Aug 16 2007, 03:03 PM
Oh hell yeah on the knock on wood business. Me too.
Hey, the diaper's still around. Good idea. I can show him later. The color was all "off" too.
He witnessed the spit up because he heard me say "oh my god" over the monitor and came in to help clean it up. (And I hope it scared him, to be honest.) I had to go try to rinse my hair in the sink (and then still had to take a shower afterwards b/c I had big CLUMPS of sour milk in my hair, and god knows what else.) Well, I guess he witnessed the aftermath. But seeing it was like something out of the exorcist, poor little guy.
The thing is, I keep citing allergies as another reason to be cautious, and since physically notbob seems to take after him waaaay more than me, and since he is a big mass of allergies, sensitive skin, chronic heartburn, etc, you'd think he'd take it more seriously.
Oh, and one more thought on the medicines--some people think that anything you can get over the counter must be safe, especially anything marketed to babies. Here again I must remind people that you can (pretty easily) kill yourself with an overdose of aspirin or tylenol.
Aug 16 2007, 03:06 PM
yeah, but the thing is that men can be incredibly huge dipshits about basic childcare logic like this (sorry men, but that's a sexist statement i'll stand by), so maybe he needs you to connect the allergy dots for him. you could always draw a diagram...
Aug 16 2007, 05:11 PM
Isn't that the truth. I hate to be part of a stereotype but honestly.
I said I'd make a list of what was ok and put it up. I don't know how much clearer I can make it then I have, but a list is worth a try. I softened it a bit by saying I can't always remember what he can and can't have (which is true on some of the more unusual stuff) but I don't think that's the point.
If it happens again and notbob ends up with another upset stomach like that he's the one who's going to be trying to put him down while he fusses, cries, bounces, and whatever else he did. Oh, and possibly vomits. I don't care what time he has to get up for work.
Aug 16 2007, 06:54 PM
omg i can soooo see i have this coming! mr wanted to give lil h2o melon juice and he is a week old. he thinks i am being silly. i actually had to get angry about it.
Aug 17 2007, 10:02 AM
That's insane. I'd get angry too.
It's even easier to figure out what's ok at that age--breast milk only (or formula if not breastfeeding.)
What's with these guys?
To his credit mine seems to have finally learned the lesson. For now at least.
Aug 17 2007, 10:39 AM
in response, anoushh, and i guess in general response to all these issues we've touched on of late, i think people have a block against actually researching a lot of these parenting choices, too, because they think they're supposed to know it all by instinct or else they think, "how hard can it be?". in a way it's like that old chestnut about men never asking for directions -- they think it's an admission of weakness! not that the whole breastmilk or appropriate substitute only thing isn't obvious to a lot of people's instincts, but much of childrearing isn't. i also think there's a subset of people who assume that whatever their parents did that wasn't horrible is the way to go, which is probably why even many people who don't have strong convictions about it still circumcise (despite its not being recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics) and most people in america still think it's great to wean at, say, six months (despite the WHO's recommendation that breastfeeding for at least two years is best). or again, why people want to give an infant cold meds (and i have been guilty of this desire) when there's no indication they're needed or helpful. i guess a lot of our assumptions about childrearing are based more on comfort level than on logic (watermelon juice seems like a perfectly reasonable, harmless thing, not like giving your newborn spicy chili, right? and yet it's very hard on an infant's system)...which is something i have a hard time accepting. and still more, they're based on the idea that we have to reaffirm our own upbringings (or our parents' choices, which is why my MIL finds it so annoying that i'm not having a home birth this time) through our choices with our children -- that making a different choice is somehow a denunciation of others' choices. (which is why we sometimes feel we have to be super-careful about not questioning anyone's choices here; i wish we felt more free to do that so that we could learn the reasoning behind them!)
i just hate that.
ETA: on another topic entirely, as i was writing that i heard a tiny voice saying what sounded like "obama, obama," from the next room. turns out he was saying "poop mama, poop mama," as he crouched in front of the potty examining the poop he had made (a direct hit) and completely on his own. i'm so psyched! i can't believe he only turned 2 last week.
Aug 17 2007, 11:03 AM
poop in the potty! WHOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOO! Ok, saying 'Obama" would have been really cool too.
