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((sidecar)) Sorry we'll miss you, but sounds like a weekend off is a good idea.

((sassy)) Yelled at for talking to each other?!?! That's how the customer service dept. was getting when I was at the insurance company and that's why I moved to the accounting department. Of course, they were a little too laid back (laid-back accountants? Whoda thunk it?)

I hit a bottom in my mood last night. I went to go to bed, and y'know how when you're trying to fall asleep, all your feelings are amplified? If you're excited/happy about something, it's all you can think about and it keeps you up? Then in the morning (when you're tired, after being kept up late from your excitement) you're like, "uh, that wasn't that big of a deal." So I went to go to bed and it all kind of hit me...Le Boy has made some really asshole comments this week about me being home all day and not doing anything (like wallowing in my own crepulence isn't enough?!?!) and it really got to me last night, and of course, he was already asleep, so I couldn't do anything about it. I couldn't stay in bed and cry, so I went and slept on the couch, after I spent 45 minutes on the internet looking for a therapist around here who doesn't charge $100/session.

When I lived with my parents in a different township, I was going to a therapist who worked at a facility that the township funded, so it was relatively cheap. When I first started, and didn't have insurance, it was about $7/session. Then I got insurance and I think I paid $35/session, and insurance paid the rest. Anyway, I'm in a different township and can't find a facility like that here. I emailed the place I used to go to to find out if they knew if there's one here, and I also found a private therapist who says she can charge on a sliding scale, so I emailed her to find out just how sliding it is. I found another place that sounds like it could be a publicly funded facility, but they didn't have a website. I'll probably just have to call or drive past it to see what it's like.

((rose)) Too bad you felt too sick to eat last night. Weren't you getting sick before stuff with Sheff's company before? I wonder what's going on. Oh, the color I used was called Brilliant Bordeaux, and it's one of the Feria ones, if you're interested.

I feel a little better now, but I've got to have a talk with Le Boy. He's at work right now, a rare chance for overtime and since we definitely need the $$, I told him to work as many hours as they'll let him. I've got the Chicago Bustie Get-together in less than 6 hours, so that makes me happy!
Aw, gee, now I come prancing in here and I feel bad that so many of you are depressed. I'm sorry you're going through rough times.

I just came in to gloat that I had a hot substitute teacher today at dance. H-O-T-T. Why yes, Mr. Dance Teacher, you most certainly can put your hands on me so I can squeeze with my legs so I can get the position right! bahahahaha Okay, it was behind the knee, but still... Oh yes, it has been a very nice day so far. I thought diryt thoughts while trying to maintain my balance. Is that so wrong?!

RV, dye your hair. I dyed my hair in my early 20s bright red
(an unnatural red something like this) using Manic Panic, but first had to bleach it because, like you, I'm a brunette. AND I was working at the time. Don't know what I was thinking, but thank heavens I didn't get fired for doing something like that to my hair. I'm glad I did it for the short time I did it. So my vote is yes -- if you end up hating it, you just dye it back dark brown, no big deal.

And is the nausea part of the anxiety? Is there a connection? I don't know a whole lot about it.

Yeah, I'm so not coming to NY. Too much nesting to do Chez Raisin! Yes, that includes getting my knit on. Have a great weekend, y'allz.
Polly, I understand that late-night frustration. Sometimes I got so pissed off with my ex that I would lay in bed & look at him & imagine punching him in the head. Grrr. Never did it, of course. Best of luck to you in the hunt for a new therpist!

Horray for HOTT dance teachers!

I'm hesitant to dye my hair just because I've never done it before. I'm a hair dye virgin & totally ignorant on all things hair-dye related. Will it alter the texture of my hair? How often will I have to dye my roots? Should I have it professionally done the first time? Blahbiddyblah.

Anti-kvetch: Somebody from my hometown was on Wait Wait today. Yay!

Kvetch: I think that some of the sickness was, indeed, stress-induced. I feel like it's oddly connected to my endometriosis, too. It's as if the stress of the situation affects my hormone levels, which in turn affects my endometriosis & causes it to constrict & bloat & make me feel miserably ill. I've felt sick lots of times when there have been work-related get-togethers for Sheff. I made it to a couple, but I've missed a couple too. Most of the time I could blame it on my period because those get-togethers kept happening on the first day of my period ... which is a BAAAAAAD day for me now that I've gone off the pill. But last night I could not blame my period.

Anti-kvetch: I'm glad I finally forced myself out the door. We really did have a good time.
several blue fingers and two ink cartridges later... I have nearly finished the christmas cards! woo me!

(((((rose)))))) yay for having a good time. go for the dye! you want too...
((((polly))))) acos & crossed fingers for therapist! and love the hair!
((((raisin)))) yay for hott dance teachers!
(((((sassy))))) extra tight hugs for you. boo on mcgeek and work. actually, double boo on work.
((((sidecar)))) i hate it when everything smells of smoke.
((((dm)))) good to see you!
(((((mando, tes, bunny, yuefie, stargazer, pixie, sixe, dusty, crassy, syb, candy, txplum, pink, sonik, everyone, especially the depressed busties)))))

Boy Wonder being a pain in the bum about his hockey pads. The couriers have the wrong postcode, won't change it until they hear from the sender - and I run around headless-chicken style. he announced that he's not that bothered and they can wait. that's a third of my rent of not bothered. mad.gif

talking of headless chickens, can F get some smooth move vibes? He's moving on monday... and has been packing for the last two days. I keep winding him up as I've been having a weird down few days and had a moment of insecurity. He makes me smile. Apparently I appear in his dreams biggrin.gif (weirdly though, in his dream, I kissed him on the cheek when he was going to sleep... and i sent him an email saying "i will give you a kiss on the cheek as you're asleep" that morning... so when he was asleep).

I have an exam on monday. I'm doing... not a lot. Indigo and I went for a walk this morning - he played a little with a little spaniel he's met before and had great fun. He's been asleep since we got back!
Rose, I'm PM'ing you about your hair dying questions!

~*~*~vibes to mornington & F~*~*~

again, I'm en-route to my new and comfy bed (where mandoo has been sprawled out all day, looking v pleased with himself). this time to watch veronica mars (and be up to date with US BUSTies!); I'm meeting lord_farquhar on monday and he'll kill me if I haven't watched the most recent episode as he's bursting to talk to someone about it!

*~*~*~*kicks mornington up arse to go study~*~*~*~


I want pink tips to my hair.

I shall write my Christmas cards tomorrow. Promise.
I'm working on my holiday cards too, so if any of you lovelies would like one please PM me your info smile.gif
second me on that call... I'm liking this sending-out of cards. I get to feel all growed up wink.gif

I'm going to get something done to the bonce in the new year. involving dye... maybe just highlights, maybe something else as well.

night all
Polly, the photo of your one-eared petrified pupper made me guffaw with glee! And your hair is to die for. What brand/color do you use, cuz that looks an awful lot like l’oreal preference 'copper penny'. The one i lusted after once upon a time, and danny once told me to use, saying loudly, for everyone in the store to hear, “come on mommy, face your fears.” Hee. (I stayed with my nice and safe 'light auburn'. Because I’m a chickenshit.)

And of course I feel what you’re going thru, on the therapist hunt. i’m still on the fence as to whether this is really for me. But I do plan on going at least 3 more times. Part of me feels like I’m just doing this so I can get meds. which, now, fuck, i'm not even sure i'm taking the right one?

speaking of which, (((Tesao))) when you get the chance, i could use any advice you're willing to share. I’m actually not getting too much guidance, either from the doc or my therapist (who’s a social worker, and definitely shies away from doling out pharmacological advice – which I sort of wish I knew beforehand). I thought wellbutrin was for anxiety and depression? Therapist said she could refer me to a pharma-somebody, but I’m paying for this out-of-pocket, and really don’t want to have to go see someone else.

