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Look at you! Showing your amazing strength more and more all the time. You're an amazing woman.

Freck, good for you! I mean, about the PP stuff ... not the fantasizing about mrried men thing ... although there's no harm in fantasies! Nothing wrong with enjoying the scenery as long as you don't walk on the grass, ya know? wink.gif

Confession: As many of you know now, I joined Crackbook last night. It seems to be the only way to really find out what's happening in the creative community in my area, so it became a necessary evil. Plus, Sheff joined. Siiiiiigh.

Confession: I am sooooooooooooo glad I can post whatever the hell I want here on Bust! I suspect I will be censoring myself a lot over on FB.
rosev, that's the way it is for I say anything but over there I censor myself a bit. Oh, well. I really should take the time to sit down and actually sort my "friends" into groups.
Good to have you on crackbook, RV! Seriously, use the privacy settings posted in this thread by CH and COCL. It works wonders with your friends list. I give Busties all access on FB.
rose, I definitely end up censoring myself on FB. Mainly it's because I have family members on there (mostly cousins). The only thing that bugs me is that most of the time I only want to block people from certain messages that I post, not all of them. Also, now that you're on FB people can track you down which kind of sucks. But there's nothing wrong with denying a friend request.
Star, I'm going to tackle the privacy stuff today. I don't plan on getting too terribly personal there. Some people seem to post status updates every day, but I can't see myself doing that yet. My life is too boring to inflict the details on anyone other than Busties. biggrin.gif

CCG, my only family member on my friend list so far is one of my brothers (and I don't mind him reading all my shit). However, I think my mom is on FB. Gotta figure out if I'll have to block some things from her or not. Probably not since I plan on keeping things basic. We shall see.
Count me on on those who censor themselves on FB. My profile is open to everyone.....mainly b/c I've decided to use FB as a promotional tool for my music. I have co-workers, fellow musicians, local politicians, and everything in between on my friends list, and there's always been a limit to what I'm willing to share about my life with these folks and the world in general. I'm not really into posting my life online, and when I am......well, that's what I have the Lounge for! smile.gif Plus I don't have the internets at home anymore, so I'm not always there to monitor FB when shit explodes.....
dunno. fb isn't a very personal space like the lounge or a blog is. even some of the surveys that are passed around i don't fill out because they personal in a way that i find grating. really? why do you need to know my favorite toothpaste? i dunno how personal telling people you are going camping is, but that seems to be the level of self disclosure on FB. it's pretty superficial for most people i think.

FB, for me at least, is more for making loopy comments, or posting links to loopy stuff i like. walking bitch is a riot, as is jemistrulyoutragous, and aural of course. all people i know from here who make my day, and post stuff i'd never find. i LOVE posts by people who are just sharing their passions-- bunny posting about books/bookstores, turbojenn's yummy food, chicago busties and their food trips, anna's film reviews, or my friend gogo berzerker's music links. it's just sharing interests, and perhaps i'm a bitch about it, but my favorite FB peeps just make me smile.

everyone else... gets hidden/ignored.
like people who post just promo stuff. it's a pet peeve, and why i HATED myspace. i hate being inundated with gigs.--i have a couple of dj friends, and if they didn't post funny stuff or links to videos/music they loved, i'd have blocked them. i don't need to hear about every gig they have every 2-3 days. same with my artist friends. they post about artists they like, or art techniques. but if you don't participate, you get blocked. i don't like ads, even if they are from people i know, and 100% promo seems like you are trying to sell me something, and to me, it's kinda obnoxious, and gross.

i do have family on FB and they are on the most censored setting, but i don't pay much attention to them. my family are all bible thumpers, so if they are offended... meh. i'm offended by their constant bible quoting, and they love posting quotes on fb...
I've always been a little alarmed by people who put *everything* on crackbook, like their address, phone number, etc. Crackbook is a hackers delight...

I'm with GT, my crackbook page, I make comments, but things more private in nature get sent via PM. I enjoy crackbook so I can put really, *really* bizarre status updates up.

Sure there are pics, but not of me at anyone's wedding or whatnot.

The most personalized thing I have on there is my personalized licence plate, and even then anyone driving behind me can see that.
I find that facebook can be good for communicating about random things, especially with other people at my university (makes sense since facebook used to be excusively for university students). A lot of times I'll just throw out a question like "Does anybody know when we can access our exam marks?" It's easier than emailing everyone.

