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Dear indiecock,

I am too fucking tired of you being too tired to fuck.


dear jerky pants,

you say your friends call you joe btfsplk, who was the original character who had that dark cloud following him everywhere from little abner. he's called the world's worst jinx.

and it fits, but don't pretend that you didn't earn it. i thought i had misanthropic moods, but you have me beat by light years. i can't compare. to hear your philosophy made my skin crawl. yet you seem to think you are innocent. that all of these things happen to you, that you are dark, but you try so hard, but the bile you spew betrays you. you are quite simply one of the most racist, sexist, vile, disgusting people i've ever had the displeasure to have met. you justify your views by saying that they are statistics, when they are nothing of the sort. they are your opinion, but i cannot believe that you ever gave anyone the benefit of the doubt. that you ever met a person that you hadn't already decided that you hated for some reason or other. and when you got to your cliche speech about how white men and jewish men have it worse than anyone, that minorities have all of the benefits, and that whites, jews and asians are all "better" races, my jaw was on the floor. i debated you, even poined out that in calling them better, you were calling other races, one of which i belong to, inferior. i cannot believe that the irony, you being jewish, was utterly lost on you. am i supposed to feel flattered that in your esteem i might be an exception?

how funny that i wasn't.

for a second i thought i might want to date someone who challenged my ideas, because it would make me stronger. then i came to my senses. honestly, i think in many ways to me you have a form of moral, philosophical, social leprosy.

the kind i want nothing to do with. i don't want to be around that sort of all consuming hatred, let alone be infected by it. i don't say this to hurt your feelings but to make you look at your beliefs. do you see how they keep you trapped? how they keep you angry and stuck in this joe b. cycle? you put out hate, you get it back. i used to snicker at my ex because she would always tell me in my dark moods, that i need to choose love. meeting you has made what she has said so very concrete. i don't want, i can't be the one to pull you out of this wallowing in hate that you do, you have to. you seem to think everyone ought to think like you. i thank god, goddess, or even the universe that they don't. that most people refuse to limit people they meet by their race, by their sex. i'm sorry i find this habit of yours so unpalatable. it's disgusting.

thank you for the opportunity to meet you, you have taught me a ton in 2 days. but while we are on the topic of things learned, can i just tell you, joe btfsplk's name, is NOT pronounced blitflick. ask you constantly corrected. according to the creator of little abner himself says, it's pronounced like a razzing, and while you're from brooklyn, i'm sure you know it as a bronx cheer.

so it seems you don't know it all.

oh, and btfsplk.


ps. i'm suprized you do have friends. i wonder how long that will last.
Dear Mom,

I know you've been voting Republican for a long long time. So it meant a LOT to me today when you told me how deeply you were touched by Obama's inaugural address & how you have a lot of faith in him. Thanks for warming my cockles.

Your darling daughter
Dear Mom,

Thank you for pushing me to come over and spend this historical day with you. It WAS awesome to watch it with you, even though it was such an ordeal for me to get over there. All of that was forgotten when I saw how happy you were to see me at the door.

And Dad,

Believe me, given my situation, I KNOW I need that pocket change more than you do, but thank you for graciously taking it back. I mean, it IS yours. I don't want to take, take, take. You know I'm not like that. And don't think I didn't see that your gas tank was down to a quarter full!

TB -

Whooooa. That was so totally out of the blue. Of course I remember you - in fact, I just posted about you in the "List" thread. You were a near-miss, and very close to a regret. We drooled over each other for almost two years, though... at that point, how could either of us have survived the expectations?

Peruse my pics, send me a smart-ass message or two. I doubt we've much in common anymore, beyond the ship. It is indeed lovely to hear from you, though, and I will allow myself a few retroactive fantasies to commemorate the occasion.

I still get weak-kneed when I hear that Offspring song, you know.

- One Ping Only

Henry -

Get the fuck out of my dreams. I cannot deal with thinking of you this way, and so often lately. You are the last person on earth I should be crushing on, except for maybe his brother!

