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Sixelacat, now you got me thinking about the world cup and how I wouldnt mind my own futbol player harem. Those matches sure got me in the mood (especially the italians, they just couldnt stop caressing each other huh?)

Anyway, glad to see there are some happy busties on here. My crush across the pond is gonna come see me in a month and I'm just sooo anxious. My friends say that I should fool around with other guys in the mean time, but, I dunno, other guys seem like small potatoes compared to my Brit. *crushing so hard here*
Yes AP, we plan to get lunch next weekend when both of us don't have to work. Free coffee is rad.

So leaving horrid day at work, and MySpace (Sonic Youth boy) calls me. I'm like WTF? because I've been trying to get in touch with him like for two weeks, and he decides to call when my SC boy is coming down....

Getting portions tonight!!!

Doing happy sex dance.... smile.gif
Hmph. Slight disturbance in Crushville.

I have been having a sleazy little fling w/workcrush for a month, and we clearly defined it as not exclusive and mostly just a fuck buddy/booty call kind of thing. I don't want a serious relationship right now, and I'm sorta semi-dating another guy. Workcrush recently ended a long-term relationship and has been on a tear, seriously sowing some wild oats.

It's all been pretty good, lots of fun, and we've been seeing each other 2-3 times/wk. Since our social lives don't intersect much, there hasn't been any awkwardness w/other, uh, involved parties, and though I know he's running wild a lot, it hasn't been in my face and I haven't felt jealous or weird about it.

Tonight, very late, he texted me (he often texts me late at night because he works in the service industry): "Bring something sharp." I texted back, "Why? What's going on?" I wait for a bit and he texts back, "oops."

Now I'm disturbed and wondering what exactly's going on over there tonight. Gah. What do you all think?

hmm, Edna, that's kind of weird. But, he could be talking about anything. Obviously the text was meant for someone else, so he could have been talking about something to open a cardboard box, or hell, he could have been talking about CHEESE! I wouldn't worry about it, unless he starts hinting at knife play during sex with you wink.gif

Hope everyone's enjoying their weekend portions (and getting seconds and thirds and fourths.....)

AP, the stars are already lookin' at me cock-eyed this month! I started my period on the full moon, which never happens....maude only knows what the nekkid voodoo dance could bring!

*looks around, half-expecting le Izzard on her doorstep....*
"Bring something sharp." Sharp? WTF does that *mean*? Turn up with a meat cleaver? A chainsaw? That's just straight up weird.

Went out with Jcrush last night. We need to just fuck & get it over with so we can get back to our regularly scheduled lives.

Hah! Thats funny edna. You HAVE to get the lowdown on it and tell us, we are all curious now...
Oh, I'm sure it's not about cheese! He owns kitchen knives.

Wondering if it could possibly be drug related?

I gotta quit thinking about it. Fuck. I'm glad that I at least have a Plan B man to divert my focus a little...

lyrics to the Kropotkins song that keeps running through my head:

I got a man. I got a man.
He says he wants to give me
love and affection
I don't pay him no attention
Cause I got another man
Yeah, I got a man.
OH! drunken revealing email from the long-distance highschool sweetheart crush. dang, dang, dang it all, MRREEOOOOWWWW!!

ok, and i am making it recently with mr used-to-be-my-sort-of-boss-at-the-small-shop-i-worked-at-during-the-holidays crush. a little bit of something fine to keep me busy this summer and also while i absolutely obsess over this past love interest.

i love boys.
message from HGF today telling me that he is back in town...

message from Mr. HMCHH today telling me that he will be in town (unexpectedly) this week...

and a friend with (sometimes - on and off) benefits is going to be in town next week.

it's raining boys. I tell ya.

got into a discussion via text today w/Mr. HMCHH that was a little too deep for me - and unfortunately, the deep revealing part was on my side. Dammit. Friends, yes, but showing part of my psyche (in print, no less) this quickly, no. Wanna keep it light and fun and hopefully get to be friends. Not me looking like I'm jumping in the deep end when I'm not. fuck. Hope I didn't scare him. Cause he's Hott Hott Hott and I wanna give him another geography lesson. ha!
Warning---bitchy post ahead!

Message from sexy professor today telling me that he was in France celebrating his 58th birthday... and wanted to go out drinking with me. I got a VM from Starbucks boy and Sonic Youth boy called me on Friday night.

