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Second confession: My bdays for the past two years have been the two best. I loved them. They were amazingly wonderful and I won't ever forget them.

i'm so glad you had good birthdays; that can make a whole year. even though all the people around me at my 27th are no longer in my life, that was hands down the best birthday ever.

oh, and ch? we love you!

eta confessions:

-i had a one night stand with the boy i should have kept in touch with, and kept in touch with the one i should have had a one night stand with.

-oh, and that was my first one night stand. ever. i was told i'd get a girl scout badge for that.

-i'm drinking too much red wine and discovering sleater-kinney, as suggested by someone in the music thread. all this in lieu of doing some Very Important Studying.

-i'm seriously considering a bust name change.
if you must, catlady, i always kinda loved you (and your name)

confession:i miss the crushgirl's smart assy comments on fb. i know she would have had a lot to say about the stupid stuff i posted. i know it's for the best, but i miss being a foil/having a foil. [commence to head hanging]

confession:looks like i'm going to be sending off one of my favorite paintings in a few days. i'm happy for having more space, and the inspiration that comes with a living room that needs a huge mural painted on it. i haven't really painted a huge painting in years, and i miss it terribly.

confession: thank you all for putting up with my schleprock routine lately. i'm hoping things are going to start looking up. :/
QUOTE(crazyoldcatlady @ Oct 19 2009, 03:37 PM) *
-oh, and that was my first one night stand. ever. i was told i'd get a girl scout badge for that.

Yes, you get a girl scout badge AND entry into the Bustie Secret Society Club. wink.gif

You know cocl, you could always come to visit me and I will make it a memorable birthday for you. And I don't mean that to sound as sleazy as it just did. Heh.

confession: I've never had a one night stand or a Zipless Fuck. unsure.gif
I do so love Secret Societies. sad.gif

cocl: I second loving your name, but have toyed w/ the same idea of changing also, and this time Not because of the dingo.
if only we were each allowed say.. up to 3 names under one account to use dependant upon our moods.
right from that readers would have a clue as the writers mindset based on the name written from.

gt: is this The' Painting you told me about ? I hope you upped the s/h fee's tremendously for the owner so it's not a financial loss to you.
- did I miss something that happened w/ crushgirl? ((((((((gt))))))) babygirl, it was meant to be if it didn't work out so riddle what can be learned BESIDES thinking you are meant to be alone. you have too much everything to offer a woman and it'd be plain silly to expect that to be just any woman w/ a sassy wit.
.. it took me over 2 hours to find the shark tooth for frecklette on the beach the other day. 2 Hours! and the tooth is maybe the size of a contact lens cut into a small triangle mixed in w/ jillions & jillions of other shells & beach junk. but it was worth it. the look on her face was all I needed for thanks.
apply That as comparrison for your search babe and even if you don't find your tooth right away, you can still enjoy the search.

tree: really?! I get a most specific image of your jewlery showing through your clothes.. I just can't believe that no one there told you! then again, none of My friends told me either & it was plain as day- literally. rolleyes.gif

= let's all make a Lounge Promise that if ever any of us are together IRL and that sorta thing happens, we'll tell. - please? =
confession: I am tired and stressed out and I feel like I'm going to fail my marketing midterm tomorrow because I feel like I'm not absorbing anything that I'm reading and I just want to cry. Oh, and to make matters worse I'm on here when I shouldn't be.
I'll make that promise, freckle.


Confession: I want to go hang out with the potheads in my building tonight but I'm too shy to go up to them now. And I've been using a magic 8 ball to decide whether or not to go out at night.

I also came very close to walking out of my job today because a coworker threatened me and I just couldn't take anymore crap from this place. My first impulse in an uncomfortable situation is to run and right now I am fighting that impulse. If I had the money I would be in a hotel room in the closest large city about now.
hehe, well, in my family's defense, when I showed up in the sheer camisole was the day AFTER the wedding/reception, and I just stayed a half hour or so to say good bye. Everybody was pretty hung over.

And the truck stop part??? Wellll...I'd have gotten a naughty thrill if not for all the families and small children dressed in their Sunday Best.

Confession: Quite a bit of the time I don't feel like my job coordinates with my Bustie name-I mean, ozone depleting refrigerants? Power plants?

Confession: I've had too many one night stands.

Confession: I'm developing a fairly hot crush on one of the guys I work with. We've been flirting a bit. We both have a pretty crude, outrageous sense of humor and we feed off each other. Heh. Not to mention he's really, really mechanically smart-I go to him all the time with questions. And he actually takes me seriously and doesn't try to "dumb down" his explanations like a lot of guys do when they're talking to women about mechanical things.

Confession: I develop crushes too easily, yet I've never posted in the crush thread.