(((raisin))) I’m so sorry I wasn’t up to the craftacular today. But this was the first Saturday in months I didn’t have to be somewhere, and the downtime was sorely needed. I’ve had so much going on, in the pat week and a half - so many committments – and with my driving anxiety (no “spells”, but the fear is constant), no wonder I’ve been hanging by a thread. Maybe these two days “off” will help things dissipate.

*eagerly awaiting amilita’s opening-night update*
*jealous of stargazer's bustie soiree*
*hello wave to pink*
*smooth-move vibes for F* although I have to laugh, because “smooth-move” is a traditional medicines tea that facilitates pooping. Hee.

(((minipixie))) & (((mr. pixie’s minipixie))) my niece had a horrible lice episode 3 yrs ago. No hair-cutting, but her mom threw out all her stuffed animals. Which would’ve traumatized me bigtime. stuffed animals are real, in my world. (the velveteen rabbit makes me sob. even tho it's my favorite. and i own a velveteen rabbit that looks just like the original. but yeah. sob.)

I’m distraught about p’s pony. Sonik, do keep us posted on that, k?

(((rose))) good for you for making it to the party. i would’ve bailed. And of course you should dye your hair, now is a perfect time! I’m happy to advise you also. Or pop into the hair thread.

Sidecar, they still let you smoke in chi-town? I’m shocked, I thought every city and every town in the universe was smoke-free now. (which yes, NOW i FINALLY don’t mind – shock shock – because I’m down to only smoking one or three when I’m imbibing, and that’s it. It’s even more fun to socialize outside, us evildoers. Unless it’s raining or humid, then I get pissypants. But I can just as easily not smoke, no biggie. it's nice not to be addicted anymore.)

antikvetch: i bought these decorative gift-boxes from cvs, 10 for $4.99, and used them to "wrap" my sister and b-i-l's gifts today. and they are so lovely, they don't need to be wrapped. i'm going back and buying at least 20 more. so, no cards and now ... no wrapping for me this year! i feel zero guilt. i'm all about the low-maintenance this year. because i'm worth it. tongue.gif

kvetch: i'm so bummed i won't be seeing my sister this xmas. with all the time they took off for mom's party and then lil cousin's funeral, and since xmas falls on a monday, they can't trek north, even just for two days. and did i tell you guys? she's pregnant! due in june! this is my first "blood" niece/nephew! i'm so sad i can't rub her belly & kiss the beanie baby. sniff.
**fly by**

kvetch: i had this lovely post yesterday when my post wouldn't go through. i tend to have this trouble only when i need to post in here. what gives.

kvetch2: another rejection today. damn. it didn't help that i talked to a friend yesterday and she has an interview. another girl we go to school with has 3 interviews. wtf? kinda nervous.

antikvetch: chicago busties coming in 30 min.!

oh, and i want a report from the busties who went to the event in NY!
Just got back from the gathering at Stargazer's- it was so much fun! Me, humanist, tart, kittenb, janeinane, turbo, and a friend of Stargazer's were there. Lots of good food ((passes around the leftover chocolate peppermint cookie bars))) and stargazer's house is so warm and festive- if I stayed any longer, I would have just fallen asleep on that couch! The ornament I got (it was from your friend, right, Stargazer? or was it from you?) was a martini glass-shaped piece of glass with green glitter and an "olive"- so cute!

Mando, the color is by Feria (one of the Loreal brands) and it's called Brilliant Bordeaux. I think it's considered "Dark Auburn" or "Rich Auburn". If you're tempted to go darker, why don't you just do a semi-permanent? It'll wash out soon enough if you don't like it. Congrats to your sister (and you, Aunt Mandolyn!)

Rose, I just sent the PM about the hair- ran out of time earlier.

I may PM some of you card-offerers, but I need to see if I have enough cards to reciprocate with!
yay for BUSTie gatherings! the ornament exchange sounds wonderful and I am so envious of you all! I will definitely be visiting Chicago one of these days as so many lovely BUSTies live there (and my Papa was born there).

yay for auntie mandolyn!

and all you beautiful red-heads or wannabe red-heads!

~*~*~*smooth move vibes for F~*~*~*~ oh, and mornington, I dreamt that you wrote something v naughty about F wink.gif.

had fantastic Indian food last night and thought of Kvetchies (particularly pixie and rose) and I am now caught up with VM and emotionally invested.
stargazer: maybe TPTB are trying to tell you that you are busting too much??

NAH. couldn’t be that. maybe TPTB are trying to tell you to write your post in word or some other editor so that they don’t get lost? that is what i personally have decided!

the crafty bustie – rama at your place sound faboo. soooooooooooo happy!! here’s to martini ornaments!!! sidecar needs one!! wink.gif

mandomyheart: will try to get my act together to PM you. there are LOTS of different possibilities. it depends on what you are willing to have and not have. and believe me, that covers a LOT. and then that will change; at least it did with me. priorities change over time.

polly, ooooooooooooooh la la!!! you know, of course, that i have a “thing” for redheads??? you are ze cat’s merrrrow!

rosie v – this is THE time to experiment with your hair! you can do whatever you want with it!!! it will always grow out. or you can dye it back to close to the original color. or you can use a rinse color just to see what you think of it. when you get permanent color, it does change the texture of your hair – or at least it does with mine. now, remember just how baby fine my hair is, and how little there is of it. this is a GOOD thing for me. i personally don’t actually use any color. i just use bleach to bring up some highlights. the strong Mozambican sun does the rest. be careful if you are using bleach! it can be deadly. to loads of things. if i were you, i would recommend highlites first. and no bleach, just color. and yes, the first time, i would go to a stylist. that way, if something bad happens, they will have to fix it. NOT that anything bad will actually happen. it’s like insurance. most of the time you pay for nothing. that is how they get their take. there is also some sort of commercial stuff that you brush in yourself, but i can’t remember what it is called. i used that on a friend’s hair and it looked rad. she was HOTT.

mornington, i am in officially in love with indigo. i just thought that i should tell you that.

polly – bwaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahahaah! i totally lost it and scared the dren out of meemaliscious mimoushka when i opened that photo of your festive – and petrified – poochie! (we are evil incarnate, aren’t we? it was just too funny!!!)

Indian food. mmmmmmmmmmm. i may have to do that this week. there is some fairly good Indian food here. and thai. no good Chinese, though. (Chinese, but only touristy stuff – not real Chinese. ) and NO mexican, or tex-mex, or even anything vaguely related. there IS amazingly tasty African food, though, so i shouldn’t complain. hell, i shouldn’t complain, dot com. i have enough to eat, and live in lovely apartment, and have oodles of close friends, and the best boy in the world, and a job i love……sometimes i break down and cry over the things i see in the streets and outside my windows…..i try to comfort myself by telling myself that i am doing something….no matter how small. if we all lit one candle, we could illuminate the universe.

i am not sending out holiday cards. i would have to send them via sky net, or UPS or some other international carrier, because although there IS a post office here, there are no mail carriers. so please, don’t try to send me any cards, even though i would love them and would so be into sending cards to you if i thought they had even 80% chance of getting to you. sigh.

let’s see, what else…?

sassy: YOUR WORK SUCKS. the big green weenie. i want to tell them so. i fart in their general direction. they are total ass hat idiotas. boo on them. you, however, are wonderful, faboo and lovely. keep sending out those cvs. and keep your eyes open for an opportunity to get them for discrimination for your disability, ignorant creeps.

bunny b: your new bed/bedding sound soooooooooooo yummy!!! there is nothing quite so satisfying as new nesting materials, is there? oh! i have now officially seen all of season one of Veronica Mars. Season Two has just started here – which is why i don’t hang out in the we used to be friends thread. i can’t believe that lilly had such POOR taste. icky poo. i’m not sure how i feel about veronica and logan, though. they certainly have chemistry. and i understand the draw. he is a baaaaaaaaaaaad boy. but he is also an ass hat. hmmmm. let me see some more of season two and i’ll get back to you!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~ keep your sanity moving vibes for F! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

amilita, how was the opening??? i am all agog to hear!!

