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((((michelina)))) I wish I had checked in sooner. How are you? I am in such awe of your strength and grace in growing your family. Where are you now in terms of next IVF cycle? I can't believe your little girl has now passed her first birthday! Isn't that just amazing! LittleF is now two. We finalized his adoption at the end of March (yahoo!) and today we finally got his birth certificate in the mail. I will check back more often so that I don't miss any more news.
Thinking of you and hoping that you get some good news soon.
Jenny - So great to hear from you! I cannot believe your son is 2.5 already! It must be a fun and challenging stage right now. Then again, all stages are fun and challenging, I guess!

Fookie - Great to hear from you too! Congratulations on the official adoption. I am so happy for you. I know you had a difficult journey, and I could not be happier for you. And your son is 2 now. Crazy!

Thanks to both of you for the kind words. I am doing much better since June began. I am still sad that the cycle failed, but I need to believe that there is a reason, and that it will all make sense someday. When we get our second baby, it will make sense then. And if we are not able to, then we will cherish the one we do have (like we do already!) and will never forget what a miracle she is.

I have made it my mission to be open about infertility because I feel there are too many people suffering in silence. I have had people open up to me about their own struggles by being open with them, and I'm glad I can be a support.

I am hoping to do the frozen transfer at the end of July. I need to have a hysteroscopy soon so that I'll know if I have a polyp or not. (I should have insisted on that prior to the fresh cycle.) If I am polyp free, I should be good to go at the end of July. If not, I'll need to have it removed, which will delay things. I will keep you posted!
Oh wow, new posts! So great to hear from everyone.

Fookie, huge congratulations on the adoption going through. You must be so relieved after such a bumpy ride. Michelina, sorry to hear about the last cycle. I'm glad you're feeling more positive now though, and fingers crossed for the hysteroscopy. Do you have a date?

Babybird is 19 months old, would you believe? He's a daredevil and a chatterbox, climbing fearlessly onto any surface we think he can't reach while giving us a running commentary. He's a beanpole - tall and skinny like his parents - with beautiful, startling red-gold hair (unlike his parents. We get plenty of comments about that!).

Architect Boy has been in remission for 15 months now. He won't be declared cancer-free until 2015, but it's been long enough that we can breathe a little easier these days. I'm back at work 3 days a week and BB goes to a lovely childminder.

Our biggest news is that I'm 21 weeks pregnant! Babybird v2.0 is due mid-October is probably a girl, according to our latest scan.
Funnybird!!!!! Congratulations. And I am SHOCKED that BB is 19 months now. WOW. I remember how SLOWLY time used to pass, waiting month after month. And now it's like the whole world is on fast forward. Thrilled to hear that ArchitectBoy is cancer free and on his way to being officially so in 2015. Glad you are both breathing easier.

Michelina, I'm so glad things are looking up again and you have another transfer to look forward to. I remember all too well the ups and downs of infertility and am thrilled that you are speaking openly about it. Good luck with the polyp-checking exam. Let us know how it all goes. Will be thinking of you.

Thank you both for your kind congrats regarding the adoption. The pain of our bumpy ride visits me only in the form of very infrequent nightmares, and the odd moment of tears when I let my brain linger too long on a memory. We are forming amazing relationships with LittleF's birth grandparents, as well as some other family members. His birth dad is currently incommunicado (his choice), which at this point allows us to heal, though I sincerely hope for contact in the future. His birth mom who had been unwilling to communicate recently opened up to us through her parents and we are now in email contact with hopes for a meeting next time she's in town. World of emotions about all of it, but zero doubt that we are doing the right thing. The world is good.
Funnybird - Congrats on your pregnancy! I am so happy for you! And wonderful news about your husband. Things are looking very bright in your world!

Fookie - I am super happy for you too! Have you met with your son's birth mother yet?

As for me, I am pregnant, but I am about to lose the baby. We decided to do an unmedicated IUI the cycle before our frozen embryo transfer. AMAZINGLY, it worked. We were thrilled, but my betas are just barely going up so it will be a loss. I am devastated. This is so much worse than a failed IVF. I have an ultrasound on Thursday. The worry is that this is ectopic. Baby number 1 came relatively easily for us once we finally got some help. Baby number 2 just isn't coming. We hope that a future IVF cycle will bring us our second (and final!) baby.
P.S. We won't be doing our frozen embryo transfer now because by the time my miscarriage happens and my body is somewhat healed, I'll be back at work. I wish we had never done the IUI. :-(
Just a quick update. I had an ultrasound on Tuesday and it showed a blighted ovum. I had a D & C hours after the ultrasound. We are very disappointed, but the grief would be much worse if there had actually been a dead baby on ultrasound. Back to the drawing board for me. :-(
I am shy of being 32 and I won't be done with grad school until 2014. I am oh-so-scared about trying to start a family when Im 35. I work with children with special needs and I am aware of the minimal things that can go wrong during pregnancy and how much can affect the child.

