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missladyj..That is hysterical...I get that way when I see a bunch of prom girls in the bathroom...This year I heard a group discussing Thier fake toenails! Such rivoting stuff! And all their dates were waiting outside in white tux's with different shades of PINK vests and ties. God, these poor young men. Whipped so young! I casn honestly say, I have never been with a man who would wear pink intentionally.
I also have sidewalk rage. A few weeks ago I had to cross a busy intersection while with my dog. Fortunately, there was adequate pedestrian signs and when it was finally my turn to go I looked where I was supposed to and ventured out onto the street and some motherfucker decided it would be okay to make right hand turn and almost run me and my dog over. Thanks. I wish the car had been closer so I could have kicked the car door in.
I have fleas. My dog has fleas. My cat has fleas. The whole house has fleas. And I just picked a tick off of myself.
On another board I am trolling for the first time. Nothing terrible really just absolutely stupid and lame. I thought it would be funny to copy this troll and now I have a troll family. I was up late last night maniacally laughing my ass off because I've spawned a whole family of copycat trollers. I know I shouldn't take such delight in something so idiotic but I do.
I'm tired of being nice to all the idiots of the world, particularly on the web. I hate people in general and am sick of biting my tongue to be the bigger person. I feel like the fact that I'm smarter than 90+% of them entitles me to tell them to shut up and keep their stupid opinions to themselves. I don't think I'd regret letting my inner bitch out a little, either. Only one other person knows the depths of meanness that I'm capable of, and I don't know that she'd tell me to keep repressing it if I asked.
Everything Tallgirl said, I could have said.

Certain websites have become like car crashes to me. I can't stop myself from reading and posting and looking for the glimmers of intelligence I remember from days of old, though annoyance is too often the only result.
((maryjo & tallgirl)) It's sad when it's hard to tell the Busties from the trolls.

My confession is that this whole troll facination has made me utterly depressed. Busties I once admired are behaving just as bad as the accused trolls...and all the off topic remarks about "guyliner" and "pie" just seem childishly passive aggressive to me. I'll admit, I've baited and falmed a few trolls...but this is getting completely out of hand. Our resident preacher hasn't even been bugging us because he's having too much fun sitting back and watching us implode on our own.
the older I get, the less able to roll w/ life's punches I seem to get. I always thought it would be the reverse?
i am turning into one of those conservative mothers. what happened to hippy me? not as in dreadlocks and pot smoking, i mean as in dressing like rainbow brite and always having time for crafts and walks in the woods and stupid, pointless fun? duurrr, the bank is Ruining me i tells ya. Ruining! i dress like a mommy, it SUCKS!!! i'm a radical freakster, i AM i AM!
sigh, it's an uphill battle and i'm tired. i feel myself succumbing to the blah. stupid dresscode.
i may have gone over board on the confessions...(i lurk alot)
however, here goes...
i hope i didnt piss celimee (sp?) off in the general dating thread with my comments..
i want to see what doodlebug looks like. she is always very descriptive when describing what she is wearing or has on and i want to put a face to the descriptions....whenever i travel i am always looking to see if i will see doodlebug, (as if i would know it if i really did)
when i am out i am always looking at someone (female) wondering if she BUSTS..(thinking in my head "she looks like a "BUST" woman")
i have some favorite busties whom i love reading their posts and i wonder what they look like.
okay thread is the soap opera thread to me. i hate to miss a day reading in there because i will lose track of whats going on with the *characters* (i always want to post in there but feel like i never have anything to say that will get a response so i don't post in there.)
i think bkln and aural are argumentative, they challenge people alot.
whammy makes the longest posts ever.
i look forward to yummymum, fj, poodle, and doodle's posts...also like reading pepper, speedy, tesao, and pixie's posts...
i love bust, and all of the busters have distinct things that i notice about them...i guess from so much lurking...really, i wonder what majority of the busters look like in real life.
i also want to confess that i wanted to see what fj looked like so i searched the word "rusty trumpet" on myspace (that i heard (read) poodle mention about fj's husbands myspace name to get it to hopefully link me to fj's page) (which it did) and yes she is as pretty as i imagined!

ok, enough back to lurking.....
I agree with Tallgirl. why am I surrounded by morons?

Pixie,my bathroom bitchiness started out with physically throwing a man out of the womens bathroom because he didn't want to wait in the long ass line for the mens bathroom. I told him we wait in line all the time, get out,
but I'm a nice guy he whines
I don't fucking care, get out
it felt soooo good!!

My husband is now worried that the next time I go to the bathroom I will get in a fight. i just hope it is at a club where I know all the bouncers so I can get some annoying stupid ho kicked out.

i have a lot of venom.