~*~*~*~*~*~*~* mini pixies, hair, and lice be gone!!! *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

raisin, i am listening to live tori. and creaming my pants (my safari pants that i haven’t worn since 1989!!!!! wooooooooooooooooooohooooooooooooooooo!!! for tori!) and thank the gods that mr hb will be here SOOOOOOON. heee!!

rose, i’m curious about the place you and sheff went – is it a big barn??? oh! i have just passed on your coordinates to A and M and L and you should hear from them soon, unless A is out of the country.  heeee! rosie got to meet bff!!!! (you know, i NEED to post those photos of you and me and mr. steel! you are soooooooooooo lovely. and such a gorgeous couple!!! in every sense of the word!)

dm: yuuuuuummmm. fried chicken and red beans and rice. no fried chicken here! (or red beans for that matter….but i suppose that i could make them myself! anyone have a good recipe for red beans????) what did you wind up doing over the weekend?? just sleeping and snuggling sounds like heaven to me!

pink! i need to get my happy bum bum over to el jay and make a post. i wasn’t in very good shape last week when i first got back from the usa. jet lag, stress, lack of sleep, too much work…….makes me waaaaaaaaaay too sensitive/emotional. my therapist used to say that i would be inclined sometimes to use a nuclear bomb to stop a run-away milk truck when i got like that!

kvetch: we have a big potato director here from NYC this week who will take away time from my “real” work.

anti-kvetch: i REALLY like her!!

anti-kvetch: she will be gone Tuesday and most of Wednesday to a northern province and i can get real work done then.

anti-kvetch: mr hotbuns will be here on the 22cd of December!! today is the 10th, 6pm. that is LESS than 2 weeks away!!!

kvetch: most of the ex-pats are already gone or will leave this next week for the holidays (for at least a month), so i will have to do all of the renewal work for our funding narrative by myself.

anti-kvetch: i will get that work done MUCH faster by myself!!!

anti-kvetch: i FINALLY bought a mix master, a blender and a food processor! my maid laura will not know what to DO with herself tomorrow!!! ( i’m still sort of sensitive and weird about having a maid. please be gentle with me about that. i promise, i am a good person to work for. i PROMISE!)

*lets out deep breath*

please forgive me if i forgot anyone. i swear it was unintentional!!!

hugs and kisses and handfuls of baby guppy fishes!!!!
Wrote a huge long post and was in teh middle of typing a sentence and it disappeared...WTF?!!! I love you all, My minipixie is better...I'll try to remember everything I started to post and repost later...@#@&@%%$$$ post monster!
tes, I am all about the LoVe. Or maybe just the Lo... he is so incredibly and sexily bad and can still be a bit of an asshat at times and their relationship is never going to run smoothly but, god, those puppy dog eyes...
okay, kinkykatykins has my season one dvd but once I have it back I'm going to rewatch seasons one and two during the season three hiatus. hmmm, too much time on my hands?

dec 22nd you say? funny, that's when I get to see my boy again too - SQUEEeeeeeeeeeeeee!

amilta, we want updates!

*~*~*~*no rejection vibes for stargazer and polly~*~*~*~*
fly by...

Stargazer and other busties, it sounds like the Chicago party was a blast! smile.gif

Anyone wanting a Christmas card please PM me. I'm sending them out this week. I just need to buy some stamps.

So, I bought my parents some books, and not realizing that they had already read them. Thank goodness that I kept the reciept.

My work still sucks. But, I'm continueing to send out my resumes. I'm also researching grad schools still. Considering another one (UGA), which could mean a move to Athens, GA. However, it's a great college town.
McGeek also wants to move there to study math (that is if he's still in the picture by then)

((busty love))
~*~*~*~*~*~ love and acceptance and appreciation vibes for StarGazer and Polly and Raisin and Sidecar and Bunny and EVERYone! ~*~*~*~*~*~

The Chicagoland Bustie get-together sounds fab!

Yuefie, Mornington, & Sassy - I'd love to send cards to you, too! It'll make this chore a little more fun. happy.gif

Pixie, good to hear that K is feeling better!

Thank you all for the hair advice. Definitely appreciated! I told Sheff that you're all trying to convince me to pop my hair-dye cherry. biggrin.gif He finds it bizarre to think of me with dyed hair, though. I think I'll take Tes' advice and go for highlights first. Maybe Mom and I can go to her favorite fancy salon over the Christmas break and get our hair done together! Oh, that would be so much fun! I'm still super hesitant, though. As Tes & Pixie can tell you, I have dark, thick, straight hair. And lots of it. The thought of bleaching it scares the bejeezus out of me!

(((((Mandi))))) I know it's frustrating to hear this, but different people react in different ways to these drugs. I found that most people try 2 or 3 drugs before they find the one that works (Prozac was my Wonder Drug & it was the 3rd one I tried, but I know someone else who tried Prozac & it made him feel worse). It is really unfortunate that so many people have to do The Goldilocks Test with mind-altering drugs, but sometimes that's the best system they have to offer. Just keep the lines of communication open with your doctor/therapist. Let them know how you're feeling & if they think it's time to try something new, they'll certainly do it. It's definitely not unusual.

And congrats on the approaching niece or nephew!

Sidecar, in Tulsa they passed a law that said that in eating establishments, smoking is banned unless there is a seperately ventilated area specifically for smoking. However, smoking is still allowed in bars. And yes, I hate going out with friends & coming home smelling like an ashtray. It's even worse when you wake up feeling groggy on Sunday morning & you have that layer of filth clinging to your hair. And your eyelashes and tongue and bleeeeeeeh.

Tes, the place we went to is not in a barn (and I think I know where you're talking about when you say that, but that wasn't it!). This was a smaller place with the initials "J.V.'s" It's in a shopping center. I'd say it's about 10 minutes east of your place. Anyway, I hadn't heard of it before, but it was okay. The company was the best part. Sheff works with some fun folks.

And, there is nothing wrong with having a maid! And that is especially true when you're living in an area where a lot of people are stuggling to find work. I don't know if I mentioned it before, but my parents had a maid when they lived in Mississippi in the late '60s/early '70s. My mom felt kinda funny about it, but my dad was raised there & was taught that it was almost his duty to hire a black maid because there were so few job opportunities for black women in Mississippi at that time. This was back when my dad was a preacher, so you KNOW they weren't raking in the dough, but it was one of the ways that they supported the community. They moved away before I was born, but I remember us going back to visit their old maid when I was a kid. She became like family to us. smile.gif

And yes, bring on the piccies!

Kvetch: I really need to get back to writing out holiday cards. Some of them require letters (the Mother-in-law, Sheff's great aunt, etc.) & I'm trying desperately to think of unique ways of saying the same thing to the various members of the UK side of the family. And of course, Sheff isn't much of a help. Typical male. wink.gif

I am in the mood for hush puppies. Wonder where I could find some 'round these parts ...
Got to make this quick and so havn't read all the archives and just skimmed a bit. Sorry if I get this wrong, but wanted to address mando's comment. Yes, many antidepressants, while not specifically for anxiety, can have an antianxiety effect. I know it's true of me that my anxiety gets a lot worse when my depression is worse, though this can be a hard thing to connect as at times they feel so different. Anyway, this means that they can often have a very postive anti-anxiety effect. It does take time, and it can take some experimentation, like RV said. Stick with it.