SC boy and I got into MEGA fight this weekend when we had to discuss the status of our relationship. It was a three hour fight, and we still didn't really come up with any solid answers. I almost broke it off with him. I mean I can't wait around to see if he wants to date me. I think he is afraid that he knows that he has competition. Although, I don't really mind the distance (apparantly he does more than me) and he knows I'm a flirt. But asking me weird shit in the middle of my drunken rage like could he look at other woman and mentioning marriage.... to me? I was so like WTF? I just wish that we could somehow get on the same page. I know that we hooked up too soon, but we can't erase the past. He wants to start writing me letters to help our relationships. I mean christ I don't want to have a husband, I just want a boyfriend.

The sad thing is that I only really want to date him, but if he doesn't want me, he doesn't want me. I keep making it clear that I had other offers. This probably pissed him off, but I wanted to tell him that I'm not sitting in my apartment waiting for the phone or an email you know? Ironic, that we were having a huge fight about sex and love while both in our underwear. In a weird way, I guess it was a good thing. He now knows how I fight, and can figure out if he really wants me. But, he's going have to totally KISS my ass for a while. He tried a little on Sunday (bought my friends and I lunch, bought me some shit at Target....), because he knew that he really was a dick the night before.

I think I'm going to make another date with Sonic Youth boy and Starbucks boy this week. Not to make SC Boy (I probably won't even tell him, b/c he got pissed at me for telling him about Sonic Youth Boy, even when he asked it) jeolous, but I need some flirting. I mean I have no idea if he's fucking a million woman in SC. He does live in a college town.

He's supposed to be coming up in another two weeks. We're supposed to go camping, but I'm not holding my breath. I'm being very whatev about the whole situation.

Fucking ass. mad.gif Why are all men such dicks?

sassy, i keep hoping its because we wouldnt know the good times if we didnt have such bad ones. it's the only thing i can come up with sad.gif .
hey ladies,

is it wrong that i as a 30 year old have a crush on a 19 year old?

cuz if it is, i don't want to be right.

luckily he doesn't live in the same state as i do.
lily -

if you read thru the archives, you'll see that none of my boys are less than 10 years younger than me.... heh heh.

I say, have at!!!

he's legal. well, in the statuatory way anyway...

yay boys!
this current squeeze of mine is 10 years younger. couldn't give a rats ass, really. he is fine, fine, fine and certainly growed up enough to make it with me. heh.
ok all... I need some lovin.

I have been sick, I feel gross, I swear to god my thighs have spread in the last week from being sick and having to sit on my ass, I am PMSing all to hell and I F**KING HAVE ALL THE BOYS COMING INTO TOWN AT ONCE!!! f**k. I wasn't expecting to see ANY of them for at least a couple of weeks when I am nice and recovered and bled and all that stuff.

I need to get it together and become fabulous again in like 36 hours.

I need a pep talk, girls! bustie vibes! any advice on getting your groove on quickly!

because I need to be the tower of awesomeness that I am, dang it! smile.gif
(((((((((ZOYA)))))))))) ((((((((((ZOYA)))))))))) ((((((((((ZOYA))))))))))

*AP dons cheerleader outfit & waves pompoms*

Are you ready? Okay!

Hey Zoya! *clap clap clap*
What do ya say? *clap clap clap*
Are ya ready to kick some ass today?
You have the license to rock this joint,
You'll rock it all day til they get the point!
Break it down now!

*waves pompoms, does kicks*
~~~~ cool.gif ~~~ cool.gif ~~~~fabulous and cool vibes for zora~~~~ cool.gif ~~~ cool.gif ~~~~

dunno if this would work for you, but a run (or walk, bike ride, whatever) then a full-on home spa treatment (steam facial, hair treatment, blah blah blah) gets me feeling all luscious again when I feel like shite....

hmmm, everybody in town all at once, interesting. so, are you going to group date Hef style, or line 'em up one by one? Could be fun either way.....

~~~~~extra condoms and batteries for zora~~~~~
oh hell, I dunno.

good god, I just started bleeding. 24 hours before Mr. HMCHH gets here. and it's not like I know him well enough to feel comfortable with the blood thing. yuk.

and I have a new project I just took on since last week and it all of a sudden is dumping work on me. (last week I had tons of free time)

why? oh why?!!

no group dates, I'm gonna juggle. hah

ps. sixelacat - I love zora.. but I am zoya. hee hee wink.gif
Just pick yourself some Instead. As long as you get it up there right you should be able to shag without being anybody's bloody valentine.
oh wow. I've never even seen those! can I get 'em not online??? tomorrow is probably d-day.. I need to practice with 'em too. I have a tipped uterus / cervix, so it can be a bit wonky.

damn, I need to get me some of those just to have on hand.