I still don't understand how people can waste hours on fb though. Unless you spend all day doing the mindless quizzes ("what date will you get married?", "Which muppet are you?", etc) then it's not much of a time waster.

However, I've gotten so used to logging onto facebook daily that I'm giving it up for this week. Of course it helps that I'm back home right now and going to be busy with my friend's wedding. But still, I just wanted to test myself to see if I could go a full week without facebook.

Um, anyway here's a confession: last night I went out for Mexican food with my brother and ended up drinking the better part of a litre of margaritas. He said to order a jug for both of us but he only had a few drinks and then I was left with the rest. Ohhhhhhh boy.
confession: I just found out that our local branch of PP is going to be offering abortions in a few months. (it's a brand new clinic). I AM Pro Choice, but it still bothers me a little. like I don't want to let myself think too much or too closely about it. maybe as long as I don't see anyone Obviously Pregnant coming in for one, I'll be ok but, sigh. does this make me a bad person? or that I ought not to volunteer there?
there is no doubt in my mind that a woman's body is HER's TO DECIDE OVER ( a slogan for a sign I already thought up was " DON'T REPO OUR REPRO !").
anna k
The pics that are up there on my facebook profile are mostly solo pictures, because I didn't want to put any pics of me with anyone if I didn't have their permission. A friend has a picture of me with her that isn't too flattering, and I posted a pic of me with my siblings. That and I don't like being photographed much anyway, so I just found whatever I thought looked best.

Aww thanks girltrouble! I love seeing your posts on FB too, you find some interesting music clips and are both hilarious and insightful.
freck, I think that even though most of us here are pro choice, actual abortions are still a sticky issue. I don't think it's a fun situation for anyone. I know that right now if I were to get pregnant that I would have an abortion. However, I think I would be pretty depressed about it (of course that's why I try to prevent getting pregnant in the first place). I would just try to look at it from the point of view that at least these women know they are not ready to have a baby and rather than bringing a baby into this world when they're not ready, they'll wait until they are.

Also, doesn't the US ban abortions after one trimester? I don't think anyone really looks pregnant in the first trimester. I could be wrong though.
Aunt Flow just landed on my hips like a ton of bricks. Uuuuuuuuugh! The paaaaaaaaaain! Cramping and sharp stabby shit. It's been a long time since I've had a period this painful.

See, that's an example of something I would only post here n Bust. biggrin.gif Sheff seems to be much more into the whole FB thing than I am at this point. He has posted status updates and posted a couple photos (including a great one of the 2 of us with my Cousin T). I still don't feel like doing much there, but I've enjoyed reading most of my friends' posts & commenting on them.

Freck, I agree with CCGirl. Remember that these women are in a situation that they didn't plan and did not ever wish to experience, but they're doing the best they can with a difficult situation. Nobody ever seems happy to get an abortion. They may be grateful that they have the option and may feel some relief once it's over, but that's different. I suspect your clinic will only perform 1st trimester abortions, so if you see anyone who appears Obviously Pregnant, they're bound to be there for a different reason.

CCGirl, the other night I wanted margaritas SO DAMN BADLY that I probably could have drunk you under the table! We all have our days when we overindulge a bit. Don't feel so bad about it.
you know CCG I don't honestly know what the cut-off here in the US is yet. I'm supposed to get a tour of the facility when I go in Thursday night & no doubt will get loaded down w/ all their info so I can better advocate for them (as well as deal accurately with harrassers). there are a plethora of volunteer opportunities currently available & I told the coordinator I'd like to sort of float around initally & see where I might fit best, but I think I can really see myself teaching sex-ed classes & the like from the job decriptions they sent me.
part of what really drives me to this is girls like frecklette's bff T, the one I tried to help and lost. she's so vulnerable & at risk.

.... I think my heart conflict comes into play the strongest when I look at and think about frecklette.
she was "unplanned" but is such a fantastic joy. the mama in me has a hard time getting past that.

interesting enough frecklette told me tonight she thought maybe she'd like to volunteer there w/ me after all, until I told her they were going to start providing That Service and then she said No Thanks, w/ a sweet ' I'm sorry Mama.' but I'm so PROUD of her for knowing her own values & told her so & to not ever apologise.
we laughed then bc I told her she can protest there & I'll wave to her from behind my lines, lol.

rv: maybe you could down if we ever hold an big event ey? smile.gif

= sorry for being so o/t here=
mmmmm liquor....
Freck, just do what makes you comfortable. I bet they understand that some of their services are too intimate and emotional for their new volunteers. I'm sure they'll appreciate whatever help you can offer.