My aquatic supervisor is an ass. At the end of this session I am taking my deep water aerobics class to another facility and the women who have been taking my class for three fucking years will come with me if I go. which means that your organization will lose money so fuck you! I am unreplaceable!

sorry ladies, that was more of a rant than a confession. I apologize for that
I just nearly lost a friend, entirely due to my own oblivious insensitivity.
OT [pixie- the guyliner thing wasn't passive agressiveness, it was just off topic for that thread. I thought it was light-hearted and fun, which we were desparately needing...just my take on it.]
I've lurked on Bust since June of 2002. I lurked for a looooooooooooong time before posting because I thought I never had anything good enough to post. I find it extremely unhealthy for me personally to lurk and post on this board and other boards but I do it anyway.
I have an obsession with winning the lottery. I plan out and write down exactly what I would do in a specific time frame with a specific amount of money. I look at houses I would buy and copy the photos and information down in my notepad. I know that if you win a big lottery at least, you will only recieve 44% of the original amount if you opt for the lump sum. I know that if you wanted to give your friends or family members more than $1 million, you would have to pay 50% in taxes. I know I would be a lot, lot happier if I won the lottery.
I used to have a strong urge to buy things - lots of things - everything! - until I started saving photos of things I see and like online: clothes, furniture, shoes, kitchenware. I have individual folders for the catagories they go in like they're my virtual closets. The shopping urge has ceased since then so now I never buy anything in real life except food and things like that. I feel better about that, like I know something no one else knows.
Sometimes I can't keep my mouth shut, even when I know as I am saying something that it is going to have severe reprocussions for me and for others. That feeling of dread that comes over me feels normal and I welcome it.

I lead people on ALL the time, partly because I find it so hard to reject them, and partly because I love the attention far too much and I'm terrified that if I turn them down then I will have no-one. That's not as slutty as it sounds.

The above 2 things make me a pretty shitty person when it comes to being a) sincere and b) trustworthy. I find lines way too easy to cross and reality becomes lost in some kind of maze of my own creation. Everything is ok until I'm found out and then all kind of shit kicks off.
i get fixated. easily. by the end of the summer i will own all bright eyes and now it's overhead albums. i will then buy a record player, and buy them all on vinyl. i don't see any logic to it, but i also know that i will do it regardless

i have enough money to donate to charities and stuff like that, but instead i sit on it like it'll save my life one day

this thread is the best therapy i've ever found on this board
Hah! I'm loving you guys about the sidewalk rudeness. I thought I was the only one sometimes -- like I'm being too picky. If my boyfriend sees someone not looking or not caring he weaves all over the place to get out of their way. He thinks that's normal.

I'm like, I will stomp my feet so they get a clue someone is there, or just stop and stare at them, not going around, daring them to nudge me or knock me over. Or say "HELLO!!"" when they are blindly staring left while they are walking straight ahead. Most annoying.


I've got a crush on a guy who seriously thinks I am going to fall all over him, but for me it's fun when I can spare the time, and If I have to be somewhere I walk by him without even speaking. also, I am my real self and if he doesn't like it, I'm not changing it.

I've got a guy - I've got a real life that's sane and productive.

When he shows up I feel crazy, like craziness just comes off him in waves cause he's so self-absorbed, and so wealthy that every little thing can be under his control and arbitrary and indulgent.

I'm not sure I'd delve too deep or give a rat's ass...

Ha! free spirit, i do the same thing. And usually when I see a picture of a Bustie I am wrong so wrong!!


I hate it when people read what I post, try to pretend they don't, and then try to "manipulate" what they think of as my issues. I don't have any issues sneaking underneath that I'm scared of, lady. You know who you are. No, I don't have "abandonment" issues -- nice try though. Do you know how obvious you are and that everyone's on to you? You're a nice enough capable enough person -- relax already.

I always wonder why people trying to sleaze think that other people don't see it -- we see it, we hide things from you -- we won't bother to fight you because it's a stupid chore we don't want to bother with and we want to spend our energy on ourselves. simple as that.
Sidewalk rage and road rage. I hate other people on the road! I hate it when somebody goes around me because they want to go way over the speed limit! I hate it when people go *below* the speed limit! I hate pedestrians at Wal Mart who don't even bother to make sure there aren't any inattentive drivers about to barrel into them!
I'm so burned out from academics. But I don't see any other way for it.
I'm sick of those coddamned girls gone wild smut commercials on comedy central, and spike when I'm trying to watch CSI!!!
I want to kill people who don't want to sit where I put them. What the hell is wrong with sitting at a table, huh????