ETA - ok I found out who carries them. they do say on the instructions that women with a tipped uterus may have problems, so I might be S.O.L. but I might as well give it a whirl at least to see if I can get it in! yahoo!
so.... got the instead and did a trial run - all good. Got the call from Mr. HMCHH, met up, hung out for awhile, go to his big bed, we start to mess around and he asks if I'll rub his back for a little bit, which I agree to, and then he PROCEEDS TO FALL ASLEEP. No HMCHH portions for zoya. Shit, this morning I even woke up before him and did the never-failed-me-yet move of my hand to his package. Never ever had a guy wake up with my hand there who didn't want some. For the first time in my life, it didn't work. Nada. I am so f**cking frustrated!!! And now I don't know when I am gonna see him again. He was on an unexpected work trip that just stopped over here for one day. AARRRGGGHH!
That sucks, zoya.

Well, I found out what the mistake text was about. He wanted "something sharp" like a razor blade to cut his cocaine. He went on a binge and stayed up for several days. Oh, those service industry professionals. Workcrush has been drinking way too much for the last few months--ever since his break-up--and now this shit. He's a huge mess. He claims to be mostly sober since the coke ran out, says he knows he's got to straighten up and quit the partying. Just dunno.

I had a sort of tenative date tonight w/ Plan B crush, but he hasn't called to finalize plans...the band we were gonna see starts in 2 1/2 hours, so we'll miss it if he doesn't call soon.

Yeah, from my experience in the service industry, it's not likely he's actually going to quit that type of partying anytime soon. Not that shagging on coke isn't fun, but it's obviously not the healthy way to go. I hope PlanB crush called!!!!

Zoya, *blows raspberry* to that un-horny boy! How are the rest of the harem novitiates? Still lined up and at attention? (sorry about the zora/zoya thing wink.gif sixelacat=dyslexic kitty)
Eh, workcrush is on a giant backslide. He was clean and sober (had been so for 3 years) when I first met him, and he started having the occasional glass of wine with dinner or a drink after shift about 6-7 mo. ago. At the very end of his relationship and after, he started drinking with the boys and drinking a lot. He said this past weekend was his first slip-up involving anything besides alcohol. I don't feel super-optimistic about him cutting down on the partying, but since he managed to work as a waiter/bartender w/o drinking for an extended period before, it seems at least theoretically possible. But I'm not holding my breath.

Plan B called, a bit late for the show, but we went and it was pretty fun. He has to work at 6AM, so we called it night pretty early and I didn't get any action. mad.gif
well, I just found out that one of the harem is actually not going to be in town until Aug 1....I thought he was coming this week. I have not heard from HGF.

I'm a little funky because Mr. HMCHH just seemed kinda overall - not exactly weird - but that dumb guy kinda out of it thing. Maybe pulling back a little, maybe just tired. Who knows...but you know, that THING. I don't want any kind of relationship right now, but the friends with benefits thing is just fine, specially with him. But at the end of the day, the friends part is the most important thing to me, and my funk is because I wanna get to be friends with him, and I don't think he's allowing that to happen in some ways. I feel like I should say something, something as simple as exactly what I said before - "I think that friends with benefits kicks ass, but the friends part is the most important."

Maybe I'm overthinking it too much. He is only 23. anyway. so the harem is kinda lagging but that's ok I guess. I'm a busy girl with other shit. Been talking to the ex on the phone a lot lately too.

ETA: but dammit! He is Hotty McHottHott - he's a total hottie and young and virile and not fucked up on drugs or alcohol so why the f**ck isn't he getting down and dirty with me?! HA!
My workcrush issues don't even belong in this thread anymore ...we don't work together anymore, it's not a crush thing now, and I think I'm done.

He sent me nonsensical text messages all last night and this morning. He's just, yeah, on a big backslide, and considering his past, the prognosis isn't good at all.