I can't prescribe, so I cant speak from the standpoint of someone who does, but I have a lot of professional and personal experience with psych meds, so feel free to PM me if you want more information or have specific questions.

Also do give the therapy a try. It takes a while to make a real therapeutic connection, esp if it's a totally new thing for you, so be patient as best you can. You are worth it.

Anyway, just wanted to say I miss you all. My brief times here am mostly in the hip momma thread, so see that if anyone is dying for updates.
Hope to be back soon.

I'm so tired, ya'll...can I send out some ~~~general vibes~~~?

Our opening went really well...we didn't sell anything, but we got a good turnout (less than last time but well over 100 people) and people enjoyed the work. One photographer who is very good and successful said it was the best show here in the city in the last 4 years. Wow! Also, it was a good mix of the same and different people from the last opening.

Two of the artists...a married couple...makes movies, too, and we had 4 shorts looped and showing on a wall in the back. Last time our friend's band played...I think it's pretty cool to have something else going on besides the fabulous art on the walls!

Another good thing that came out of it is that we have folks approaching us to be in shows at our place...and one guy who did, we're having a show for him coming up in January. Another woman came to our show and she has cool, feminist photography and she seems to have agreed to exhibit at our place sometime.

Now for my lame kvetches...sometimes I feel like running the gallery is taking over my life! And between that and nursing...especially night shift, from which you have to be on a weird schedule and recover in a major way from your work...I feel like I barely have any time to try to do the things I want, like go to movies, learn to knit, rebuild some of my old friendships and make some new ones.

Like yesterday, we had to sit in the gallery all day (and as an aside, we had more people come than any other open day, so that was cool) but then the Mr. had to run around all day with the January artist guy so we couldn't even have a nice lunch together or something and then we had to go to some openings of other people's last night. I always have fun when we get there, but I tell ya, I would have rather stayed home last night.

Next weekend we are participating in an open studios event Sat and Sun AND we are doing an art market on Saturday!!! Good thing there are 3 of us. Geez, I guess it doesn't help that it's the holidays and I have all that stuff to do. And our car needs an oil change, new tires and the locks fixed (someone tried to break into it and now you can only unlock it from the hatchback lock!) all before we drive up to visit my family for XMas! Ai yi yi. One thing at a time, though, eh?

Off to someone else's open studio!! Good news is he's a good artist and we're going with this woman who I don't know well but think is really neato AND we may go out for a nice dinner afterwards. Ya'll are making me want Indian food, but I don't think that's happening...I just want to sit and relax, I don't care so much what we eat, really.
amilita: glad to hear that the opening went so well, and that you have other artists wanting to exhibit on the horizon!

don't stress so much about what you need to do vs what you think you should be doing, and not having enough time for either! you just do whatever you can, and ALWAYS remember to take care of yourself FIRST! you have been through such a tramatic event/time/experience. it will take time to recover. baby steps. one foot, other foot. you are doing great. i admire you SO much. wub.gif

mando my heart: listen to anousshka. she knows a LOT. i'll try to get off of my arse and pm you about what i know. remember that i am not a clinician, either.....and that everyone is different. what works for one person may have the totally opposite effect on another. the truth is? the docs don't know WHY these ssri drugs work. so it has got to be hit and miss. this is why they call their jobs "practices". unfortunately, it means that they are practicing on US.

pixie, the bust post eating monster has gotten a LOT of us lately! it SUCKS. we know that you, and anoushh, are reading and vibing and we don't need to see the words to feel the love. promise. (i've also been lurking in the Ga Ga thread, to keep an eye on notbob and moxette. you are all such great mothers! just the fact that you are worried about these issues is proof! oh, and anoushh: i ADORE the icon of your sweet lily dog!)

rose: not sure i'll get around to posting the pix today. it is around 9:30pm here, and of course i am goofing off by busting instead of doing the work i should be doing. i know EXACTLY where you went. the steaks are good, if really spendy. and everything extra costs extra. the next time i am in town, we MUST go to the barn place. better food, great atmosphere, one of the BEST wine lists EVER. heeeee! i am still just so GIDDY that i have MET you!!!! and that i KNOW you!!! and your fabu hair!!! WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!

BUNNY!!!! i, too, am all about the LoVe!!!! now, you must remember, that i am an entire season behind you. so don't give anything away! i've been watching season two, though, and it is already obvious that VM has it BAD for BAD boy Logan. which is just fine. she's young. bad boys rocked my world when i was her age. they just make less than ideal husbands. which is also okay. i just got lucky, because mr. hotbuns WAS a bad boy when i met him! so that was all hot and bothersome. and now he can be but isn't always. which also rocks.

hugs and kisses and silly ciclids to EVERY bustie!!! that means YOU!!! and YOU!!! and, yes, youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu, tooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!
*blows kisses*

work sucks. i quit.
(ok, not really, my contract's up in two weeks)
so i'm also moving in two weeks. eek! i got no packing done this weekend, but i wasn't planning on it. next weekend, baby, next weekend.

i finally got myself skype, and find myself talking to tes more than i did when she was state-side (at least, since getting it!) and i find it deliciously ironic!

lime is a fucking nut. but now he's on happy pills and seeing a therapist, and i don't even know this new lime. i don't know if it was the distance or the year since i've really spent time with him, but he's a completely different person. it's not entirely bad, because he's finally got a job in line with what he wants to do in the long term and has stopped acting like it's *my* fault that he was a stupidhead with a fly that couldn't stay up... but that job had him moving back to my home town. which also, is not entirely bad, because i really don't have many friends my age there, let alone ones that really, really know me.

on the limey note, over labor day i dropped my former engagement ring off to be reset. it was ready last week. about twenty minutes before my bro went to pick it up, the store was robbed and the ring was stolen. my mom's friend, who operates the store & does the jewelry designing, got conked on the head, and her DIL got tied up and had a knife at her throat. v. traumatic, and i count my blessings my bro wasn't there.

and did i mention work is insane? the union's striking (has been for more than a month now), so they pulled the salaried workers onto the plant floor. my manager wanted to swap my in but realized i'm not certified to drive, so he couldn't. shame, pays more and i'd get paid for ot. and double ot. busy busy little bee. now that i'm in my last two weeks, i'm not going to work any more ot (but don't tell them that). the sad note is that i haven't seen anyone i worked with the first 5 1/2 months of my internship for a month, and i won't get to say good bye to them in person.

oh, and i did a massive cut over thanksgiving. my hairs were back to boob length, and now they're layered between ear nad shoulder, with side swept bangs. i likes. did a slight color job (darker brown), too, but i think i'm not going to keep that next time.

and on the hair note, rosie, you should totally go for it. whatever wacky color floats your boat! as others noted, if you hate it, you can always dye over it.
good to see you, q - thanks for the update. sorry work blows. and even sorrier to hear about you and lime (which i somehow missed, methinks) and the robbery. glad it wasn't worse though.

polly, i'm no longer a redhead - that was several years ago - i'm back to my sassy tri-color golden blonde now (with dark underneath). and rose, i'm the queen of highlights, so i'd definitely advocate going to a salon and getting it done right the first time. if i remember your particular shade of brown, i think some lighter brown or even caramel highlights would be perfect. not too drastic, but just enough for some oompfh & something different. these will also grow in naturally. if you go too light, you'll have roots within 4 weeks. be careful of the bleach. it will wreck your hair. if you wanted to head down blondey blonde lane, you can get nearly the same effect with a warm blonde color instead of bleach. it will be more golden than ash. if it's a good salon, put yourself in the colorists hands. they know what they're doing. bringing photos is a good idea, too.