More later
there's a very real possiblity that i am no where near as strong as i think (wish?) i am.
i am tired. oh so tired.
i want to bait a troll with a not-very-nice comment.
i, too, wonder who around me in "real" life is a potential BUSTer
i miss listening to howard stern in the morning when i get ready.
i am depressed today, so i'm going to spend the evening in bed with a movie, rather than prepare for tomorrow morning. i am risking looking like a ginormous dumbass tomorrow so that i may have sanity tonight.
I can and sometimes do work very hard for what I want most. But without fail, I would rather *not* work hard. I really *am* one of those people who would be happy to sit back and let good things fall into my lap, if they would. The only reason I'm working hard right now is because I'm finally, utterly tired of my surroundings and body sucking shit.

If I don't enjoy it and/or it's hard to do, it pisses me off to have to do it when I'd rather be doing anything easy and fun. I am really, truly, thoroughly lazy and everybody I've ever lived with has suffered for it.


I am afraid that several people I love dearly - including the one most likely to read this - will think I'm a bad person and shun me if I'm honest about things I don't believe anymore. I am so afraid of this that I deleted half of what I'd written before I even previewed it because I'm that kind of coward.
Heh. Tx, Mr. Dusty got a card thanking us for some volunteer work we did for his mother's club. He actually got the easier job, and he got a thank you card that was kind of unfortunately phrased as 'you didn't work as hard as Dusty' when she evidently meant 'Dusty had a busier task'. I told him to save it somewhere special because its undoubtedly the one and only time anyone is going to accuse me of working harder than him.
I lurk too much without actually participating too, as I do on several other boards. It's a reflection of the way I am in real life, I think; happy to be on the periphery, just observing rather than participating. It's probably not too healthy to be so disengaged.

All the 'the lounge has really gone downhill' comments make me sad. Like I missed a golden era or something.
I really want to have a boy toy. Some young hot thing who is just completely smitten with me and falls all over himself to be in touch and the like.

I'm pretty much over the relationship thing right now, but boy toy, that's another story.

I'm really pissed off that my desired boy toy is not playing along. Dammit!

I am really bummed because I am having a reaction to the anti depressants I'm on which means I'm gonna have to switch to another one. I don't want to, because all the other ones cause weight gain and loss of libido. I feel like I'd rather itch or be shitty depressed again than have to deal with those two things. I know it's shallow, but that's how I feel at the moment.

Atilla - You know we made an agreement years ago ... you post what you need/want to, and I'll do the same. So if you don't get upset with me for letting out the snarky bitch side some, I won't get upset with you for your own honesty. Besides, as long as you don't say you don't want to be friends anymore, I won't be hurt or look at you any differently for anything you post here. Having a best friend I can talk to and hang out with and who will always be there is what matters most to me - we don't have to believe the same things. We've both changed and grown - I don't expect you to stay stagnant any more than I have. *kisses* (((Sarah)))
funnybird, if it makes you feel any better, there were those who were complaining about the "lounge going downhill" back in 2000, when i joined.

- i'm still searching to find a replacement for bestgalpal who dropped me like a hot potato in college, some 25 years ago. and i'm also yearning to find a clone of j, who instigated our bad breakup 7 years ago. i know their running away had more to do with their issues than mine. but it still hurts. even after all this time. and it makes me wonder if i'm even worthy of having a best friend. i love the good, dear friends i have, but i constantly yearn for a soul mate bestest.

- i am pathologically protective of my son.

- i know i'm a candidate for therapy/meds. but i also know, deep down, that this leopard's spots won't ever change. i can't be bothered working on all that heartrending digging ... it just seems too indulgent for me. better to do what i know helps me cope. except ... i'm a pathological lazyass procrastinator, and always opt for the easiest ways (ie: non-healthy) to cope.
I'm lazy too. I value my free time. I hate hassles that cut into my free time. I think less of people who say they wouldn't know what to do with themselves if they retired (unless they have a truly fascinating job). If I retired, I would: read, hike, paint, sculpt, do crafts, garden, decorate, take classes, cook, learn another language, volunteer, lounge, and travel as much as my funds would allow.

I have sidewalk rage that extends to the grocery store. The aisles have a limited amount of width. Why do you have to walk next to each other at a snail's pace? Why park your cart right next to someone else's parked cart so that no one can pass? Why are people still writing checks? It all irritates me.