Confession: My senior partner called me "the cryostat bitch" yesterday. Because he got a work order to go fix one and he doesn't want to do it so he was trying to pawn it off on me...I looked at it and said, "but it's got YOUR name on it". "Yeah, but YOU'RE the cryostat bitch!" So I called him the "lyophilizer asshole". I know he said it in fun-that's just the way we talk to each other. Maybe "cryostat bitch" should be my new Bustie name.
Confession: I have not had any one night stands either...and I am sure that random make-outs don't count. I guess that's more par for the course if you wait until your twenties to finally get it on! Are there any other secret society's that I might be able to join instead? I am really good at keeping secrets and am willing to bake lots of yummy treats for the other members of the group wink.gif

Confession: I am trying really hard to take a positive stance when I think about my life (as opposed to my usual somewhat pessimistic thinking) and I think that it might actually be starting to work. I don't want to speak too soon but my mood has been much better as of late!
confession:i'm helping a dear friend get her bar ready to open on halloween, and i'm loving it. she's always been very good to me, and the opportunity to help her, well, it makes me so happy i could cry. i just love being there for her, in a way that shows how much i appreciate all her encouragement and kindness. wub.gif

confession: i really love being a cheerleader for my friends. i can never quite see the silver lining in my life, but i adore pointing out theirs, and talking them up. if i like someone, i just think the are dazzlingly awesome.
if you must, catlady, i always kinda loved you (and your name

well shit, i can't ignore a gt endorsement! i just feel like i'm not the same catlady i was 5 years ago...

...although, tree, if you don't take cryostat bitch, i'm swooping in on it wink.gif

Yes, you get a girl scout badge AND entry into the Bustie Secret Society Club.

You know cocl, you could always come to visit me and I will make it a memorable birthday for you. And I don't mean that to sound as sleazy as it just did. Heh.

i cackled to myself reading this! let's go slut it up midwest style for the inaugural BSSC meeting.
QUOTE(crazyoldcatlady @ Oct 20 2009, 03:43 PM) *
...although, tree, if you don't take cryostat bitch, i'm swooping in on it wink.gif

dang, now I really do want to change my moniker. I wish you could take your history with you and not create a whole new profile. <pouts>
[sigh] now i wanna change my name. do you see what you've done, cat lady?

but then ketto did it, and she survived. hmmmmm.
I've been here since around 02 or 03, I can't really remember. It seemed like there were so many times I would have to start over because of the whole "a dingo ate my username" issue that kept cropping up. Personally I will probably never change my name because it's from a White Stripes song and I love their music. I like the fact that I can refer to the boy as candycane_boy because he's a crazy White Stripes fan as well.

confession: my feet smell. I don't know why.
It's true, I missed not being able to take my history with me too though. sad.gif Mine was a necessary change because it was too identifiable.
For about an hour this morning I seriously thought I was going blind. This morning I put in new contact lenses, exercised pretty hard, and then was walking around thinking, hmm, are my lenses in? Why is my vision blurrier than usual? Did I burst a blood vessel? AM I GOING BLIND? Is my worst nightmare coming true? (because that is, like, one of my big fears ever of all time, which is my confession) I called the eye doc's office in a panic to see if I could come in today. They said yes, but are you sure it's your eyes? Maybe a lens is defective. Well, sure enough, I pop an old one back in and voila, bluriness gone. I'm not going blind after all. wink.gif But I was SO WORRIED for a good hot... hour. Twenty years of wearing contacts and just now I get a defective lens.

ETA: Count me in on the wanting to change my name camp.
Dudes, all you gotta do is go away for like 3 years, forget your password and then you have no choice BUT to change your name hence pant = the artist formerly known as surly = me.
I like my name. I think it suits me.

I hate penguins. They're disgusting.
confession: after lurking & reading the threads for awhile, I got my name idea from heavns2mergatroid, who isn't here any longer. (or is she?? )
I feel kinda bad, guilty, but I really do identify so much w/ my freckles.. even my Dad said recently after not seeing me for a year " -- did you Always have that many freckles?! " and then he grinned at me.

anyway: h2mt, if you're out there somewhere- thank you & I'm sorry.

confession: at the end of the weekend I had to throw out 3/4ths of a peperidge farm 3 layer chocolate cake and damnit- now I want it back!
Confession: I just filled out an application form to re-home my dog with a Basenji rescue. I am heartbroken, but I know it's for the best. sad.gif
Aw, damn, Polly. Those dogs are great, but they can be a handful. They're almost like cats with their whole aloof thing, but then they get dog curious & can tear shit up one side & down the other.

There was a TAL about a family & their Basenji. They bought it because they don't really bark, slobber, or shed, but the family didn't take into account how much attention/stimulation they need or how standoffish they can be. So they took it to some farm to live. And that Basenji? Was back at their house in a matter of days. Tenacious little bugger hoofed it like, fifty miles or something to get back home.
I know, LeBoy and I laughed so hard we cried at that TAL.