amilita, glad to hear the opening went well. and enjoy your relaxing time, you deserve it.

tes, not to worry about pm-ing me. i don't mean to pressure you. i'm just at a loss about the "happy pills", despite my research. and yes, part of the reason i've been reluctant to even consider meds is the guinea pig factor.

annoush, thank you for delurking for me. i was going to PM you, but i don't want to pressure you either. you have so little time these days. would love a notbob update, when you get a chance.

i had a long talk with my sis today, and i wound up spilling, even tho i didn't want to burden/make her worry. i knew she suffered from anxiety and depression also, but i didn't know some of the details, or how many meds she's tried. i also didn't know my bro probably has an anxiety disorder (i always assumed it was ADD), or that two of my cousins do, also. it's a little reassuring to know i'm not as alone as i thought, and that there's a reason i'm a nervous nelly, but i'm also a little freaked that it's more in my genes than i realized. anyway, sis had some good advice. and it felt good to bond over this, as twisted as it may sound.

okay. back to decorating. even tho my heart ain't in it. le sigh.
RV, go for it! I dyed my hair for years and years. It's one of the easiest and cheapest ways to give yourself a new, fun look, and if it goes awry, it'll wash out pretty quickly. If you're nervous, start with semi-permanent, as that will only last two weeks or so. Highlights are a good baby step, too, but they are a bit trickier to do at home and much more expensive at the salon.

Glad to hear festivus was a good time, polly! My friend got a palm tree from the SkyMall catalog for his Christmas tree this year, so we helped him set that up and decorate it.

((tes))) So good to see you in here! Also, I'll back you up on something. I use a housecleaning service myself. It's not quite the same, but it's similar. I feel bad about it, but you know, it's a lot less stressful for me, and the service I use does a great job, much better than I could. I make sure to tip heavily (usually 25-30 percent), always offer the woman something to drink, and really, do whatever I can to help. We'll do something extra for her for Christmas. I feel kinda bourgeois about it, but you know, I'm a pretty generous person to others I know and to causes I believe in, I donate money to animal shelters and food banks and NARAL, I do a lot for my friends ... this is one of the few things I do to make my life easier, and I know that I'm helping someone who would have a hard time finding a job to get one (our cleaning lady is a Polish immigrant).

Oh, yeah, our smoking ban is completely half-assed. It only applies to restaurants for now, and if the restaurant has a bar, smoking is allowed at the bar area. Taverns and restaurants with bars don't have to comply until July 2008. A few places that we go to in our neighborhood have voluntarily banned it, but not everyone is going to do it.

(((amilita)))) This time of year, anything that adds stress, even if it's good, is rough to deal with.
Carpet ban on all smoking indoors (public) across Scotland and it's bliss.

I've been dying my hair for many, many years (yeah I'm 25) and would recommend it, although find red really difficult to grow out. i say go to stylist to pop your cherry and maybe go for low lights at first as not so drastic? It freaks me out that I may be developing an intolerance to ammonia as i would be lost without my fun changes.
((((tes)))) I hear you on the maid thing. Growing up, our family had staff (yeah, I know, staff...) in almost all countries - it's standard in so many countries, and working for non-natives can be seen as a really good position.

((((mando)))) that sounds reassuring - not that it's in your genes, although I'm inclined to be reassured by news like that, but that you're definitely not alone.

((((amilita)))) yay for successful - that's such good news! - but boo on the tiredness. But what tes said, look after yourself first!

((((qspice)))) boo on lime and work sucking. but yay for updates!

((((anoushh)))) thinking of you! *goes to lurk in hip mama*

((((rose)))) work child *cracks whip* tongue.gif I'm so glad my mum still does the round robin letters...

((((sassy)))) crossing fingers still!

((((stargazer)))) for you too! and yay on the festivus, it sounds such fun!

((((pixie, bunny, yuefie, sixe, billy, sidecar, polly, everyone))))

guess what... F has bought me a christmas present! I know it's silly, but considering we've never properly met - 'cos talking on the phone doesn't count - I'm so touched. And he's fretting I won't like it biggrin.gif Only now I have to go find him something...

I'm off shopping after my exam tomorrow - it's multiple choice and I haven't studied enough. I never do, but still...

oh, oh, we met a shar pei at puppy classes today. Indigo was totally freaked by the wrinkly bundle, but I just squealed and made a fuss... they are so cute. And I got puppy kisses from a golden retriever - so did Indigo, but he didn't like them... although he's gotten so much better and more confident. The trainers really love him - he's such a little star, even if he won't sit or stay. He'll stand and lean though laugh.gif .

(((((kvetchies))))) I'm sending hugs and all-purpose vibes for you all
((polly)) Your hair looks nice. I used to dye my hair red, but now I just dye it dark brown. The sun lightens it up so much though, sometimes it looks auburn. Glad you had fun with the Chicago Busties.

((sassy)) Hope you find a job where they treat you right, and yay for grad school.

((rose)) Sorry you felt sick before the party, but glad you went and had a fun time. Thanks for asking about Mr. DM, he likes being back, but he is once again looking for a full time office type job. He just hasn’t had much job luck since he moved here in 2004, and he wants to be able to contribute equally. I don’t know if I mention we are living with my parents for now until probably the beginning of the year, and that doesn’t do anything for his confidence. It will be ok though.

((raisin)) Yay for hot dance teachers.

((mornington)) F bought you a present, awwww.

((F)) Easy moving.

((bunny)) Are you watching the new VM episodes on the internet or are they on tv?

((mando)) Gift boxes are the perfect idea. I suck at wrapping. About meds, I took Zoloft for sometime, and it made me feel out of it. I tried Lexapro, and it made me constipated. I stopped taking any anti-depressants/anti-anxiety meds because I hate taking ills especially if they don’t help me. They can help people though.

((star)) Sorry about the rejection letter. Hope you had fun with the Chicago Busties.

((tesao)) Yay for Mr. HB’s impending visit.

((amilita)) Glad the opening went well, but I can see how it would be overwhelming.

((sidecar, yuefie, pixie, anoushh, quantum))

For those who lose posts, do what I do write it in Word or something and then copy and past it over.

This weekend was nice. Friday night Twin DM and I watched this film called The Woods, it was scary, but interesting. Saturday I went to Forever 21, and bought a dress, shirt, earrings and some presents for Twin DM. Almost everything I bought was on sale. I am done with my Christmas shopping. Saturday night Mr. DM and I went to see this comedienne called Suzanne Westenhoefer. She was hilarious, and we laughed so much. Before the show we had barbeque for dinner. Today was a lazy day, lunch out.

Okay, I'm beginning to think I need to not have so much fun and good times on the weekends so that the Monday Shocker isn't so bad. So not looking forward to the freaking soap opera that is my office. wacko.gif I despise most of my coworkers.

I'm totally smitten with Indigo as well.

Ok..finally decided to try again....
Mando..I agree with everything that has been said of the antidepressants. I was on Prozac first and it wiped out my short term memory, and sex drive and I felt high a good portion of the time, After a copuple of months, I switched to lexapro. It worked really well for me and several other people I know, but antidepressants seem to be really fickle about the people they help vs the people they make worse.

(((depressed Busties))) Mr. Pixie is suffering his own funk lately. I am really hoping he doesn't have to go on meds. The didn't work well the last time.

I mentioned earlier that my minipixie is better.,..Mr. Pixie's is still dealing with teh lice. eewww! And wow, Mando, I had not even considered the stuffed animals have lice and that really squicks me out to think about! T loves her stuffed animals so much is would be very tramatic, but MIL said there is something you can use on stuffed animals these days.