I was crossing the street in San Francisco last week, at a crosswalk, with the light in my favor, and some asshole making a right turn not only nearly hit me but actually honked at me. Somehow the absurdity of his ire made the whole thing seem funny to me and I wasn't mad at all.
ditto on everything you wrote.
scary, but true.
thanks for saving my lazi ass from thinking & typing that much. :-)

I don't have any idea what anyone is talking about as to the issues in the lounge, and if I should care, please someone tell me, but I'd prefer to remain safe & stoopid w/ my head in the sand otherwise.

confession: I'd really like to try my hand at painting.
I mean really REALLY. in my heart head and soul I am this incredibly artistic, creative person, but so far as ability w/ my hands,everything I try to create looks like shit. still, there is this little voice in the back of my mind
saying 'what if This is the One Thing you've been looking for? What If?'
logically tho, $$ wise it's not an option as I'm still waiting for the $ to over-haul my flute, something else I am very passionate about but gave up persuing professionally bc that's right- I'm stoopid :-(
still, I hear the oils calling me/
le sigh.
totally OT, but ooooh, freckle, do it if you can! I finally buckled down and took two painting classes last year because I felt the same way (always yearning to paint but painting crap when I tried). And taking a class made such a huge difference. All we did was still life -- not my favorite style, but I really feel like getting a ground in painting what things actually look like in space can help you make conscious decisions about how you want to deviate from reality to express yourself. And there's so much about painting that is a learnable skill -- it's not all just raw talent and inspiration. Anyway, I don't want to assume that you have time to drop everything and take a class (and you already mentioned that $ is a factor), but just wanted to share what a positive experience it was for me. (As a side note, oils are really expensive -- I use inexpensive goauche to practice with.)

re: bust lounge not so cool, me leaving - --
why don't they make it what they want it to be, and why do trolls have to discourage people so - it seems like an excuse. elitism. unless you want to say something deeply long and personal, and then, that is what everyone has FRIENDS for, do you have to constantly announce it?

And I AM intelligent and thoughtful, thanks very much.

I kind of go back and forth on this issue -- I genuinely like some people who talk about it and I don't want them to feel bad, but really.

You all are just not as intelligent hip or fun as we are, so we're leaving, just thought we'd tell you.

oh, and look out for the people ruining things. Whoever THEY would be.
sorry, ya'll, it's just...
I'm reading Community Forum and people are arguing over trolls and how they're dying to have moderators and exclusions and then people who have been harassed the worst are saying "but i'm still staying" and then other people are once again trying to stop the arguments as discussed in the cob thread...

I feel I don't want to criticize people or get into a brouhaha -- but yeah - if you care about the community it makes sense to stick with it, and if you post on a web site at all, no matter what site it is, people may respond rudely or be a gross lecherous guy or someone IRL might realize who you are or someone you befriend online may betray you so it just doesn't make any actual SENSE.

But I seriously don't want to fight about it - i just want to have a fun smart place to go which this is.

Can't change people, can't change and don't want to change what anyone does... but this attempt at control control control is not really gonna work, just so ya know.
free spirit, I'm not that interesting, LOL, but if you PM me, I'll send you a pic.
i watch bright eyes music videos expressly because i know they will reduce me to tears
Thanks, Genghis. I've been torn a lot lately between being too worried about stepping on toes and wanting to just say absolutely everything on my mind, no matter how raw or of course, I know how you feel. I needed to hear that. Besides...remember what I used to say about people being like onions? *g* And I don't foresee *ever* saying I don't want to be friends...because maybe I could handle it, but it would really fucking suck. *hugs*
I think I'm the "other person" of whom TallGirl speaks, and if so, she's right - there are plenty of people who would benefit from the full force of her fury.

But I'd tell her no if I thought I was going to get any of it, despite the fact that I've caused her far more grief than I'd ever confess to here.
Nearly every religious belief I grew up with, I don't hold anymore. The only major tenet I still hold to - even though it's The Big One - doesn't mean the same thing to me as it does to other people who believe it. I am afraid to admit this to anyone who has known me since before mid-2003, because I will always preserve my comfort and avoid conflict rather than be completely honest.

Even so, I am not sorry that I have come to peace with myself on the matter; I no longer feel guilty, or worry that I'm going to be punished for it, in this life or any other.

I am more than a little angry that (now that I've heard what my best friend had to say, and I should have known anyway), of the people whose opinion on my life is actually important to me, the only ones who may treat me differently because of this...are my parents.
Today, for a second time, a very attractive co-worker and I were mistaken for a couple - despite the fact that we are both attached (me, married; he, long-term live-in) in closed relationships to others. When it happened the first time, it was funny. This time...I am deeply pleased.

I'm discussing a semi-open relationship with my husband. Neither of us remembers who was the first to mention it.