GT, Sheff and I replenished the liquor supply about a week ago. What'll you have? A Buttery Nipple perhaps? wink.gif
Confession: I just perpetrated the most cray cray bullshit story to catch the plane I was too busy dicking off to leave for on time & succeeded.
Confession: I feel like my life is so different than some of my friends from childhood almost to the point that I don't think I relate to them anymore.
AP, whatever you have to do to get on the plane.

Star, in what way are things different?

Confession: I NEED RED MEAT!!!! I really hope Sheff doesn't have to work too late tonight because I NEED him to stop by our favorite burger place on his way home. If I don't get a cheddar bacon burger & sweet potato fries in my system, I may gnaw one of his feet off for supper.

Confession: Heavy periods make me crave meat somethin' FIERCE. Most of the time I'm kinda an accidental vegetarian, but all that changes when Aunt Flow arrives.
QUOTE(roseviolet @ Sep 2 2009, 03:54 PM) *

Confession: I NEED RED MEAT!!!! I really hope Sheff doesn't have to work too late tonight because I NEED him to stop by our favorite burger place on his way home. If I don't get a cheddar bacon burger & sweet potato fries in my system, I may gnaw one of his feet off for supper.

Confession: Heavy periods make me crave meat somethin' FIERCE. Most of the time I'm kinda an accidental vegetarian, but all that changes when Aunt Flow arrives.

I can sympathize. I've heard it's because the bleeding makes you low on iron, so you crave red meat. Yum!

I hope Sheff still has both feet tomorrow!
Not to worry, Polly. My belly is now full of meaty goodness & all of Sheff's appendages are accounted for & remain attached.
I'm sure Sheff appreciates that as well.
RV/Polly that's funny. I rarely ever crave burgers, but I went to a bar yesterday for lunch and had a bacon cheeseburger. I woke up this morning, and had started my period.

Confession: Craving double chocolate chip ice cream like crazy!

Confession: I wish I could get into my new Mad Men dress. Too bad it's a size 14!

Confession: I'm worried this star-gazing party tonight will be all academic, and Mcgeek will be kissing ass. I just hope there's good food.

confession: Hubby was watching college football in the other room. I hear the band playing a familiar tune and I go barreling in asking " Was the band playing the theme song from Dune? "

they were

I knew it!

I am officially a total dork and proud of it!
I went to Planned Parenthood tonight & made signs for them that they are holding out at the intersection to let people know they are there & Open now.
after I was given the Big Tour & the clinic is fantastic! that it's a Green Build is the least of it. it's all very high tech & modern but yet has a relaxed, laid back kind of vibe at the same time.
I was shown the Procedure Rooms in the Surgical Wing (no furniture or equipment in there yet) & said a little blessing for good chi- good life- to come to those who enter there.
I learned from the website that they perform procedures up to 24 weeks w/ the words 'fetal demise.'
yet I don't see anyone potentially in that situation as selfish but as desperate & scared.
I may work at a table at a festival in town in a few weeks, but spoke to the woman about possible becoming a Client Advocate; someone who greets the patients when they 1st come in & more or less guides them through things to start out with (such as dealing w/ any protesters outside) in a quiet, supportive manner.
this still does feel very right to me.
maybe even moreso now that I've been there.

misslady: is Dune like that Tusk song?
Which Dune score? Revell or Tyler? The Lynch version had music by, um, Toto. And the Bros. Eno & Daniel Lanois did the prophecy theme.
It was the from the Lynch version and I wanna say it was the prophecy theme.
But it was for sure music from Dune and it sounded great with a full band but just seemed weird at a college football game where most people would not get that reference.
I'm in a mood.


I went to a Reiki session and it brought up a whole fuck lot of emotion. I want to go again, but I'm a wee bit worried.
CH: Reiki can work that way. Good for you, but revealing. I felt totally vulnerable afterwards. Go again when you feel ready.