Yeah, i agree with gren. For us, it goes even a step farther than accepting AAP or FDA recommendations (and, I think the WHO has recommended circumcision as an AIDS prevention measure, ya?). Every group, regulatory, lobby, oversight, grassroots, has some level of agenda they're trying to make everyone else accept as the "T" truth. Its our job as parents to read, discuss, ask questions of our pediatrician, our parents, other young parents, and make a decision that is best for our family. When we decided not to breastfeed, I talked about it in deapth with our pediatrician. His thoughts are that BF is clearly best, so long as the mother, and child are not resentful of it. I really was quite resentful at that point...so, we made the descision as a family.
Another example i have is a girlfriend who is just finishing weaning her 18 month old. Who has never slept a night in her own crib. To me, this seems ghastly...but, the parents and the baby are very happy, well adjusted people. Clearly, this has worked great for their family! So, kudos to them!
Aug 17 2007, 11:15 AM
yeah, but saying "obama" TO the poop would have been pretty weird...even in our family!
the WHO recommends circumcision as an AIDS prevention measure if you're a sub-saharan african who does a lot of migrant labor and uses prostitutes...otherwise, there's a fierce debate going as to whether it actually helps, etc.
i like to quote the WHO breastfeeding rec to illustrate to people who don't know that breastfeeding has huge health benefits for years and that it's not that at six months (when they typically start solids), a baby "doesn't really need it" anymore. and as you know, we weaned at 21 months, which was right for us (and the bean was fine with it and shows no desire to go back).
and i totally see what you mean, mox, about your feelings on BF. obviously if it's going to cast a shadow on your whole relationship with your child, then that's something to seriously reconsider! but i hate how a lot of magazines try to tread the "safe" line by casting as a "lifestyle choice." it's also a serious health decision. i mean, it would be easier for me as a "lifestyle choice" to feed my kid nonorganic fast food crap all the time (and don't think i'm not tempted), but it's not just about "what's right for me," it's about "what's right for my kid," who is the one in this equation who gets all his choices made for him.
(except, apparently, when to poop in the potty. that has become his choice
i have mixed thoughts on cosleeping. in many ways i think it's probably good, but i also tend to think that it's harder to adjust OUT of it the longer it goes on. the bean didn't seem to care and i was up holding and nursing him every two hours for a while anyhow, but the payoff (as opposed to just rolling over and nursing him, as my MIL extols) is that i'm not NOW dealing with readjustment/abandonment feelings. still, some people, and in some countries, they cosleep forever and i don't see anything wrong with that.
ETA: and while i was writing THAT he took all his bath toys (lion, monkey, plastic easter eggs, rings, etc.) and put them in the toilet. it's a laugh a minute around here...
Aug 17 2007, 11:31 AM
I agree, I have been getting super frustrated with all the personal advice/books/Internet articles all of which tell me completely opposite points of view. Pregnancy was bad enough, but now that I have my 6-week-old, I am getting mighty interested in sleep issues (imagine that). I KNOW it's too early to really be focused on getting him to sleep through the night, but is it too much to ask that he wake up only once between 2 and 4, or even to have a more regular routine? He has acid reflux and some nights is up ALL night grunting. Ugh. I'm going crazy.
I read about schedules, and demand feeding, and Ferber, and attachment parenting, and Babywise, and E.A.S.Y. from the Baby Whisperer, and I have a sister and 2 friends with 1-year-olds, and I'm just going insane from information overload. But I keep thinking I will hit upon The Answer and he will morph into a robot baby who I can schedule into a Palm Pilot and who sleeps calmly from 11-7. (There is no need to tell me this is unlikely, but I can't be alone in dreaming.)
Aug 17 2007, 11:46 AM
That article about circumcision being beneficial for preventing transmission of HIV in africa came out the week my dad was having a fit about us deciding not to circumcise notbob. Rather, it was a given for us not to, esp with the mister's European origins, but it was the week it came up with my dad asking.
And that's right gren about the scope of the recommendations--still very limited.
Which ties in very neatly with your point about our parents wanting our choices to validate their previous choices. Boy is that right.
In your case it's a more unusual case of the MIL being pissy about NOT wanting a homebirth--usually its the other way around these days, but the point is the same.
Of course there are great indications for home birth--but one of them is increased comfort and relaxed amostphere for the mother. If you aren't relaxed and comfortable with it, there goes that benefit.
And as you say, it's not really about the facts in these cases, is it?
I still keep thinking about "primary maternal preoccupation"--esp when I start to feel almost guilty for telling other people how to take care of him.