If GB and I were semi-open, the hot co-worker is the first person I'd go for. If there was no GB, I'd be all over him already.
The older I get, the more "outlandish" things I'm willing to say or do. This both terrifies and pleases me.
TX - People ARE like onions; the more time you spend with them, the more likely they'll make you cry.

Oh, confession: I just spent $50 to buy a CD of Benjamin Orr's album "The Lace" so I could add "Stay the Night" to my MP3 collection. Jesus. Shoot me.
there are things i think and really should be confessed that i won't say aloud or even write down.

as immature as it is, a big part of me still subscribes to 'it's no good if anyone else likes it'. therefore, i refuse to listen to my really good, really obscure music in the car with my friends, lest they decide they like it, too
I hate people when they need me, although I'm terribly needy myself.

I honestly don't think I can create or get out of a depression unless I find someone to make me happy.

I believe my art will perpetually suck until somebody loves me.

I feel like most of my life has been and will be a complete waste.

I dream about getting married and having kids.

I don't think either of those things will happen, and am scared shitless about the point of living.

I'm a tease and a disappointment.
i Almost pulled off a reaonably pleasant four day family visit. instead of bitchy i was just quiet and moody. my poor mom, it's not her fault that i let her drive me positively bonkers. or that her arrival happened to coincide perfectly with a wicked case of pms. drr, i'm a bad daughter.
freespirit, I responded to your PM...let me know if you don't receive it
Pepper, I totally understand. My mom thinks I'm really insane because I'm so incredibly moody around her. Four days is a long trip!

I feel like my art lately is actually the best I've ever made. I'm really excited about it but I'm too afraid to show it to anybody because the content is disturbing.

I was raised to accomodate people, no matter how ridiculous their requests and although I know it's wrong, I still have a hard time saying no to anyone.
ohmygosh, I just chased away a door to door sales guy, who had come by here before, selling something different last time, but this time I was rude to him, told him to not come back again, that I had said that Last Time too & I Really Mean It, shooed him away and all, and now all I can think is, what if that was God? that joan osborne song is playing through my head, freaking me the heck out right now.
I am a terrible terrible person.

((((((busty confessors))))))
God would have closed the sale. You're in the clear.
I have a small furrow between my brows and every once in awhile I briefly contemplate botox.
doodle, me too, me too!!
Sometimes I like to have a siesta.
I tell my partner I've been REALLY BUSY all day...
I am trying to convince my mother in law to drink.
just to T R Y the bacardi rum punch in my fridge.
I think she's weakening.

I am going to hell.

alligator, you think really?
Yes, you are going to Hell for getting your mother-in-law to drink.

Or did you mean that salesman/God thing?

Confession: I want to steal things. Often.
Confession: I have the password to my exboyfriend's email. Every once in awhile I'll punch it in just to see how his life has been... And I don't really feel guilty about it, either.
I smoked the other night. It's been five & a half years. They dropped a statewide smoking ban on Saturday & I smoked me a whole Parliament that night out of spite for the Man.

Freckleface, I used to invite the door-to-doors in to discuss it over a bath. Salespeople, religious wackos, you name it. Nobody would ever take me up on the Mister Bubble & the JW's/Mormons stopped coming to our house pretty much in perpetuity. Goddess commended me on being smart & offered me a management position when I die. Of course, hell has better benefits & hotter guys, so I'm still mulling it over.
I frequently think I only maintain a "relationship" with my father because I'm financially better off for it. He pays my rent, I spend my student loan on shoes. I feel it's my debt, I might as well spend it and live better in the process. Which I realise is deplorable, as well as idiotic.

I am scared of failure, but I am equally terrified by success.

I miss falling asleep with someone else in my bed.
I'm secretly pleased that I'm a terrible driver. I feel like it's a personality trait, not a public safety risk.
i just realized that 'academia nuts' was a play on 'macademia nuts'.
she wouldn't do it. said she was afraid of both messing w/her blood pressure medicine,and that she'd like it too much & want to do it again.
this is a genuinely GOOD woman. better than I'd ever be in a bazzillion years of living or lives.
my mr is horrified beyond words that I even brought it up with her & gets pissy at me when I talk about it to him now, but I am rather pleased that I got her to even give it any serious contemplation.
sympathy for the devil anyone?

alligator, I used to steal things (long ago confessed in the sinbin) and thought I was well past & over it, but I just noticed a utensil in my drawer w/ a eatery stamp on it that I have zero recollection of snagging. makes me wonder if my fingers weren't sticker than I realised or if I haven't passed the bug on to the fam.

mornington, student loan for education or shoes?
duh. one good shoe really can change your life :-)
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