But for fuck's sake, boy - you have this way of wrapping your words around me like an Art Nouveau trellis. Delicate, teasing, but unequivocally possessive. Your intentions clear, but coded in phrases from my own poems. You use my own words to seduce me, and to simultaneously evade Beeps and June.

You're brilliant. You're beautiful. I wish you'd disappear forever.

- Anais

Two Beeps -

Nothing fools you. You see every maneuver of my mind. I'm glad you have a sense of humor about it all.

You are married to an incorrigible tramp... who loves you fiercely.

- One Ping Only
dear select IRL friends:

you wonder why i don't tell you shit? why you say, "catlady, why are you so aloof?" or "catlady, why do you put up walls?" or "catlady, why won't you open up, let people (us) into your life?"


because you're all judgemental assholes. i'd just as soon keep my cards close to my chest than deal with your knee-jerk monday morning quarterbacking on MY LIFE. me telling you intimate concerns in my life doesn't mean i'm asking for your PRICELESS commentary.

in the meantime, i get to silently give myself an ulcer because i don't trust any of you for support for the truly important matters. fine. i'll just eat it.

bugger off.

Dear Friend,

What the hell? You send me an email to say hi and happy new year, show me pictures of the kidlet, tell me how you've been, then ask me how I'm doing, I write back and lay it on the line and tell you what's REALLY going on over here, good and bad and in between, some time passes, and you don't even have the decency to write back to me? Because I KNOW you've read it. I do know. What the fuck, yo. I should have just talked to the wall. I wasn't looking for your pity, but a fucking acknowledgment would have been, I don't know, DECENT. Isn't that what friends do? I thought you were decent. Now I don't fucking know. Huh.

Puzzled and I probably should've picked up the goddamn phone instead to call you,
M: I wish you'd kiss me again. You spiced my life, my thoughts up the last time. I miss the thought of you.
Can you please send me another cryptic message? When I don't hear from you I regain my logical thinking about my future and well, there is no "we" in the logical future. I much prefer getting messages from you that make me all giddy and live in a world of maybe. Maybe it has always been you? Wouldn't that just make the best story? When your name is in my inbox my dreams at 16 seem like they could come true again.

R -

Yes, I sent you a reply to your email that was uber delayed and completely aloof. It was really fucking difficult to do.. but I just can't play it both ways. I can't fall into that cliche'd "friends" thing. We've been intimate, and it's the flipside of being fuck buddies. It's having your cake and eating it too - and i can't - won't - do it. But I can't tell you all this in an email. Better to just be aloof.

....... and now it's 8 hours later, and I'm listening to your band's myspace, and you singing. This sucks. This too shall pass, but it sucks ass. In a really fucking big way.



(((Zoya))) Good for you for knowing what works for you and acting on it. And yes, this too will pass. ((you))

thanks. I don't know if I know what works for me, I only know I'm trying to do things differently than I've done in the past because I just can't sell myself short with him. I like him too much to do that - if that makes any sense at all. I fucking miss the shit out of his presence in my world - but I can't have that presence at any cost - when I've done that in the past, I just end up hurting even more, and not honoring myself.

plus I've never had to deal with this with someone in the same city, same general circle. In my past life, I was always gonna be bailing out of town soon. I don't get to do that anymore. It's all uncharted territory, and I'm terrified.

I'm just trusting that the universe will take care of this, whatever that means, if I get out of the way, and live in faith, not fear. I just don't quite know what getting out of the way means.....


zoya, I was just going to post something along the same lines. I know exactly what you are going through. and fuck if coming off this "drug" isn't hard. We don't accept this in any other part of our lives, but in love, I know that i do. (((zoya)))


Stretching yourself thing for him isn't making you feel good, going out of your way, chasing him, trying to get a hole of him. none of this makes you feel good. So why continue? I know it's hard to walk away, but you know in your head that this isn't right. your heart may feel otherwise. But you need to stop calling, to stop texting to stop all of this. as you've said before, ultimately, you will play second fiddle, to put it mildly. For your own sanity, your self respect, for YOU, today is enough. You went a few days last week without talking to him, and you have reached your breaking point. Just continue on with it.