Our problem is that his Cushing's Disease causes frequent urination. LeBoy and I both work, so he's crated during the day. He has a "litter tray" (it's like a grate over a pan with newspapers) that keeps him from sitting in it (or drinking it, as he did before we got the pan <insert pukey face here>), but it's not the greatest option and he really needs a home where he can be outside in a backyard and with someone who can let him out as often as he needs to go. It's just not fair to him to keep him in there all day while we're at work and then we're less than thrilled to have him out in the house when we get home. We've tried tweaking his meds, we've tried controlling his water doesn't matter. You'll take him outside, he'll pee what seems like everything and then 10 minutes later he's peeing again, on the rug. sad.gif

ETA: I was really resistant to the whole thing at first. LeBoy just seemed to be kind of flippant about it, like he'd push the issue when he was pissed off (no pun intended) about the dog, and we talked and I said, "Look, we have to think about this with the same moral consideration as if I were pregnant and we were deciding whether we should give the baby up for adoption." and we came to the conclusion that this really is the best thing.
Oh Polly, I am so sorry. (((((((polly and leboy))))))))
Y'know, if I lived closer to you, I'd take that dog off yer hands, Polly. I have a BIG backyard & I work from home, I could let him out to his heart's content. And ya'll could come & visit!
I'd drive half-way to meet you,'re still in KS, right? You can't resist this face.
I am in love with the sirus radio station 1st wave. all the 80's I'll ever need.
oh god, polly, i'd never be able to leave the house, for fear of missing all that cuteness.
Oh, great googly moogly. What a DOLL! That is one special face, Polly!

Confession: I am a sucker for baby anything. Except for baby penguins because they are nasty wee creatures.
Crap- when I filled out the form, I avoided the questions about the breeder. See, my friends who gave him to us said the breeder seemed kinda shady, a little "puppy mill-ish" and that's why they didn't send him back to her (this was all in hindsight- they were naive when they got him, so didn't know any better), even though their contract says that if they ever wanted to give him up, the breeder would have the first option to take him. I actually have a copy of his AKC papers with the breeder's info on it, but I just omitted that and said I didn't know where he came from.

Well, I stupidly put my friends names down as who we got them from...apparently there's a big database out there or something and the rescue people replied and said, "we found the breeder he was purchased from and I've forwarded your information on to her." Well, if I get any bad vibes from her, and if she wants him back, I'm not sure what I'll do. unsure.gif
it's the good maude's sign that you're supposed to keep him tongue.gif
polly: you & ap seriously need to get together on this.
ap: is it really reasonable for you to take him?
zeppy our rescue is literally thriving and clearly starting to feel more secure and is being accepted well into the "pack" (Bella & Blue) & it's a beautiful thing to witness.
That is one cute dog polly.

I'm happy enough with my screenname too--it applies yet is also generic, which works well with the greater internetz.

Confession 1: I have spent almost 2 days on a 10 minute powerpoint interview presentation and haven't done any of the other work I need to do.

Confession 2: I don't hate powerpoint as much as I did, which is proof that its dumbing down over-simplifying format is already poisoning my brain...
I confess, humanist's avatar makes me laugh. I stopped reading the onion a long time ago but I'll never forget that man's face.
confession: I want the mr to leave for a few days tdy so I can buy a replacement peperidge farm 3 layer chocolate cake & eat it all by myself.

confession: I am stuffed w/ pizza & cinamon sticks from pizza hut but am eyeballing the twix bar I have in my purse.

confession: I stole 4 twix bars last night from the snack buffet where frecklette was babysitting.
I mean- yah they were out there for everyone, but I was only chauferring frecklette, not actually sitting on any children and besides that I'm pretty sure it was the honor system of 'take one.' cool.gif
Chewed through a whole box of Trident gum last night, 18 sticks, carefully timing/ assessing when to add a new one for the sweetness value and when to take them all out and start a new ball. Yes, I could have stopped. But at a certain point it becomes almost scientific.

confession: i want to slack, paint and draw all day, but i need to help my friend get her bar together. i know i will feel good doing it, but.... i wanna help.

confession: i just got a reply from my friend's beau, her business partner, i sent him an email with a stop gap dj set from craigslist, that will tide them over till they got something better. the two (passable, but crappy) turntables and mixer were going for 300. his reply?

that's more than i wanted to spend, but it looks like a good deal.

here is the confessin' part: i wrote him an email back that was polite as possible, but i have never wanted to cry, scream, and then throttle a person in my life. $300 fucking dollars? are you fucking joking me? ONE turntable a 1200-- the industry standard, costs $800 new. you do know, a pair of 1200s, can be found in even the CHEAPEST FUCKING DIVE with a dj set up. YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. [HEAD DESK]

I am having a very, very sad night tonight. Almosst where I want to die. But not quite. But close.

