Fuckboys. You've likely encountered the term on social media. I've used the word to describe a few unfortunate dates and ex-boyfriends. Claimed it as possibly the greatest term of the century. And believe I know several men who should seriously consider tattooing it on their forehead (and ass—just as a secondary reminder).
Everyone knows what fuckboy means. And no one knows what fuckboy means.
Either way, it’s an insult. And refers to a man who doesn’t know how to properly treat a woman. A man who needs to watch some Ryan Gosling movies and read a few Nicholas Sparks novels. Study and imitate, boys, study and imitate.
But, what exactly is a fuckboy?
Are we talking about the guy who doesn’t call after the first date? The ex-boyfriend who broke up with you over text? The mysterious Tinder guy—fully equipped with a man-bun and plethora of too-sexy selfies—whose first message only includes a single winky face?
The answer is yes, yes, and yes. All of the above. (Really, who sends a single winky face as the first message? Might as well just text, I’m a fuckboy, allow me to fuck you over, please).
I googled fuckboy and found some magnificent definitions.
“…The worst kind of guy, or at least one who represents the worst trends of the present moment.”
“A person who is a weak-ass pussy
that ain't 'bout shit.”
Urban Dictionary provides a full list of fuckboy descriptions to help you avoid these men at all costs.
How to spot a fuckboy:
1. White Nike tube socks with his Adidas sandals
2. He wants to play 20 questions (Do not play! Especially if there’s a “;)” involved)
3. Relies on his mom but doesn’t respect women
4. Looks like he just read one of Jaden Smith’s tweets in all of his selfies
5. Can’t find the clitoris
But let's be honest. In reality, you can’t identify a fuckboy based on his tube socks. Or his man-bun. Or his ability to locate your clitoris (okay, that last one may be debatable).
What determines a fuckboy is what’s found within his heart—or rather, what’s not found. The little big things such as integrity, moral fiber, compassion. Actions reveal character. And he never calls. Only texts past 9 p.m. He doesn’t know your middle name, didn’t get you anything for your birthday, and only asks to hang out when you’re not on your period. Doesn't care to meet your family. Claims relationships just aren’t for him. In a couple months he’ll be gone and you’ll be hurt. That’s all there is to it.
Fuckboy describes more than just a selfish, inconsiderate dude. Fuckboy describes a culture—the culture of men disrespecting women.
Chivalry is hard to find. Love letters are dead. The innocent sweetness of dating is almost nonexistent. If you’re a woman dating in this modern world of Tinder and sext-snapping, you get what I'm saying. Fuckboys are serious business. Not the type of guy you want to be with. Not a man who will make you happy. Be aware and recognize when a man is using you. Realize your immeasurable worth and all that you deserve—much more than anything a fuckboy can give you.
As long as there are men and women, there will be fuckboys, and this shit will keep happening. Surely most men are not like this. I have an internal hope that the good guys are still out there, somewhere.
But, geez, they’re good at hiding, am I right?
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