I feel kind of sick. I'm worried about him, but I don't want to be part of his downward spiral anymore.
So, Starbucks boy and I are going for coffee sometime next weekend. And, this old accountant that I used to date is taking me to Clerks 2 on Weds this week. We were old flirts, but nothing ever happened. Besides, I need some serious flirting.

SC boy and I are okay. I got sick this past week (bad seizure/migrane, and I had to miss half a day of work on Friday). My mother sent me this really mean email saying that she thinks that seeing him is affecting my health, and that I'm missing work (when I went to work, and they saw me pratically puking at my damn cubicle). Then the email previous, she was all, "I'm so happy that you and the boy are good...." WTF? Parents are so fucked up!SC boy and I talked about how it was good to fight...but I really miss him.

i SO know that "thing" you are talking about zoya! we need to come up with a word for it. i hate it! thankfullly, in my experience, i thought it was a "thing" more then it actually was. meaning, the thing was in my head. hopefully yours is too and hes just being a moody dude.

i had a long weekend that involved lots of brain cell killing activity so, i dont think i am making much sense today.
I really miss SC boy.

However, Starbucks boy and I are going to hang out next weekend... smile.gif

And I have a semi date with an old friend on Weds. to see Clerks 2.

Question: Being SC Boy told me I could date around, should I tell him about these? Part of me thinks it would be good to have some healthy competition cross his mind, and that he better do all in his power to keep me. However, there's another part of me that is screaming no, don't even tell him.

Ugh. Any advice.....???

The Hot Boss is kickin' my ass. Seriously. I'm tired & I think I wrenched my knee yesterday afternoon. I went through some of his shit lookin' to see where he keeps the Viagra, but I'm not finding it. Medicine chest, bedside table, kitchen cabinets/drawers. Can't find his porn either.

Tcrush should be back from NYC, but I haven't called him yet. I don't really like to call just to chitchat.

Jcrush... is Jcrush. We were all out the other night & we didn't know several of the people with us. We all sat down & one girl moved to sit next to me until she did a double take between Jcrush & I & was like, "Um do you two, um I can move?" I pulled a quick baffled look & she sat. He touches me. It makes me feel funny.
AP glad the harem is going well. smile.gif

Sexy professor is back in GA. We'll see. Even if it's a night of just great sex, it should be fun. Apparantly, he's had this teacher/student fantasy since he was my professor back in school. Damn, I just wish he was younger!!!!
Grrl, I am not kidding. The man turns fifty next month & he is tearing my ass up. I've always been up for vigorous coitus, but I really don't know how long I can keep up with this pace. It always starts slowly with *LOTS* of foreplay, but winds up with popped buttons & my jeans around my ankles. I'm being worked like a ten year old Fillipino kid in a Kathy Lee Gifford sweatshop.
sassygrrl professor just turned 58..... smile.gif May have to sleep with him now. Well, at least there will insane flirting going on....

Although, just got off the phone with SC boy, and he is going to send me a care package with letter and a mix cd. I'm all giddy, b/c all I ever get in the mail anymore is bills, and your random magazines. Now, I can tell my bitchy housemate to shove it up her ass. He may be for real. Still shocks me.

Myspace boy is no longer. Whatever.

Plan B crush is as big a dog as workcrush (seeing several ladies and not very reliable) but worse than that, he only wants to mess around a lot, won't fuck. He was telling me all his lame reasons why he won't go all the way while we're stark naked in bed and his fingers are in my hoohaw. WTF.

So I met a New crush this weekend, had a good conversation and we exchanged numbers. I am petrified. He is way way way out of my league, but a genuinely nice and intelligent guy. He scribbled his cell phone number on the back of his card; he has a grown-up professional job that is enough to intimidate me all by itself. He makes an assload of $$$. Since I had his full name (which is a very unusual name), I googled him and found out: A. He's 9 years younger than me; B. He used to be a pro/sponsered skater; C. He was in a fairly well-known band. Good Maud. Could he be more successful and accomplished?

Right now, I am an unemployed waitress. An old one. Geh.

We met because my BFF and I were perching on a planter during a crowded show at a club, and the folks at a table near us invited us to come sit w/them. My BFF struck up a conversation w/ a woman at the table who turns out to be New crush's ex-wife... the divorce has been final for a week.

All my crushes are awfully iffy, damn it.
Ah, fuck Myspaceboy, Sassy. He's probably stringing people along with Tall Guy. The asshat.