After years of hard work, I have landed a dream job and am about to receive professional recognition. Yet instead of being happy and revelling in this, I am consistently worried about the mister, who has been under stress since June, or before. I want to write much more; suffice to say I should be happy and proud of something I've finally accomplished, but instead I fear his stress-related moods and think of ways to avoid them.

I want to bask in well-earned success, and get on with my new job. He downplayed my stress or concerns, but I'm subject to his.

There is so much more I want to write about this. Currently I feel apprehension, for when he comes in from his (demanding) job and as if I need to hide everything that is important to me. This brings up lots of questions.

This may be the tip of an iceberg. I love my life and worked hard to create it, and am angry that I have to downplay my joy in my success. This is so abbreviated, here, but I'm starting to get really concerned. I have felt my life isn't mine for a while; now that it's all come together I still feel that way; lately I feel my success means nothing to him except the inconvenience of moving house.

There's more to it, but I am derailing... my confession is that this is all inarticulated, unsaid to him...but he can't listen right now. When can he?
I humbly bow to the astounding level of Geek Cred in this thread.

That's really awful. I'm so sorry. I know it's not much, but whenever you want to celebrate your joy, you can turn to us. We'll be your cheerleaders! We'll get out the fuzzy pom-poms and everything!

(((((((CH)))))))) Sorry to hear you had such a rough time. Be nice to yourself tonight, okay?

Freck, glad to hear you had a good experience at PP.
syb: totally what rv said. WE are Super PROUD of you!! we KNow you've busted your ass and earned where you are now. look in the mirror & tell that amazing woman : " Helllll Yah I'm good and I 1000% DESERVE the good things coming to me & so will CELEBRATE Myself for that. - Yah ME!!!!! laugh.gif "
cheesy but sometimes entirely neccessary bc when your loved one doesn't cheer for you- SOMEBODY has to !
(the mr & I have battled over that same issue multiple times & yes it is hard when you outshadow him but you know Syb- that's HIS PROBLEM to deal with and get-over. seriously. if the situation was reversed- would it be so troubling ? just sayin'.) (((((((sybarite)))))))

((((((ch)))))))) I have wanted to try reiki for forever I think now bc maud knows I'm a nutcase ( laugh.gif ) and could use a little ironing out of my energies.
if that session brought up emotions, maybe they were already working their way out & it gave them the push?
sometimes the fear of the results is much worse than what actually happens. (((((((ch)))))))) you know I <3 you.

confession: the mr & I bought this
today! :
Holy crap, Freck, that's gorgeous!
you play your cards right sweetheart & after I learn to ride it I'll take ya for a spin when you come to town wink.gif
(hee! & thank you!!)
um, freck... that is teh hawtness.

((((((syb))))) i wish i had something to say. sad.gif you have busted you behind for this, and it's only coming once, perhaps you should not care about how he feels. it already sounds like you resent him for how you are feeling.

(((((ch))))) think about the feelings that are coming up as energy you've had bottled up, and that was just a partial cleansing.
((((syb)))) I third it - we are all happy for you and proud! I wish you good luck feeling good about your accomplishments and sorting out your feelings about the Mr.
freckle - that's F***king GORGEOUS!! you go girl!! learn to ride it!!!

ps - I highly recommend taking the "riders edge" course at your local Harley Davidson dealer... it's not cheap, but super thorough, moreso than the regular state sponsored learn to ride courses. Plus you get to learn on a Buell!! I felt like I really could handle most situations after taking it. The bonus is that when you pass it, you get a certificate that you take into the DMV and it waives the driving portion of the motorcycle license test!!
Freck, if you don't mind I think I'll let you get accustomed to your new ride first before I ride bitch. biggrin.gif

Confession: I am really angry with some friends of ours & I'm wondering if I should find a way to politely confront them on their shit or just sweep it under the rug. Note that the only reason why I've been able to catch them on the aforementioned shit is because of Facebook. I've been on that damn site for just one week & it's already making my life more complicated! UGH!
((((((Syb))))) I can't tell you how proud I am of you. What you have done is huge. HUGE! And I'm so sad that you can't feel like you can show your pride to the mister.

My confession? I have been very picky lately about who I'm spending time with. Have come to the realization that I can't stand certain people's significant others. Am unsure how to address social situations where I want to say, I want to hang out with you, and no, your poopy boyfriend isn't invited. And because I can't be as blunt as I want to be, I just don't see the people I do want to see, or as often as I want to see them. Bah.