dear self,

it's over

you know it

say goodbye



p.s. your stronger then you think
(((((((zoya, ch, LMP))))))))
zoya, culture, and pugs,

in admire you all so much. and pugs is right, each of you is so, so, so much stronger than you know.

i know it's kinda cheesy, but this song always goes thru my head when i'm having a rough time. to me, it's kind of a stevie wonder-esque lullaby, and it always makes me feel better. it's my musical hug, and well, i wanna share since i love y'all so much. i'm a dork, i know. but still....

video and song are here

glenn lewis'
don't you forget it

Far away from that life, so young
That’s when you used to know
Many dreams since then you've had have come and gone
That time might show

But stress, don’t you let in
Don’t you forget it
Trust you’ll find your way love
Hope is what your heart is made of

And don’t you forget it
Don’t you forget your way home
For that little girl
Hold on to your world

You’re worlds apart from first where life was dark
Understanding what it means to have got
Nothing but your heavy broken hearted
Memories of what used to be, with change comes responsibility

Don’t forget where you are
ain't where you’ve been
Life’s lessons then
made you into woman

And don’t you forget it
Don’t you forget your way home
For that little girl
Hold on to your world

Hold on, hold on, hold on

Don’t you be afraid
‘Cause a heartbeat away
resolved and you'd never think
That sentiment would then mean to you

Don’t need to cry
You can dry your eyes
‘Cause you can count on
The love that through the years
helped you face your fears
and subside your tears
Everything will be okay
Don’t you be afraid

Don’t you be afraid

And don’t you forget it
Don’t you forget your way home
For that little girl
Hold on to your world

thanks busties!!!

as a quick update, in classic CH fashion, the best thing to get over someone, is to fuck someone (uhhh, or more, hee) that was the push I needed. I have no desire to talk to him. I'm thinking that this is about it now.

(((((pugs and zoya)))))

GT, i heart you.
dear culturehandy,

two words: pussy control


dear gt,

i LOVE that song. the video too. he has a whole wall of albums. good choice. i shall add that song to my playlist of positive songs.

babygirl you're going to be fine in time, just like sweet Gt has written.
more ((((((((((((((((pugs))))))))))))) pm me if you ever want.

gt: I KNOW. I owe you a note or somfin' eh?
just wanted to tell ya's I still lurve you, and let's get back to it soonly?
smooches & hugs,

J: I love the idea of being a Bitch Goddess. even though we are nothing but platonic, it's giving me a boost & a spark when I've been kinda iffy & low off n on the last weeks.
I won't tell you this bc I think you have this vision of me as infallible but your friendship, and learning of the cult in my honor, means a lot to me. although addressing me in pm's as Goddess is a little bit weird, just 'S is fine perhaps.
however, don't let this mess up your marriage please, I'm very married and it's not really real, right?

world in general: I do most sincerely apologise for wearing this maud-awful sweater today.
Note to Self:

usually going home after work is the most exciting part of the day. today not so much. it's the most sad. nothing to go home to.

go to mom's, go shopping, go home and go to bed. keep it short and simple.

don't forget to pray. God loves you.

Amen (or something)

Dear B -

thanks. I know I'm going to feel like shit tomorrow after those 5 pints of beer over the course of the night - especially since i have to be up at 7 am - but I'm really glad I ran into you. I'm really glad you asked, and I'm really glad you listened, and I really really hope you keep your word about keeping it to yourself.

it was awesome to just hear the words from your mouth when you said what you said.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Please just keep it to yourself now...... I trust you will, though. smile.gif

Dear Mr,

If I'm going to be the little wifey at home whilst you are out being the breadwinner then be prepared for nights when I want to hit you on your noggin with a frying pan.

Tonight is one of those nights.

Texting me to say you've just left the office at the exact minute that you normally walk through the door isn't on. Dinner was waiting for you and is now ruined. You knew that what I was making tonight would be precise and that it involved me slaving over a hot cooker for an hour.