Edna, nobody is out of your league. When I googled Tall Guy I nearly had a fucking fit because I thought he was some kind of badass. Turns out he was just ass bad. Hang in there, doll.

Hung out with Tcrush last night for about 45min. He's sooooo cute! Sooooo smart. Sooooo funny. I luuuuurve him!
It's true though! I'm only thirty-one! Where is his stamina coming from?

It sucks when you have it so bad you can taste it. Even strangers pick up on Jcrush & my's vibe, but *I* deny it to the hilt. He seems okay with it & everything, like it's just a matter of time before I succumb to his wiles. As a result I act like a rabid ten year old around him. I'm just waiting for the day where I sneak up & punch him in the face & then run away as fast as my legs will carry me. Maybe I'll steal his Trapperkeeper or demand that he meet me at the bikerack at three pm for a showdown...
New Myspace crush who I will now refer to as Accountant boy, who is taking me see Clerks 2 tonight. We used to be drinking buddies.... I think he wants sex, but I'm so not into that. It should be fun to flirt. Besides, we're going to go see Tom Petty in Sept. Also, has MySpace crushes first name...heh.

SC Boy made me a mix tape!! How old school is that? And, how stoked am I to me getting personal mail???

Edna, I second AP. No one is out of your league.

AP, love the trapper keeper line...heh. smile.gif

I third that. No one is out of your league!! I know that it IS challenging to get over the whole mindset of not being good enough or whatever enough and just accept that you fucking rock and start asking yourself - is he in MY league??!!!. I wrestle with that one for sure.

But girl, you rock and he is SOOO not out of your league!!

In zoya news, I decided since I am not getting any crush action, that I would contact a crush from last fall that I lost track of. (of course, he's 10 years younger than me! haha) Nothing bad happened to make us lose track, we were texting back and forth and talking on the phone for awhile, but then after a night on the town when I gave him every opportunity to kiss me and he didn't take it, our contact kind of just drifted. Plus he moved across the country. I'm gonna be in his city soon for a work trip, so I figured I'd drop him a friendly line and let him know what I've been up to - and ask what he's doing. Plus suggest that we hang out while I'm there.

I haven't heard back from him, so who knows...

Texted with Jcrush last night. It is weirdly endearing that he texts in a Sean Connery accent. I'm not kidding.

A mix tape? A MIX TAPE? OMG. He didn't get laid in high school, no ma'am. He pined. He listened to emo. Weezer. Maybe a little D&D. Comic books. Hah!

Cool Zoya! Have fun!

Coming out of lurkdom to vent about a mad, crazy crush I'm having right now.

Let's call him The Pilot. He works for a customer of ours, flys him around the country. I've been crushing on him ever since I met him. But I've never went so far as to flirt or do anything to let him know that the door is open. He's quite a bit older than me, which i LOVE. When i've talked to him in the past, its always been careful not to flirt as not to embarass myself in front of someone who might not be interested. Call it insecurity! And he has been nothing but business like to me also. Never had any inkling that he might be interested.

Well, just so happens that my boss is in Michigan visiting these customers. They all golf and get drunk and party. Guess who steals my phone number out of bosses phone and starts drunk texting me? I know he was drunk. But as they say.... truth serum. We exchanged texts for about 2 hours and then my memory got too full. I deleted the last text from him without even thinking about it! Dammit! So, here I wait for him to contact me, when I'm pretty sure that he was waiting from a response from me that time. And now is he going to think I just dont want to talk? Who knows, maybe he woke up in the morning and though~what the hell did I do~. But I'm guessing not.

Omg you guys, I am all hot and bothered just thinking about his sweet little ass. And who cares about the distance? I have a small local airport within 1 mile of my house.

What really bothers me is that i've been dating, off and on, a couple of very nice, solid, cute guys that just do nothing for me! I dont even have the urge to rip their clothes off... like I think I should have. I honestly thought that it was just some guard I had up. But apparently not because now all I can think about is this crazy long distance prospect. And I dont know when I will see him or hear from him again.

I almost want to cry!


I loathe all of my current crushes today. Maybe it's just a shitty day. Maybe I'm just becoming a stereotypical man hater. Nah. I love men, really I do. Just not today.
Yummymum, watch out for the older fellas. I swear I'm being ruined for men my own age. Going the way of the slightly silver foxes is awesome.