Rose...I wrote a bunch of stuff about the hair coloring earlier...I really think you would look great with some highlights! It really hasn't damaged the texture of my hair too much..and gosh, I think I've been dyeing my hair almost as long as I've known you!

Amilita, I'm glad the openings have been going so well! It sounds like it was a lot of fun!

(((busties with job woes)))

(((Tes , Bunny, Yuefie, Mornington, Stargazer, DM, Sybrite, faith , fina, polly, pink, and everyone else)))
Woot! One of the artists in this show just emailed to say we got written up in this week's free weekly paper!!! That's big, baby. I'd go out and get one right now and get one, but I'm not sure what business open now has them...I know all the coffee shops have 'em, so I'll run out in the morning and get a bunch. Yipee!

Oh, I've been meaning to say...Hair Dye! Yes! Yes! I dyed my hair red for over 10 years and loved it...I always used Naturcolor in Cayenne get it in the health food store, but it's not just a henna dye. It has henna, but other stuff, too. It makes your hair real silky soft, too.

I must say, I'm a big fan of people going just a tad darker if their hair is brown...I think it can look so dramatic and striking like that. Does anyone remember celophanes? Back in the 80s? They were great on dark hair...when the sun hit your hair, it would glow with, purple, whatever. Rosev, if those are still around, that may be a good way to dip your toe into the world of color.

Everyone's been giving really good antidepressant can be tricky to find the right one and right dose, but they can do so much for people. Can also get you through a tough time or give you the ability to tackle stuff in therapy even if you don't need them forever.

(((all the kvetchies with anxiety and depression)))

My therapist has been giving me good, concrete advice to help me keep from letting my anxiety snowball, but I was writing in this post about it and I'm not sure if it is translating well...I like her behavioral approach; it works well for me. I'll try again to write about it if anyone's interested.
I was on Zoloft for about 6 months- worked for the depression, but took my sex drive away with it. I went off it cold turkey (BIG mistake- when they say you need to ween yourself off of it, they mean it!) and tried Effexor for about 3 days, but I was so nauseated from it, that I just stopped taking it. No effects from coming off that- I don't think I was on it long enough for it to do anything, but by that time I was pretty okay again and didn't need to be on meds. That was over 5 years may be time to go back on them, but we'll see. I heard back from the private therapist I emailed. Seems her idea of sliding scale is dropping her normal rate of $135/hour to $80/hour. Ha, ha! I can't spend $80 on groceries right now! Still waiting to hear from the facility I used to go to.

Lice in the stuffed animals? ((shudder)) Couldn't you just boil them? I'd be devastated, even now, if I had to throw away all my stuffed animals. Couldn't you just quarantine them, like out in the garage? I mean, even if they did lay eggs in them, once they figured out there was no blood to live off of, wouldn't they just leave or die? I suppose the thought of stuffed animals with dead lice in them is kinda gross, but we live with dust mites all over, all the time. Do lice live off blood, like fleas? I was fortunate enough to never have lice as a child.

Yay for your artist, amilita!

((Sidecar, Mornington & Tes)) I wouldn't feel bad about having a maid/housecleaning service. I *wish* I could have one, just to do the few chores I HATE doing, like mopping. I just wouldn't go with one of those services, like Molly Maid or what's the one with the yellow and green logo? If you've ever read Nickel and Dimed by Barbara Ehrenreich, you'll know why- they treat and pay their employees like shit, and they DON'T clean your house. They just move dirt around and spray air freshener to make it seem clean. I'd much rather hire an independent person who knows the importance of hot water. My grandparents have their house cleaned every 2 weeks, like you Sidecar, by a Polish lady, who they've had for about 12 years. Before that they had the same lady who would watch my dad and uncle (both my grandparents worked full time), so she was with them for about 20 years. They pay them very well, and are pretty friendly with them. No Emily Gilmores 'round here!

ETA: Yuefie & Mornington- I PM'ed you about Christmas cards- did you get it? Anyone else exchanging?

ETA, again: I spent all this time at my parent's house tonight digging out Christmas cards from years past....then while I'm sitting here counting them, hoping there's enough (more than!) I see 3 boxes, ones I never used, hidden behind some stuff on my desk....I don't even remember when I bought them! Did I buy them before last Christmas and not use them? Did I buy them afterwards and was going to save them for this year? Who knows....I really need to clean my desk more often....yeah, plenty of cards- who wants one????
Tes and Mornington, I've heard arguments supporting hiring domestic staff in South Africa, as a way of supporting the local community. In a much simplified nutshell, I can see it reinforcing societal inequity there but if it provides solid and steady wages (and crucially in many cases, health care) then overall it can be positive... from what I've heard anyway.

Nickel and Dimed is awesome, btw, but yeah, it would put me off hiring from a agency. Finally, I know a woman who was studying in the US; it was illegal for her to work so she worked under the table as a cleaner--it seemed to work well for her and the people she cleaned for.

(((Amilita))) Glad to hear your therapist is giving you something tangible to work with, and congrats on the paper coverage!

RV, I too support dyeing hair and experimenting a bit. My current dark brunette is close-ish to my own colour, but it's been so long since I've seen it that I can't be sure... biggrin.gif

Am sending out the last of my xmas cards today, then have to settle down to absolutely-last-call-deadline this Friday. Busy week ahead!