No, I'm sugar coating it. I do want to die, right at this moment, I do.

It'll go away by morning though.

I feel so hopeless. And so angry. And so sad. And so overwhelmed.
sending you my # via pm bc I am crying for you..
(((((((((((((((((((tree)))))))))))))))))))))))) sad.gif

now I feel like what I was going to post is very shallow. so I'll leave it for later.

(((((((((tree))))))) i hope you are still feeling better, chickie. i wub you! wub.gif
confession: i'm beginning to think lady gaga is really marilyn manson in a disguise. i've never seen them in the same place at the same time.

confession: i don't get the appeal of lil' wayne. it's not that he's ugly as sin, most rappers are. (really. jay z? biggie?) with the exception of maybe one or two songs, i just don't think he's that good. but then, in general, i used to love h.e.r. [le sigh].

also? i want donuts or pancakes.


....and yes, i know it's 4 am local time. so? i want my yummies.

gt - just inhaled a giant crepe with strawberries, banana, ice cream and nutella on McDougal-- sending you a contact high.

re: LW - "to be the best you have to dress like the best, eat like the best, smell like the best" - quoting an interview from memory, but no kidding. a self-made man
I am late with this, but am hoping you are feeling better chica (((((tree)))))
confession: the Anarchist invited me out to dinner and I said yes, but then texted him that I couldn't because it "doesn't feel right." Texted him. wacko.gif

confession: I feel unbelievably annoyed at myself over how naive and stupid I was to ever allow the Anarchist that much control over my BAND (nevermind my goddamned confused, trusting heart).

confession: it feels soooo good to realize, in this very moment, that the niche I can - and AM - carving for myself and the band in the music business is actually as unique and true to me as his vision of the niche for me and the band was not. We always fought the most over the things he thought were "best" for me. And I know firing his ass really was the right decision.

confession: I can't help but notice the symbolism of my body's most recent physical ailment: it started in my right shoulder and arm as a blistering ache that kept turning tingly and numb, but (according to my wonderful new young lady doctor) it turned out to be neck muscle spasms that gave me symptoms all along that quadrant of my body, including a month-long headache. It aligned perfectly with the moment of losing the Anarchist, through into taking action to push the band forward again, without him. I thought I had lost my right arm, when first losing the Anarchist. But in fact, he turned out to be a pain in the neck who gave me a big headache!

Confession: Craving Oreos, Halloween candy, and ice cream. Hell, all three together. Got some bad news about my career path, and really just want to eat. I don't want Mcgeek to come home, and find me crying.

Confession: Lady Gaga annoys the shit out of me.

(((doodlebug))) - that last confession on your list is so cool and empowering. wow.

confession: I have an issue with getting excited about something everyone else is preparing for. I feel bad being the only person who hasn't dressed up cuz it's like I'm slighting everyone else's efforts by not putting an effort, so I end up tossing some skimpy outfit on and saying I'm a Russian mail-order bride. (how does showing skin relieve the feeling of having slipped out of the ranks of humanity again?)... But I have such a celebrator's block to getting psyched on fun that's scheduled and planned en masse. Part of it, for Halloween, is that I don't know American culture that well so I can't really go for that dramatic irony of understatement (or whatever bullshit I flatter myself is mah steez;)... But New Year's is the worst, such a pressure to feel that one second zeeeooooom over your head and share in the elated feeling everyone else is swaying with... Burning man? Don't even start with me. The deh-speration.
That said, watched Solaris last night, the Tarkovsky one ( sometimes I'll loop a movie in a small viewing window and listen to it and pull it to the front to watch a scene once in a while but it generally just rolls many times under/ next to the window I'm working on and feeds me subliminally. So Solaris relates to the subject I'm working on, is in Russian (not my most first OR most active language - so it fades in and out of my awareness and I don't take it all in --love that selective ADD it gives me! but I ramble so...) So - the main guy talks about Tolstoy having a problem with the fact that it's impossible to love the human race as a whole. "Because we love what we can lose". Then he adds, looking at the weird boiling water of a sentient planet they've landed on trying to talk to them, torturing them in its efforts to play, "so I guess we may be finally the generation that can love humanity as a whole".
So yeah. Maybe I'll end up dressing up after all, just shoot at random, and no skin... Like, Big Bird, or Evil Smokefunnel from Lost. Yay?
thanks, everybody. I was in a very, very low place last night, but a lovely Bustie talked me up.

Confession: after working overtime tomorrow, me and two co-workers are going to go get stoned. I'm looking forward to it, because at 41, I rarely get stoned in company anymore. (bear isn't in to it).
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