Primary maternal preoccupation was a phrase used by British psych D. W. Winnicott to describe the " state of high and exclusive sensitiveness towards the infant"
Also this is so interesting: "The good-enough mother...starts off with an almost complete adaptation to her infant's needs, and as time proceeds she adapts less and less completely, gradually, according to the infant's growing ability to deal with her failure..."
(In Winnicott's theory the "good enough mother" is what is desirable.)
Oh aquagirl, boy does that sound like me. None of the books seem to acknowledge the function of age and maturity. For all the stressing, struggling, etc, I did about those very things, he got onto a more regular schedule when he was ready--about 5 months or so.
Is he taking anything for the reflux? Notbob was diagnosed at 6 weeks and within 24 hours of taking zantac he was like a new kid. (Still slept for shit, but at least it was then 3 hours at a stretch sometimes instead of 1 or 1 1/2--and he wasn't crabby during the day like he'd been.) It was like a flippin' miracle.
If I was to have another kid that's one thing that I'd worry soooo much less about. I'd say at this age you just meet his needs and try to keep from going crazy. I am still in shock at the US system that gives you six weeks of maternity leave if you are lucky. Some can manage it, I know, but I sure couldn't have. I was in a lot of pain still, exhausted, and just about going crazy at that point.
Btw, I know that 5 months seems like a million years away at this point--it did to me then. Sorry.
Aug 17 2007, 12:29 PM
yeah, in my case i needed medical attention my homebirth midwives couldn't (because they failed to, not because they theoretically couldn't -- you should have seen my arms after their failed IV insertion attempts) give, and this time i just don't feel like spending the out-of-pocket money for an experience that isn't important to me. i'd rather spend it on something that IS important to me, like going to france for a week! not all mothers have increased comfort and relaxation at home; some of us would rather leave the mess in hospital and then go home! but then, i also like hotels (almost better than home)...
i remember your dad's freakout, anoushh...i maintain that the best response in such cases is "we don't plan to circumcise our male or female children." and has anyone figured out that having all your mucus membranes cauterized would ALSO be beneficial for preventing HIV transmission (though by no means foolproof; condoms are statistically much better), but that's not an argument for doing so? i mean, yeah, if you ARE a sub-saharan african and you JUST CAN'T stay faithful to your wife and you spend months away from home working in migrant labour camps with resident hookers and that is the CULTURE (sadly), fine, have your foreskin removed and play the odds.
i like the concept of "primary maternal preoccupation" and of the "good-enough" mother. that certainly describes my mother, and we are very fond of her now, even though she admittedly kind of spaced out our toddler years due to exhaustion.
ETA: and aquagirl, six weeks is a rough time for almost everyone. and i maintain that discussing the minute details too much with close friends and relatives is generally something to be avoided, especially if there is a shred of rivalry anywhere. ugh. talk about "needing to have your choices validated!" it's the flippin' lacanian mirror!
Aug 17 2007, 01:16 PM
aqua, I remember 6 weeks! Not fondly. Annoush is right about the zantac...seems to work miracles for the acidy babies. Hell, it works miracles for the acidy moxieman! At any rate, at 6 or 7 or 8 weeks (thereabouts...its fuzzy), I bought my baby bible, Dr. Brazelton's "Touchpoints." AND got a stellar piece of advice from my hairdresser of all people (she has 2 little ones). So, herein lies the basic points:
1. Brazelton- you know your child. he will tell you what he needs, you only have to listen. This then lets you find the "workable" theory to try...for some, Ferber, for others, Sears...although Babywise is kinda dangerous at the newborn age.
2. Brazelton - a 6 week old baby is incapable of self-soothing, on a philological level. To expect it is to set yourself up for frustration.
3. Brazelton - the above being said, a bedtime routine started at 6-8 weeks old will give him a rock to cling to when he IS ready to learn self soothing, around 4-6 months old.
4. Hair Dresser (who breast fed both her kids, and pumped too): The "Dream feed." You feed littleaqua just before putting him to bed, say 9pm. Then, you go to bed yourself an hour or two later, perhaps pumping just before bed. Your husband then feeds littleaqua IN HIS SLEEP before HE comes to bed, say midnight. Then, baby will be tided over another couple hours and you can feed him again at whenever he wakes up.
-Since we formula fed, this worked GREAT for us in terms of letting each of us get 4-5 hour blocks of sleep.
Aug 17 2007, 02:18 PM
heh, mox...and the fact that you REMEMBER six weeks means that whole dreamfeed thing was probably good advice!