Did any of you started having a family later in life, if so, how are things?
I randomly decided to check on here! It's like old times. :-)

Kvee, this thread is not very active anymore. When it was active a few years back we had several women posting and a few were over 35. I say, you just can't know. It took me about a year to get pregnant when I was 32, but I've known several women who got pregnant almost immediately when they were in their late 30s.

I would say - take care of your body, check in with your doctor....they may be able to do a check of your eggs, your FSH (I think that's it) see how our fertility is hanging in....I have a feeling it will all be okay.

Funnybird, congrats on baby #2!!! Gawd...the time is FLYING! I know we all keep saying that, but it's so true. I'm so glad A-boy is in remission and doing well. That is awesome.

Michelina, I'm so sorry baby #2 is causing so much struggle and grief. I don't think people talk enough about secondary infertility and the pain it can cause. I've known a few women who dealt with that. I'm thinking of you and hoping for good things. I'm so glad your little girl is bringing you so much joy in the meantime.

Fookie, I never knew Baby F's adoption was finalized!!!! How did I miss that? AWESOME news. :-) :-) :-)

As for us, our little guy is really a little guy and not a baby anymore! He turned 2 this summer and is a total delight in every way. He goes to a little play school 2 days a week and loves it. He was slow to talk but now won't stop talking! ;-) He loves Caillou and our dog and playing with trains and cars.

I admit to sometimes feeling a twinge for another one even though Mr. Z is set on just one. He's 45 (not that I think that's old), but he says he already feels like an old dad and doesn't want to be an even older one. The truth is that I do love our family of three, and it does make sense for us financially and emotionally in many ways. I am glad I cherished my pregnancy...after those first few weeks it was a wonderful time. :-)

I won't wait so long to check in again. Michelina, keep us updated!

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Zelda - So great to see an update from you! I check the site on and off, but I guess it had been more than a month since I last checked! Great to hear that all is well. Hard to believe your little guy is 2 already...

As for me, I am pregnant! I did another IUI right after my D & C. I didn't even wait a cycle. It was another unmedicated IUI and I thought it was another long shot. To my shock, it worked again! It has been a rough pregnancy so far with bleeding and spotting in the first 6 weeks (I thought I was miscarrying many times) but all is looking well on ultrasound. I am now 13 weeks with a due date in early May.

Funnybird, I'd love to hear from you too! I'm thinking you probably had your baby by now.
Michelina, that is wonderful news! Congratulations! And at 13 weeks you've got to be feeling pretty secure in your news. I am so pleased for you.

Wow, how funny life we were three years ago worrying we would never be mothers, and we both had babies and you are on #2. Life is good. Thinking of you! Keep us updated!!!
Wow Michelina, that's fabulous news! Hooray for long-shots.

Yes, our baby girl - Martha - arrived 4 weeks ago. The delivery couldn't have been more different to last time; this time I had a short, manageable labour and lovely, peaceful waterbirth. She's a little peach with a headfull of black hair. Babybird is coping quite well. He's mostly fascinated by the amount of poo she produces.

Other big news for us is that we're moving to the US at the end of the year! Architect Boy's practice are sending him to Oklahoma City to run an office over there for a couple of years, so we're very relieved that Obama won on Tuesday...
very nice post
I check and check this forum ... And nothing. And then I don't check it for awhile and ... All kinds of news!!

Congrats Michelina and Funnybird!

Michelina, !'m so sorry this second pregnancy has been such a tough journey. Have so much admiration for your strenth. So happy to read that the ultrasounds are looking good.

Funnybird, happy to read that Architectboy is doing well. The move sounds excititng.

Zelda, I didn't post about finalization on Facebook, because some birth family members are connected to us that way. Considering our adoption journey it would have been insensitive to be celebrating so publicly. But what a weird thing to have to think about. I hope little F is never sad we didn't make a big splash over finalization. We had a couple of rings made and inscribed with "F Forever" and the date. We wear them on our right hand ring fingers and F calls them our "i love F" rings.

Amazing what has become of our adoption relationships. F sees his bio maernal grandparents and teenaged aunt once per week while MrF and I head out rock climbing. It's a big giant love fest smile.gif for all of us. We send birth dad update emails every six months, but he has not responded to the last two... Don't really know where my heart is on thatone, but we have time on ours sides right now. Birth mom initiated email contact last summer, but more to try to repair damage with her mom than to eally connect. She never asked about F or commented on photos sent. She has not emailed since August. Also conflicted there. Want it for F, so badly, but still dealing with the aftermath of her choices re birth father as well as processing anger over all the risk that She exposed F to. Complex emotions. Sigh.

Family life is bliss and like Zelda's hubby, I have close to no desire to start over. Definitely not with a baby... I have this inner feeling that at some point an older child may come to us ... But we'll see. Also like Zelda, finance and dynamic wise, our family of three makes so much sense.
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