I would rather be single than be paired up with a wet blanket, or god forbid, become a wet blanket.
what raisin said, syb, seriously i have soooooooo much respect and admiration for what you have done. you are my idol in a kazillion ways. enjoy the hell out of it and let the chips fall where they may. you've earned it, and when you look back you don't want to regret not fully savoring the experience. it's what you've been working towards all these years.

raisin? why don't you just say you wanna hang out with your friend, but not the SO. just say it feels like you are losing some of the intimacy that they two of you used to have before the SO came along, and you just want to reconnect and strengthen that for a bit, and then go back to group activities, but tell her you miss the spirit and freedom she has when she isn't concerned with him, and you two can just relax.

confession:when i do work, i see opportunities come into view, but my insecurities smack me down hard, and i just bury my head in the sand and slack. on one hand i would love to make a living painting. i have friends who do, and there is even some great (i mean stunning) artists' lofts that subsidize artists in the city, but my fear of failure grows exponentually when i put myself out there even the littlest bit. i am easily my worst critic x1000999.

confession: i think i'm finally putting to bed the ghosts of all of my exs, and dealing (or trying to) with a lot of my shit, and i LOVE IT! here is hoping next year will find me happier, and so much healthier mentally and emotionally.

confession:i'm day dreaming about legally changing my last name to what is currently my facebook last name. if i use my first name, no one would get the joke, and if i use my middle name, which is what i go by, i still think most people would miss it (it's a xmas pun).... plus it makes me giggle.
Oh you guys. Thanks so much; it's so lovely to come in here and see all your support. GT, I think you're right: I need to savour this!

I accept that the mister and I can be on separate wavelengths sometimes; we're both busy and increasingly the stuff we each do doesn't overlap. He has gotten it together and is being supportive about my defense though which feels good. However, it is in under 3 hours so I need to get off the internet!!! blink.gif

Thanks again everyone. I admire all of you in so many ways, your respect means a lot to me.
you are a badass. Enjoy!
syb - what everyone else said.. I think that following one's passion is first and foremost, and you've worked long and hard to follow yours. enjoy!

QUOTE(girltrouble @ Sep 7 2009, 02:29 AM) *
confession:when i do work, i see opportunities come into view, but my insecurities smack me down hard, and i just bury my head in the sand and slack. on one hand i would love to make a living painting. i have friends who do, and there is even some great (i mean stunning) artists' lofts that subsidize artists in the city, but my fear of failure grows exponentually when i put myself out there even the littlest bit. i am easily my worst critic x1000999.

GT - oh I know EXACTLY what you mean. This used to be me. I did marginally well at my profession, but never really put myself out there - and there were many times when some good opportunities came my way that I did exactly that - put my head in the sand and slacked. It took my ex and I splitting up early 2005 for me to get my shit together - mainly because I had told myself that if we split up, I was going to do whatever it took to aggressively work on myself / my shit, which for me meant therapy. At one point, I remember my therapist asking me "what are you avoiding here?" when I'd turned down yet another big project to stay working on something that had been ongoing, but mind numbing, and totally under the radar. And I really had to think about it. The easy answer was that I was avoiding potential failure - but that also meant that I was avoiding potential success. I also realized I was avoiding the unknown for my nice little cocoon of safety - which was making me miserable and yet, I was staying in it. I took a lot of small steps in getting to the place where I realized that if I avoided just going for it, I'd look back on my life and never be able to say that I at least tried. But at some point, the small steps have to end, you have to shut off the brain, follow the gut, and just jump off the high dive into the deep end. It's the best analogy I know. And I've found that once you do, what you find at the other end is not a pool that you might drown in, but it's like you actually plunge over the first crest of a wonderful rollercoaster of ups and downs that propels you faster than you know into where you're going.

so just shut your eyes, click your heels, and jump, girl. stop thinking.

and I didn't get it and just do it until I was 38, so you have no excuse ;P

or to put it another way, in the words of the immortal Wayne Gretzky: "you miss 100% of the shots you don't take."

GT darling, do you have any idea how amazingly beautiful you are? You're stunning! And I'm not just talking about the outside, honeylamb, but who YOU are on the inside. You are so astoundingly brilliant and creative and talented. I'm on the whole other side of the continent, but your light still shines bright as day in my eyes. I cannot TELL you how strongly I believe in you! And yet, I totally and completely understand your hesitation.