You can try rectifying it upon your return or we can throw it out (because we can really afford to waste food just now).

On this occasion we will draw a line under it but if this happens again, your dinner will be fed to the dog (I know we don't have one but that is so not the point just now).

Love you oodles,

Your Mrs

P.S. I am so sending this.
that is precisely what I hardly ever cook anymore.
I Can cook, but it's usually not worth the effort or the waste.
my vote goes to the frying pan.

oxox, freckle
um... bunny, if i didn't think you were already pretty awesome/kick ass, that last letter would have gotten you there all on it's own.

and freckle, well, i just love you just cos. (u no y)

I don’t know why I am thinking about you lately. I used to think about you every day that passed but now; I don’t. Not after that shit you pulled. Choosing a random chickenhead that you used to date over your best friend (ie: me) was NOT cool. I honestly don’t know if I will ever forgive you for that. I am not holding a grudge, I am merely annoyed. The only way it would work is if you begged on your knees for my friendship and we both know that you aren’t that type of man. I keep trying to tell myself that I really don’t care but if I didn’t would I still be making random iTunes playlists in your honor? I don’t think so. The truth is that I do care about you deeply – I wouldn’t say that I still love you or anything – but I wonder what you are doing and where you are as you tend to be quite nomadic; I wonder how your heart is since I know that is has spent most of your life being dented by various people and that is most likely why we are no longer friends (mainly because it scared you to finally find someone who wouldn’t dent you; again, ie: me). I guess I just wanted to say that I do hope that you are well, wherever you may be, and that I miss you, but what we had can never be again. I hope for it in passing but I know that my wishes will never come true.

I remain forever yours,

Oh and (((Pugs))) as well. =)
Dear girltrouble,

Aw, shucks wub.gif.

It actually really helped; I vented it all out by being creative and mocking the situation!
*note to self


Dear freckle,

He fixed it!
It was tasty (if I do say so myself).
He was stuck in a meeting with his boss so couldn't contact me.
All is forgiven.


Dear skelf,

Get the fuck out of my thumb already.

Bunny, that's why I never make anything too complicated on weeknights. I save the more time-consuming stuff for the weekend. Also, I always wait until Sheff calls me when he leaves the office before I start cooking.

And yes, I learned this the hard way. wink.gif

QUOTE(roseviolet @ Jan 27 2009, 03:49 PM) *
Bunny, that's why I never make anything too complicated on weeknights. I save the more time-consuming stuff for the weekend. Also, I always wait until Sheff calls me when he leaves the office before I start cooking.

And yes, I learned this the hard way. wink.gif

*Sigh* Been there, done that. My favorite is when I've made something, complicated or not, and he decided he doesn't want it ("I'm just not in the mood"). Well, I hope you're in the mood for peanut butter and jelly because that's all you know how to make for yourself. Last night he wasn't in the mood for the chicken chili I made. I caved and got Middle Eastern food on the way home from the shelter. Now I'm just keeping the chili at work and eating it for lunch everyday.
since hubby works from home , when I get home from work this is what I hear
Hubby:What do you want for dinner
Me: Something proteiny and vegetabley whatever you make is fine babe. can I help you?
Hubby: stay out of my kitchen
Me: okay

he does the dishes too. I am a lucky woman. I also have a shrine to his mother who taught him how to cook. Technically its HIS kitchen and he fears for it when I do decide to actually cook something. which I can.
Dear Self -

Monday - Sad Day

Tuesday - Angry Day

Wednesday - ???

At least get out of bed and get your ass to work. You like work and you have church tonight. You showered now get up and get to work. up...I mean it...what are you doing?...your still sitting...

okay bye,

rose, polly, missladyj,

Usually the kitchen is his domain; he's the one with the fancy gadgets and the expensive knives and he loves to cook but since he's out working all day and I, at the moment, am not, I'm trying to be nice and I do enjoy cooking. I'm learning though and I will try not to be super efficient and have it waiting for him unless I know for sure that he's actually on the train.