Aug 17 2007, 06:18 PM
have any of you had to pump an dump for any reason? i get horrible migrains and had to take an imitrex. i waited till i pumped enough for two bottles so i would not have to supplement. but i am frusterated with the fact that i have to throw out my milk for 8 hrs. maybe i am just being hormonal and cranky.
Aug 17 2007, 07:15 PM
I should have known Bust was the place to come! I just got so much good stuff from just the few posts after mine! First of all, I am excited about Zantac, more than willing to medicate my baby, and am going to ask his pediatrician about it right away. Second, I LOVE the "dream feed" thing. I am SO going to do that. I already called my husband and he was all "ooohhh...something where I
have to do something...I'm not so sure about that." I am 65% sure he was joking. But we will try it, that's for sure. You just stick the bottle in his mouth while he's sleeping? I am breastfeeding (which is why the nights are so extra hellish), so I will do the pumping thing. I have been pumping, but for some reason haven't had husband do any nighttime feedings yet. I guess it's because I was worried about getting engorged. But 4-5 hours would be fine.
As for the 6 weeks of maternity leave, I just can't be more grateful I am taking a year off work. (I'm a teacher, and we're going to move this year, so I basically quit.) Thank god for small favours. I just can't even get through my head how many people have to go back to work at the stage I am at right now. I feel sorry enough for myself as it is.
And, he's not even a bad baby (acid reflux aside). He ADORES his swing, and will sleep for 3-3.5 hours in it during the day..I felt guilty at first and did a flurry of research so I could justify it to myself and I finally felt justified when my doctor cousin pointed out that her first daughter loved it, and then her next 2 hated it, and nothing would soothe them like the swing had, and I should just be grateful that I have something that works so well. So I am grateful. Not guilty! Not an abandoning, uncaring, un babywearing mother! Not!
Also, he doesn't really cry for no reason. So far, every time he has cried it has been for some discernible reason. Other than going to sleep sometimes, when we let him cry for 5-10 minutes and he falls asleep. Is that too long to let a 6 week old "cry it out"?
Sorry to ramble on...I'm sure you all appreciate the feeling of being all obsessed about everything and being all too aware that most people out there don't want to hear it. At least here people can skim or skip!
Thanks again for the super duper tips!
Aug 18 2007, 12:42 AM
I AM REALLY PISSED OFF COZ I JUST TYPED A LONG REPLY AND ACCIDENTALLY PRESSED BACKPAGE SO THIS WILL BE A QUICKer AND RUDE-LOOKING POST
aquagirl: if your bub is only crying himself to sleep and you can wait i'd let it go! wish i could do the same - my little miss (2 months old today) will only work herself up to a crying fit, and then there'd be no consoling. i don't believe that babies cry for no reason. who was it that said babies are not capable of manipulation? i agree with that.
two things i was previously talking about before they got wiped off:
one: parenting choices. i feel guilty too when i talk to other people about how i take care of my little one, coz i know i look like i spoil her too much according to the 'norm'. we feed not according to three-hr blocks, we co-sleep, (we have a dummy on standby now but have not had the need to use it yet) i carry her around during the day, we don't follow a routine - and don't intend to work towards one yet, since i don't have one myself. i feel the harshest 'critics' are the grandparents though, the fact that what they did worked out fine, that it was an evolutionary success, seems to have given them a right to comment on what i want/feels is best for my child. we live with them - either mine or his, so we get a lot more dosage than most people would. i feel really challenged to have to hold up 24/7 and be seen as a 'good mum' - in control and know instinctively what to do - just so they won't get on my tail. and you can't talk back too much because they're 'only trying to help'! things are looking up though, we're going to get our own space soon.
two: err... i forgot. oh yes, dads - i didn't expect to be so involved with the baby, or rather, i didn't expect how much the father cannot help with the baby, esp coz i breastfeed, and i'm lazy with expressing (which i find is more work than breastfeeding so why bother). no matter how much he's trying to be actively involved with the bub, there are so many more things he doesn't notice/think are important/keep on track/'instinctively' feel, so everything is basically down to me the mother. it doesn't really suck once i've realised and accepted it, because that is how nature design is, but it just makes me feel like this whole modern family image is a scam! anyway i do feel special once i decide to think that i'm the Chosen One to look after my bub.
anoushh i think it was you asking where i'm from: we're downunder, with the kangaroos and all that.
