clerk had your little love child.’”
6. Josephine/Jane looking at Martin/Michael holding baby Marcos/Mateo:
“She wasn’t sure if there was anything more touching—and enticing—than a powerful man holding an innocent baby so tenderly.”
7. Jane’s acknowledgements note to Rafael:
“And finally, my deepest gratitude to Rafael Solano, without whom this book wouldn’t have been written. Thank you for being the first person who believed in me as a writer. Thank you for teaching me how to be brave.”
ICYMI, Jane reads this note to Rafael before her launch party in season 4, and it’s one of the most touching moments of the season so far, making Rafael (and viewers) cry...and setting the stage for the possibility of Jane and Rafael getting back together once again.
Images via Jane the Virgin/The CW
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