Tonight's dinner is going to be something that requires minimal effort.
Dear Pugs,
You will get through this!
QUOTE(missladyj @ Jan 28 2009, 06:33 PM) *
Dear Pugs,
You will get through this!


Ditto... love, hugs, and strength babe.


dear flatmate -

I do really like you. you've been a very good flatmate and I was really lucky to find you.

That said, I cannot fucking wait for your month off to be over and your new job to start. If you do not stop being such a busybody around the house, I'm gonna grab my really nice chef's knife - you know, my "special" knife that I don't let anyone use unless they are actually cooking and physically attack you. You're making me crazy.

Also can you please not slurp when you eat cereal?

thank you
Dear B, Please don't dismantle the garden yet. I'm having doubts and second thoughts, and I'm confused. Maybe I acted too rashly and made decisions based on anger. It sounds stupid, but I feel like I let you down. Maybe you're already sure you don't want to be with me. I want to feel sure that this is the right decision for both of us right now, and I don't. Can't couples get through things like this? But maybe I'm just sad and lonely and want to end the pain and emptiness I'm feeling. I'm trying to remember all the downsides of our relationship and the pain I felt when we were together. There were just so many things I didn't know, but now that I know them, they seem more manageable and less overwhelming. I'm trying to remember that there were a lot of things lacking between us and that maybe I can find someone better for me someday. Why did this have to happen? L
you'll all put your faith in ME? Little old me?

I mean, I said I'd be willing to be on the board if I was written in.....but being in the middle of a coup to oust our unfriendly one....scares the CRAP out of me.

I am glad you have such faith in me. I hope I can live up to it.

See you tomorrow.
Double-post. Sorry! unsure.gif

I am sorry for everything and anything that I have ever done to you. I am mourning your loss daily and I am too scared to send you a letter to see if I can make up for it because if you don't want to be friends again my heart won't be able to take it. I do hope that I will be able to talk to you again and that you will be able to put our past behind us.



You know what you need to do, now pick up your "balls" and do it. You will be better off as a single unit; for some reason you do not operate well as a pair. Yes, he has his good times, but those are few and far between. It will be okay. It is not going to be easy but it will be okay. You will still have your fur-babies for companionship.



I love you a little too much. More than I am able to put in words. Thank you for putting up with all my shit and listening to me rant for hours and for helping me pay bills I cannot afford and for believing in me. I am not kidding when I say that I hope that whoever is up there takes us on the same day because I do not want to spend one minute on this Earth without you. I honestly believe you to be my truest love.

everyone -

sorry to keep bitching about my flatmate in here, it's the only place I can vent...


flatmate -

as flatmates go, you're great. but you're FUCKING DRIVING ME CRAZY. I work from home. Because I'm sitting at the table does not mean I can have a chat with you. In addition, I have not been able to sleep until like 4 in the morning for the last few weeks, and thus I wake up late and really have to slam on my work. I'm sorry if I'm short with you, but I can't focus when you're singing and eating loudly and talking to me. I know I could just go to my room, but I have spent so much time in my room in the last month, just trying to drag my ass out of bed, that I need to be out here in the living room working. In the last few days, I've finally been able to get myself to get through a short list of stuff to do each day, which is huge steps from where I was at two weeks ago - hell, even a week ago - and I need to keep with it. Not only am I getting shit done, but it's actually helping me feel a bit better emotionally. I realize this is your month off before you start your new job, but please respect the fact that I AM AT WORK. I know you understand that I'm working, but I don't think you get just how real this is. Just cause I can get up, have the TV on in the background, allow myself to surf the internet for 10 min every hour, etc. does NOT mean I am not doing work and you can blether away to me.

oh, also - I know we are moving out and stuff needs to be done. But please chill out. It will get done. I promise. I'm stressing here because I am still trying to find a place.

you know, I never really realized just how laid back I am until this month when you've been such a busybody!!

ok, vent over.

Dear S.,

I am writing you because I want to be straight and honest with you. I have showed this to Mr. Pugs so there is not secrets amongst the three of us. I am not trying to be caddy or condescending.