I support smoking bans, even though I still smoke when I'm out (or try to, it's illegal here too), because all that smoke is a serious health risk for anyone working 8 hours at a stretch in that environment. I've also always thought it unfair for people who don't smoke to go home smelling of it--at least in my case I bring it on myself. Out of interest Mando, please to tell how you overcame your cigarette addiction? With people quitting all around me I'm thinking I should stop too...
QSpice! Darling! So good to see you in here! ((((((( smooches & cuddles for Q ))))))
So you're moving again? What is the new destination? Are you going back to the hometown? If so, that means you'll be very close to Lime, yes? Hmmmm ... dry.gif well, I'm glad to hear he's making an effort, but I'd still be wary. Therapy is a wonderful thing, but he needs to be truly dedicated to the results. Gotta make sure he isn't on a Therapy High, if that makes any sense.
~~~~~~ healing and soothing of all sorts for the people at the jewelry store ~~~~~~
How terrifying! So glad your brother wasn't there.
Oh, and I'm imagining your new cut on your sweet face & it sounds so fab!

Amilita, you are doing soooooo so much for your community, both with your work as a nurse and your efforts to enliven the art community. Your efforts are worthy of much admiration and appreciation ... and, of course, the occasional day off! (((((Amilita))))

Thanks for checking in, Anoushh!
((((((A & Mr. A & little Not Bob))))))
By the by, there is this song by Pink Martini called "Lilly" that always reminds me of your puppers. Here are some of the lyrics:
Lilly comes when you stop to call her
Lilly runs when you look away
Lilly leaves kisses on your collar
Lilly Lilly Lilly Lilly stay!


Pixie, the lice will definitely get into the stuffed animals! When I got lice as a kid, my mom had to wash all of my stuffed animals and, of course, wash all of the bed clothes & coats & hats & ... well, you get the point.

Mandi, Amilita makes a good point. Starting the Prozac was a huge turning point in my recovery. That was definitely when the darkness began to lift. The meds can help.

((((Cuddles for Tes)))) Just 'cause she's so adorable!

For those who liked Nickel& Dimed, did you know that the same author wrote a book about people having trouble finding work after college? I can't remember the title, but BestGalPal read it & enjoyed it .... although "enjoyed" isn't exactly the right word, but you know what I mean.

((((((((ALL of you))))))))

Kvetch: I did not sleep well last night. Not at all. Usually, when I fall asleep I stay asleep all night long, but last night I woke up at least 3 times & had tons of trouble getting back to sleep. I kept having these vivid dreams that were so exhausting & it was hard to let them go once I'd woken up. Uuuuuuugh.

Anti-kvetch: My brother got off of work for Christmas! So our whole family will get to be together until 3pm when Dad goes to work.
Woot for the write up Amilita!

As for lice in the stuffed animals MIL said if you put them in a trash bag and spray them with something, they are fine after 24 hours. I must say, I don't envy Mr. Pixie's ex...both her daughters have it...and she has a newborn to deal with and she's a single mother! But it sounds liek teh live lice are dead now and it is just a matter of pickign out all the dead eggs. (still makes my head itch everytime I think about it!)

Yay for Roses brother getting off work on Christmas...can you believe it is only 2 weeks away!!!

Sybright, have you tried the gum or the patch? I've known several people who quit that way.

rose, that is good news indeed, that you're whole family will be together for xmas. but color me a little jealous. *sniff* and i hereby declare that you get a nap today. broken sleep is best mended by an afternoon nap. then again, i'm a diehard napper, so i'm biased.

if i could afford a housecleaner, i'd be so there, it would make your head spin. despite the fact that my mum cleaned an office for over 10 yrs (excellent money, off the books), and i'd go help every once in a while, but i HATED going, especially during the winter, so i didn't clean very thoroughly. windex alone can't clean a toilet, but i didn't give a flying fuck. and yes, this will be one of the reasons why i go to hell. tongue.gif

sybarite, i've always been a social smoker, more so in the company of other smokers and alcohol. i was never truly addicted. the mr and i actually quit cold-turkey in college, from 1981 until i stupidly started up again in 1997 or so. with the advent of smoking bans and my lack of ashtray/ighter in my latest camry, my smoking just sort of "naturally" dwindled. plus, the mr was smoking way more than i, and had developed a ghastly cough. i cut down to support him as well. but i still crave one when i'm out and about and imbibing, so i indulge myself. i'm curious to see what happens when i hang out with nutsogalpal again (our friendship is on another hiatus). she's a chain-smoker. (she also sounds like 69-yr old suzanne pleshette, and she's only 36. so.not.good.)

that said, i still see smoking bans as discriminatory. and yes, the hypocrisy is not lost on me. cool.gif

amilita, i'm all ears about anything you'd like to share about anxiety.

although, i think i need to stop researching. i just read a bunch of meds stuff, and it's done nothing but boggle my feeble little brain even more. i read sentences like, "Lorazepam and other benzodiazepines act by enhancing the effects of gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA) in the brain", and my brain hears wahwahwah, wahwahwahwah (in the charlie brown adult cartoon voice). so methinks i'm about to slide headlong into obsessionville, and should just rely on my doc and therapist ... period. and bustie advice too, of course.

i'm more than a little curious about raisin's too-much-fun weekend ... ?
One of the eye-openers in Nickled and Dimed is that the *policy* of the cleaning company was to not use enough water that your floor could remotely be clean.

Qspice? Really? I've been meaning to ask her if she took any courses from Mr. Dusty's cousin. I thought Lime got kicked to the curb?

OMG. The million and one good reasons (((Mandi))) would be anxious *shakes fist at Mandi's employer*. I had panic attacks after my dad died.
PLEASE please please please head over to the Perilous Position of Choice thread to sign a few major petitions against that anti-choice/anti-birth control fucker that Bush appointed as the head of Health and Human Services and Family Planning!

(sorry for the interruption!) Thank You!
I use a service, but it's locally owned and operated; our building manager recommended them to us. He's known the owners for a long time. Because we have it done irregularly, we don't always get the same person but we often get the same lady just because she likes us. They're also really great about our pets. The vacuum sets our dog off, and the women who come in are always very understanding and sweet about it.

*waves to qspice* Girl, I cannot keep up with all your jobs and moving.

Crazy uncle's funeral is tomorrow. I told my mom I wasn't going and she was totally understanding, as was my grandmother. I'm glad the rest of my family isn't unreasonable.

Two of my editors sent me giant boxes of fancy chocolates today. And you know what? It was awesome. I totally deserve them. I'm sharing them with my coworkers because I'm nice like that. I need to really back away from the See's toffee chocolates, though.

DM, I've been watching VM on illegal download, season 2 has just finished here on cable.

Polly, I'm exchanging (well, just sending - I'm not expecting anything in return) so PM me! that goes for everyone else! I had to buy extra cards and bought v cute ones that I know my kvetchies will love (especially raisin and mornington).

mornington, asda (the evil walmart) have a gorgeous santa suit and hat for dogs, I thought of indigo as a greyhound is the model for the outfit.

yay for chocolates and being appreciated!

*waves as q'spice*

amilita, go you!

I've been lucky with the 2 antidepressants so far and only changed due to the nightmares. My anxiety and motivation levels seem to be improving with the occasional blue day.

Have had a lovely day: lord farquhar and I went to see The Holiday and had tapas for lunch then I met the boy's mum for coffee and some Christmas shopping (one last day on Friday -payday- and I'm finished!)

Been a bit nauseous and lightheaded but it may be cos crimson tide due.

i am so frikkin' sick --yet i'm at work since we have a board meeting/ x-mas party that is mandatory this year -it's a long story but there were issues w/the staff and board. anyhoo, i feel like creamed crap. and i'm sucking on this nasty-ass cough drop which i guess it better than hacking. yuck! one of my co-workers brags about coming in even though she's sick --well i think she fuckin' made me sick now! argh!!! i think i might try to take tomorrow off but on wed. i have a board meeting after work w/the humane society --and i missed their party on sunday and feel bad so i want to try to go. and to make things worse my brother is coming on the 18th and my house is a wreck--especially the guest room! and i have to give him his and the rest of my families gifts when he leaves on the 21st- and i don't have most of them. ugh. and the mr. is sick too!

love all around, i'd hug you but then you might get sick!

i was so tired yesterday that i didn't post. saturday was alot of fun! i really wish i could've eaten polly's chocolate peppermint browines. they looked and smelled divine.

Pixie~my cousin had bad headlice about 2 times. there is a spray and some kind of wash used for linens. everything their heads come into contact with should be washed. seriously. or else the lice will keep coming back. it is pretty serious stuff. you should do the same if the kid has been at your place.

on the meds front...i'm on is good for depression and anxiety. i'm really sensitive to meds and i was just a little sleepy in the beginning, but now, i feel no side effects from them.

((mando)) yeah, i knew i needed meds because there is an extensive amount of anxiety disorders on my mother's side of the family. i had to get out of my own denial too. the research is mind boggling, but it will help you in the long run. i only know of these meds 'cause my clients were on alot of different meds.