This may sound silly, but I have a handful of inspirational quotes on my refrigerator. Reading them has helped me take some tiny steps forward this year.

"Our doubts are traitors and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt." - Shakespeare

"A ship in habor is safe, but that's not why ships are built." - a fortune cookie

"You can't make footprints in the sands of time if you're sitting on your butt. And who wants to make buttprints in the sands of time?" - Bob Moawad

Take Zoya's advice. Jump in. You are DEFINITELY strong enough to swim in the deep end, GT. And if you start to feel a little weak, the Busties will be your water wings. biggrin.gif
thanks zoya. i think it's been watching you and doodle thats made me want something more. i kind of think that what you were talking about is ezzakly where i'm at right now. when i broke up with mr. t i told her and myself it was to deal with my shit, and i started down that road, but the funny thing is, it's as if this year, was waiting for me. i talk to friends who are blunt enough to call me on my shit. hell, even a conversation with aural the other day pointed out a huge flaw that needs to be taken care of. all those issues that were so carefully camouflaged all this time stick out like sore thumbs. if i ignore them, i have to work at it, and then i feel like a dumbass. but you are right, and thank you guys for the encouragement.

oh, and, rosey, you have got to stop calling me honeylamb, because, f'realys, it starts the waterworks (yes, there are tears rolling down my cheeks, damn you! hmph!). now i wanna get all those quotes tattooed on me. i a dork or what?

GT - it's true, though - when we ask for something, and we are ready, we get it. You wanted to work on your shit, and you meant it - so you're getting it in doses, now. That's not a bad thing. ... plus, like you said, you probably couldn't have seen it before. There's no turning back now, which is a bit scary and a lot exciting. If you follow what's in front of you, and what you intuitively know you should do, without getting stuck in overthinking it... life meets you halfway. Ask Doodle, I'll bet she'll say the same. I'm certainly not anywhere near where I want to be, but I've come a hell of a long way in every area (even the shit crap relationship area, although it hasn't actually produced any relationship as of yet... feh)


(((GT))) Listen to zoya. She was extremely helpful for me when I was going through my self doubt this past year. I hope I can be as helpful to her as she has been for me. I think what I've been most inspired is in people who live their truths both professionally and personally. So, you've put your intention out into the's gonna happen for you. Unless, you let your fear control you and deter you from your life's purpose. You know what you need to do. You just need to remember that you deserve it.

Moonbeams, over and out!
GT, chiming in to say I agree with zoya: especially this: 'The easy answer was that I was avoiding potential failure - but that also meant that I was avoiding potential success.'

That was absolutely me. Until 5 years ago I didn't fully pursue what has become my passion (academia), but did a bunch of things without really committing... because I was afraid of jumping in and failing, but also of wanting something badly that I didn't feel I could achieve. It is hard and scary as hell to want something without any guarantee you'll get it, but it is also totally worth it to jump in and go for it. It's your life: make it as fulfilling as it can possibly be.

I know how smart and talented you are: to give a single example, you can run rings around me with your film knowledge, and that's the truth. You beautifully explicate films I still haven't heard of!
syb, thank you so very, very much. that means the world to me. i'm just speechless.

thank you for the encouragement. i really appreciate it. wub.gif
Go team Busties! To all successes & future successes! Huzzah!

Confession, apropos of nothing: I have dumped at least two men because they were bad writers in my estimation. Nice guys both, sexy & funny & smart. But utter HACKS. I just got an email from one today & wanted to throw up in my own mouth. I kept thinking, "And I sucked his dick when I should have shanked him with a quill pen in the throat?! WTF was I thinking?!"
I wonder if there's value in coming out of my cocoon of safety (so true, Zoya) later in life. I jumped off the deep end recently and did something never in a million years I thought I'd do. IT WAS AMAZING. And I want to do more. I feel like so many doors have opened in my mind (ooh, channeling Jim Morrison now). I'm troubled by all the years I talked down to myself, all those years I told myself I couldn't do x, y, or z for whatever stupid reasons I gave myself. But maybe I wasn't ready then. I want to go back to school. And I don't want to leave. I want to live my truth. No wonder why I had spectacular failures in other areas. I don't want to settle anymore. I look up to you more than you might think. wub.gif
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