I am very uncomfortable with your relationship with Mr. Pugs. I know in high school you had a crush on him. It was obvious whenever you were around him. I know now you aren’t happy with your husband. I know your husband doesn’t like Mr. Pugs and you don’t like me. That’s fine. I’ve never done anything to you and vice versa. I tried to send you a myspace message one time to thank you for being such a good friend to Mr. Pugs and your response can only be described as rude. I know you think you know Mr. Pugs better then I do. I know you think you know me. You don’t know anything about me or about Mr. Pugs. I’ve been with him 12+ years. I know him better then anyone else.

We are having a very hard time right now. You know this. If you and your husband were having a hard time and he was going to a married woman’s house when her husband was at work to “hang out” and if he talked to her daily and texted her incessantly while you were sitting right next to him how would you feel about that? If he texted her and then lied to you about it how would you feel? If you were lying in bed with him talking with him and trying to heal your relationship during very hard times and she texted him how would you feel? It’s a breeding ground for mistrust. It is mental infidelity when both of you are entertaining the thought of spending time with each other and not your partner. You are both starting to make a habit of investing emotional and relational energy into one another.

You and Mr. Pugs have a lot in common and that’s great. But what he needs to be doing right now is handling his affairs at home and not turning to you. You are a distraction to both of us. We need to work on us. I’m asking you woman to woman to please put some distance between you and Mr. Pugs. He will not do it because he’s afraid of hurting your feelings. I’m not asking you to never talk to him again. I’m just asking for distance. We need to work on us. We can’t do that with another woman in the picture.

You are doing nothing but driving the stake deeper and deeper between us. I’m not blaming all our problems on you. I promise you that. I know that Mr. Pugs and I have many things to work on but an inappropriate relationship with a married woman shouldn’t be on the list. I wonder how your own husband feels about you and Mr. Pugs and if he even knows how often you two talk. I think he would be uncomfortable with it as well.

I’d appreciate if you both could respect my concern and request to distance yourselves from each other. I hope you read this message a few times and think it over before you attack me. I’m trying to talk to you like an adult. Put yourself in my shoes and try to understand where I’m coming from on this. Think how you would feel if this was your marriage, your husband and your feelings.

Thank you,


Warning: Seriously violent images ahead.

To this guy:

I hope you die. But not easily or quickly. I hope you fall infront of a train and end up getting dragged a mile down the tracks so that your lower body is damn near severed from the rest of you. I hope that the doctors have to amputate everything from the waist down and just when you think you will be okay, severed lower body and all, you get a staph infection and they have to take your arms as well before you just die. If you are looking for mercy, look somewhere else. You would have done it to her.

Two Beeps -

Please, please don't beat up on yourself. I know how devastated you feel right now, and your lovely, logical little brain just wants a REASON, a right and reasonable REASON. But there's nothing concrete about this. No one to blame. Least of all yourself.

It was a fun job, I know. Tearing around in the middle of the night, listening to the wildest stories, dodging sideshows, helping old ladies and damsels in distress. Weird days and hours off. Never a dull moment. But some of it, love, had already begun to sting your soul. Abused kids, battered wives, helpless addicts, abandoned schizophrenics.

The ones you couldn't help.

One of the things I have always loved in you is your funny mix of breathless optimism and brazen cockiness. Nothing's gonna foil your plan. Nothing's gonna break-a your stride. But these things, love, in that other world, can get you killed. You have to pay attention to the dude in the upstairs window. You have to cuff the tweaker. Even if you think you could get away from them - because you might not even be the target.

These are the things you laugh at me for - these are the things that women, perhaps, are just taught from birth to treat with caution. A van parked too long near the restroom at the gas station. ("I'm not going in there." "Why not?") A parking spot under a broken streetlamp. ("Never mind, I'll drive up the block." "What for?") These are the things that tickle my feelers... and that don't even ping your sonar.

There's nothing wrong with that, really. Just a different outlook, and it's served you well so far. But a cop has to be kinda paranoid. A cop can't place a lot of faith in humanity. In order for you to become a cop, you would have to become.... not you.