Ah, poor Yuefie, she's suffering from the un-crush today. Feel better doll.
My bad. It's supposely a mix cd.... I would love to make him a mix tape, b/c I'm old school like that. smile.gif Just to include the Ave Q song, "Mix Tape" on it. Still stoked though. Although, he got a little pissed that I'm taking someone else to the Tom Petty concert.... whatev.

My professor crush looks like Sean Connery in a weird way. We had many sexual texts today, which made me quite the happy girl at work dicsussing oral (I mean averages...) Heh.

Go Zoya!

And hugs yue!

Off to take a shower, and look fabulous for my date with accountant boy. Starbucks boy called me on my way home from work, and told me he's taking me out next week... smile.gif

When it rans it pours....and I'm loving it!
So what's got my skivvies all up in a bunch is this:
I had to cancel a date I thoughtlessly made for tonight (what would have been my mama's 54th b-day) and the guy seemed a little annoyed. Not outright, but I kind of got the vibe. His reply was "Oh that's fine since my friend So&So (just a friend) emailed and wanted to hang out tonight anyway. So yeah, it's cool with me. Later." Um, ok. Thanks for your understanding. Was it just too simple to say "I understand, have a nice evening with your family"? What's with the I-had-a-better-offer-anyhow thing? And the need to qualify her as being "just a friend". What's that about? Dude, we just barely went out twice before we had this date scheduled. Geez. I mean up until this point I was really startin' to crush on him but now, meh. I guess I really don't feel like going out with any more passive aggressive weenies. Or is it just me being overly sensitive? Cause well, I am feeling that way today. Am I blowing this out of proportion?

And as for the rest, well I just hate them by default. dry.gif
He was just protecting his pride, Yuefie. Ya'll had plans & you broke them very last minute (With *good*reason.) & he felt rejected. Men are dumb like that. Asshat.
(((yuefie))) fuck 'em. Even if he is annoyed, if he doesn't have the stones to say something then who cares? Have a good time tonight!

Sassy, a mix tape's a mix tape, be it on cassette, CD, memory card for your mp3 all means the same thing: he had no sex in high school! Well, maybe a little over-the-sweater action from his tomboy female best friend.....
(I do think it's kind of sweet. guess I'm a little old school too)

Have fun zoya!

yummy, you are so right. You should be picturing him naked at random moments during the day, or it's just not there! He's a pilot? Hmmm, maybe a little cockpit action is coming your way!

AP, maybe you and Jcrush will get detention together and you can shoot spitwads into his hair.....

edna, thirds on what everyone else said, and then some! Go for it!
Oooooh! Yummymum is gonna join the Mile High Club!
woo hoo! yeah Yummymum!!

well HGF just texted me to ask what I'm doing.. but I am so so so slammed with work that I had to tell him just that. I would invite him over later, but I actually have a friend coming over to help me organize my work, which really at the moment is more important 'cause I'm so behind.

And another friend of mine (of course he's 25) is coming into town at the end of the week, and he already said he'd call and we'd have a meal or something. We work together.... and he said "we'll do it off the record" ha ha Everyone knows we're friends, but what they don't know (i dunno if they suspect) is that we have had an on-again, off again physical thing for the better part of the last year.

so that's good. It's keeping me balanced in my work overload.

I'm just a little bummed that I can't get any from HGF tonite. Cause I really really really need to work. I hardly ever put off portions of any kind for work, but I really do have to tonight. yuck
my little sis is staying with me for the whole week And mister mcsqueezie has family staying with him for a whole Month too! argh. it just started to get really, really fun (ooh, he's so Dirty!) and it's practically over already.
my friend told me that an aquaintance of hers is gah-gah over Me so reverse-crushie! yeah! i have no idea who he even is but my mind is making mental pictures all the time.
i had a stupid funny thing happen to me the other day too. my friend and neighbour came over to pick something up when he knew damn well my house was a total mess (and how wierd i am about people seeing my place like that too) And my hair was a mess And he called five minutes before he dropped by but neglected to mention that his absolute FOX of a friend was with him. well, at first i was just kinda squicked but the longer i stood there not able to make eye contact with mr foxy due to severe embarassment, the angrier i got and i very shortly threw them both out. totally rudely too, later i was more embarassed about that then anything else, and now i Can Not Stop Thinking about the beautiful stranger. the beautiful Single stranger who's apparently got his shit together and is really nice. sure, he's terrified of me but hey, that could work to my advantage right? ha.
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