((sidecar)) it sounds like you made the best decision for you by not going to the funeral. i'm glad your family is supportive too.

chocolates and sweets...gosh, i want 'em so bad...oh, and a cup of joe...

i forgot the big news...I GOT AN INTERNSHIP INTERVIEW! it is still hard for me to fathom. it is scheduled for the middle/end of january. the site is in san antonio, texas. it feels good for having at least one interview under my belt. thanks for all the good vibeage! keep it comin'!

((tes, amilita, anoushh, designermedusa, qspice, mornington, yuefie, raisingrl, sassygrrl, faith, sybarite, sonik, and other kvetchies))
Polly, I didn't get your PM - I'll pm you in a minute and see if it works!

If I could afford it, I would love to have someone to clean. I'm terrible at it and hate doing it - dusting especially. If I can afford it one day, I probably will - it's providing a job for someone. As syb said, in south africa, while it did make for a real inequality, a lot of the poorer were willing to work to provide for themselves, thier kids and that. The embassy had an advised wage (usually higher than the local average for domestic staff) and a list of staff - our maid used to do three or four embassy houses in a week. I used to hate that you'd see all these young guys selling coat hangers or soft drinks or whatever, but the poor white afrikaaners wouldn't even do that. they'd just beg.

yay for chocolates ((((sidecar))))
((((crassy)))) boo on being ill! get better soon
((((raisin)))) I want to hear about this good weekend. spill.
((((pixie)))) there is definitely something. We used to put tea tree oil in our hair along with conditioner to prevent nits at boarding school and we didn't have major breakouts that often (and with 100 girls in the same building...)
yay for reviews ((((amilita))))) is it online?
((((rose)))) yay for family christmas!
yay for ((((bunny)))))'s lovely day. I haven't seen that... but I'm nowhere near an asda. don't tempt me.
(((((stargazer))))) yay for the interview!

((((mando)))) ooh yes, napping! I love my naps. And pharmacology makes my head spin, and I'm supposed to understand it. It's all to do with levels of neurotransmitters, usually in the brain - these little chemicals that do everything from make you go "ow" to "ooh, happy happy joy joy"... basically, the meds adjust the levels, depending on whether you've got too much, not enough, or it's just not getting through. This is why different people react to different meds - it's really hard to know if it's because GABA's not getting through or you're overreacting to something else and so on and so on... So you have to go through until you find something; they start with prozac because it affects the most common chemicals involved in emotion.

antikvetch: getting 80% in my exam

kvetch: just feeling a little... gripey. Grr. For no real reason.

antikvetch: getting my christmas card from sonik! It's absolutely beautiful! thank you thank you thank you!

((((pixie & mini-pixies)))) Oh how I feel for your plight. Having been a preschool teacher, I am all too familiar with the headlice plague. We had a really bad bout with it one year because one family was not properly eradicating it, so the little boy kept bringing it back. Nix is the best shampoo to go with, as the little bastids have become immune to Rid. Do use the spray, vaccuum well, wash EVERYTHING in hot, HOT water, and seal all stuffed animals in plastic bags for at least 2 weeks. It's a good idea to wash them after the quarantine period as well. There are special combs for egg removal and also this stuff that is supposed to make the combing out of the nits much easier. Wish they would have had that when I was dealing with it in my VERY thick, curly, waist length hair. I ended up chopping my hair off to above my shoulders because I couldn't afford all the bottles of treatment I kept needing. When we finally figured out who it was that kept reinfecting the entire school, I wanted to hand the parents a bill!

((((crassy))))) ~~~~feel better~~~~

yay for bustie get togethers and naps. naps are such a good thing. I am wishing for one with all my might right about now *yawn*

(((((mandi, polly, bunny, sidecar, stargazer, mornington, rose, amilita, dusty, raisin, sassy, sixela, qspice, pink, dm, flanker, anoushh & not-bob, tes, faith, syb, fina, billy, plummie, msp, everyone))))

be back later to kvetch a little more thoroughly.

I'm not sure why employing a housecleaner should have more of a stigma than daycare, or even eating in a restaurant. They should all pay a living wage.

Mr. Dusty met with a South African union representative recently who told him that there is, can't remember the exact figure, somewhere around 50% unemployment in South Africa.
I don't know what it's like in the states, but good private cleaners over here can ask for a really good wage. I think employing someone to clean your loo is going against lefty-leaning principles in some way, left over from when you were either above or below stairs. I always feel faintly embarrassed about it, anyway, especially when I say daft things like "my ayah (nanny) used to..." and then people look at me strangely. blink.gif Admittedly, mum wasn't working back then... but the staff came with the house and they carried on when we left.

And official unemployment is SA is ridiculous... but that figure sounds about right.
((((sidecar)))) I've been meaning to say that I empathize with your feelings about your uncle. I too have an uncle I feel like that about. He once told me that he would lock me in his van and set it on fire. I was three at the time. He now lives in Las Vegas. When I was out there in June I spent the entire time looking over my shoulder while walking through the casino, because my sister had unknowingly booked us in the hotel of the casino he frequents. Nobody in the family has any contact with him except for my grandfather, and even he can barely stand it. He has to be one of the nastiest, negative people I've ever known. I know he is very sick and completely alone and I really can't even bring myself to feel even a twinge of guilt. C'est La Vie.


We put up our enormous tree, Brutus, tonight. He is called Brutus because he's too big for the living room and is hulking up at least half of my dining area! PJ picked it out, I would never had gotten one so huge for our small place if I had been paying attention. Still no word from AHK on my christmas stuff, so we went ahead and decorated with my cousins gf's stuff. We all went out over the weekend to look at lights and picked up the tree then. They volunteered to bring their decorations over so we could all have fun putting them up. I made chili for dinner, banana cake for dessert and all in all it was a very fun & festive evening smile.gif

That's true dusty and mornington... having a cleaner has all these connotations of 'I'm too good to clean my own floor/loo' etc. It's a service like anything else, commodified for people with more money than time. if anything, I think the concept of personal service has expanded with things like a personal trainer and even a vegetable delivery service in some cities, which brings boxes of fruit n' veg to the door of those busy professionals.

I don't mind cleaning because the physical side of it is kind of mindless. I put on music and run around the place for an hour or two. Saying that, I would have no hesitation in hiring a cleaner (and paying a decent wage/fee) if I felt we could do with one, or maybe before I moved in somewhere new.

Sonik, I got your card too, thanks! Witty as well as beautiful, you talented lady you!

Feel better soon crassy!

Back to work...
(((yuefie))), your tree decorating festivities sound fabulous.

(((stargazer))) yay for you!!! all parts crossed.

(((crassy))) feel better soon!

I suppose the feelings some of you have towards your uncles I have towards my father (the sperm) so I can empathise to an extent, he's not even on my radar as exisiting.

boo-hoo, I missed out on sonik's cards sad.gif . I posted a bunch out today and hopefully they will reach some of you across the pond.

another four week line from work - yay! looks like I'm adjusting to the new anti-depressant too.

kvetch: £21 (POUNDS!) for postage for parcel to Vancouver. Grrr.

anti-kvetch: my crazy cat mandoo. he makes me giggle so: earlier he had gone into my bedroom and I heard a noise and asked him if he was okay, when he didn't answer I went in to see and couldn't find him, I called for him and heard more noises and then his head and front paws materialised between the metal bar headboard of my new bed and he pulled himself up and squeezed through. goodness knows what he was thinking and how he got behind and under the headboard in the first place.

*flies through thread in nothing but nude knickers and nipple pasties* biggrin.gif

Christmas ball tonight!

yay for brutus ((((yuefie))))
((((syb, bunny, sonik, polly, rose, pixie, raisin, mando, dusty, crassy, dm, faith, star, sassy, sixe, candy, amilita, anoushh, billy, tes, qspice, msp, mavin, walkingb, txplum, flanker, everyone))))
I would get a housekeeper in heartbeat if I could afford it! Some people just don't have a cleaning gene...I am one of those! I do pretty good, but I have a mental block against folding laundry so it is usually in laundry baskets all over my bedroom. Mr. Pixie bought us a roomba rigth after we got married. (one of those robot vacuums) so we can just set that before we go to work and not worry about it which is nice. About as close to housekeeper as I can get rigth now. For Christmas my FIL is giving us the money to get an electrical problem fixed which will make our dishwasher and garbage disposal work again, so then I will really be in heaven!

***giggles at the image of Mornington in nude knickers and pasties***

Yuefie, dontcha just love really big Christmas trees! Unfortuntely my ceilings in this house are only 8 ft, so I have to stick to a 6-7 ft tree.

((stargazer)) Good luck!

(((bunny, Rose, sybrite, crassy, Dm, amilita, and all)))

I got my card from Sonik- it's so lovely! I'm going to hang it up on the front hall closet door with my other cards!

((Hugs to all))
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