And that's not worth it, love. It's not worth the paycheck or the security or the stories or the shiny badge. It's not worth this balance, this equilibrium we have, this weird little world we've scratched together and sheltered and saved from the service and the sea.

And it's certainly not worth some brass knocking on my door at 3am to tell me I've lost my best friend, my love, my partner in crime, all because you could never recognize danger.

This is not a failure, love. It was an experiment, and experiments can never really fail. You just wash the beakers out and find a new hypothesis. The solution is somewhere.I don't give a damn if we're camping out under the Park Street Bridge, as long as you're with me, and you're in one piece.

Let this go, love. Let it be. I am still here. And you are still my hero.

- One Ping

Kitten, you're being about as nice to that guy as I would have been. mad.gif

A cop can't place a lot of faith in humanity. In order for you to become a cop, you would have to become.... not you.

((rudderless and one ping)) I can't think of a better reason not to be a cop.
little pieces of happiness? reading anything rudder writes.

thank you for sharing rudder. that was just such a beautiful letter.
(((rudderless and two beeps))))

Dear Work,

well, here it's come again. once again there is a blatant abuse of my job position so here it is.

I am not hear to train staff, this is your responsbility to figure out and use the resources that are available, in the form of other workers in your office. My job is to step into a case load and do the work. it is NOT to train staff, it is NOT to help clean up the fucking paper bombs in other workers offices, it is NOT to lick your ass, or do whatever it is you want. NO, again, my ROLL is to step into a case load where the worker is away. I am not here to cover a case load that is already disolbved, then have you put it back together for the two weeks I am there. I am not here to cover whoever is away for the day.

So to everyone who needs this, be aware that your blatant misuse and abuse of my job position is what has caused it's demise. YES, once I leave, there will not be anyone in this position and you will be left to figure things out on your own. No longer will I be here to figure things out for you. In fact, people are considering dismantelling this program altogether. Again, out of your own bungling of a program which, in theory, was a good one.

Because so many of you lied on the request forms, because so many of you mislead on the request form and bold faced LIED to my supervisors, it's done and gone. you wonder why no one wants to stay in this position? It's because we have to watch our backs, because we get abused, mislead and crapped on more than other workers, yet our pay is exactly the same. No one understands how difficult it is to step into this and you ahve NO history, you have to go into a fucking disaster, be expected to call it your own, then walk away. Very nice.

kindest regards, and bite me.

Dear self,

This will pass.
This will pass.
This will pass.

Now do some work. Love, Me
Dear J,

Ordering me to come over to your place? Please. You should well know by know that shit like that doesn't fly with me. In fact, it makes me dig my heels in even further. The reason I'm not into you? I think you tried way too hard. And you are still trying way too hard. And our mututal friend told me that I seemed to be a prize winning county fair pig to you. you want the prize just to say it's you could get it.

Please. *rolls eyes*

You will never, ever, EVER get with me. So stop trying.



Don't make me social organizer and then organize an event without at least telling me please. Oh wait, it's your friggin club. I'm trying to help you, and your damn geek club be more social. Didn't we discuss this last week?? You piss me off. I invited you into my house three times. I know you hate dogs, but I'm sorry. We have two, and one is a puppy in training. You bitch and moan about not dating anyone. It could be because you're anti-social! You don't talk! You asked me to be a social organizer, and then vetoed everything I wanted to do? I'm trying to plan fun activities around drinking and well, meeting people. Is this not WTF?

You have a crush on Mcgeek, and that's okay. He is teaching you the GRE class, but quit swooning man. Do you want my lip balm? (yuefie reference)


Just because I let you sleep in the bed last night doesn't mean I forgave you. Forgetting a gift on my birthday is so fucking wrong. If you propose today, I will probably say no. Go to Athens, and I'll head to Portland.

Men need rocks throw at them. I'm a bitter valentine today.

nice try caverona. but next time you try to make me look bad in front of the boss, you might want to make sure she's not standing right there with me, exactly where i said i was, watching me do exactly what i said i was doing. but you know, nice try.
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