Aug 18 2007, 01:01 PM
shiny, instead of looking at is "i have to throw my milk away," try looking at it as "i can take the med i need and still maintain my milk supply." i had a girlfriend who used to pump and dump to go to happy hour (not often, but she did it a few times) and thought it was totally worth it.
aqua, we had good success with the dreamfeed both in a bottle and from the breast. when they're really little they nearly always just start sucking away when you pop it in. you could even do two if you go to bed after the babe: one when you go, one for your husband to do later. even two hours later will buy you more sleep time.
karcher, i'm sorry the atmospheric pressures are bugging you so much. i think it's important to learn not to take those things to heart because they will ALWAYS be there. i try to take the attitude that such people (e.g. in-laws who are desperately trying to force THEIR parenting choices on you) are more to be pitied than censured; it's their loss that they can't conceive of anything working better for you than what they did.
Aug 18 2007, 09:16 PM
Up at FIVE O'CLOCK in the effing morning.
This wouldn't be so bad if he went to sleep before 9 pm. Oh, and woke up every twenty minutes for the first couple of hours.
I'm tired. Thank god the mister is home from work the next couple of days. Then my mom leaves in just about a week and a half for a whole month. I'm not looking forward to this.
That's all I can manage right now--see reason above.
Aug 19 2007, 05:49 AM
I'm back and delurking because I really need some help!! The lil guy was sleeping well for quite a while there but the past 2- 2 1/2 weeks have been hell! I thought it was due to a cold at first cuz he was all runny and stuffy but the nose has cleared up and the sleep is no better, it may actually be worse. He goes down great but wakes up about 3 hours after going down and is inconsolable unless I pick him up and hold him. Then the fingeres go in the mouth and he's out again. When I put him down he wakes up screaming again, sometimes right away and soemtimes after an hour or 2.. He seems really uncomfortable so I've tried MOtrin for him but it doesn't seem to make any difference. I've had to bring him to bed with me the past few nights just so I could get some sleep. I'm not against cosleeping but it just doesn't work for me (I'm waaayy too lite of a sleeper adn the MR is way too heavy of a sleeper). I was trying to not nurse in the night but I've gone back to nursing thinking that maybe he's hungry or needs the cuddles but it hasn't made a bit of differnece. The Mr. is very unhelpful. He sleeps thru everything at night and never gets up to take a shift. His solution to everything?- "Why don't you just put in some earplugs and let him cry it out?" Yeah cuz I'll sleep great knowing my kid is screaming his head off for hours while I lay there with earplugs in, jackass.
BTW lil guy started crawling last week and is almost 8 months.
Any ideas, help? Anyone else go thru this at this age? Please tell me it'll get better soon!!!
Aug 19 2007, 10:24 AM
Jas, can I slap your husband?
And then you want to have a go at mine? He actually turned his back on notbob when he KNEW he was standing up holding on to the lazy boy type chair (I hate that thing and if it was my house it would be gone.) So guess what happened. Yep. He fell. Right on the back of his head.
So I talked to triage nurse on call and got some advice on what to look for re: problem signs, and I know he's probably fine, but I'm really angry.
I know that's not very helpful, Jasmine, but given the above situation I'm too angry at the moment to be able to say more than that.
Except to note that the just crawling stage is normally tough in the way you describe. Think of it--it's a whole new world to the baby. It's like if you could suddenly fly, I'd think.
Aug 19 2007, 10:30 AM
Jas- it is as annoush says...a whole world of independence has opened, which is scary and fun at the same time. 8-9 mos is rough, as is 12 mos. Plus, it does sound like effing teeth are coming. Cause, it wouldn't be right for one sleep problem NOT to be compounded by something else, eh?
Aug 19 2007, 11:17 AM
oh no, you guys mean there are MORE rough patches coming up??? AAAHHHHHHHhhhh....
3am and the bub is sleeping sweetly right now but i just can't catch up on my beauty sleep somehow
if i remember correctly i think it is oxytocin which we all might have heard several times that is the stuff produced at large amounts at birth that makes us sympathetic and particularly caring to our baby, the misters do not have the stuff so that's why they seem to have a more detached 'let the baby learn it'll be alright' attitude. girls normally produce oxytocin too so that's why females in general are more caring creatures. maybe they should start giving out oxytocin pills to new dads, or just guys, put 'em in beer like flouride in water or something.
incidentally i've been curious about why this thread is here in the talk about sex forum - that seems to be one of the last things i'm thinking about and it does not look like i'm interested in getting any anytime soon... how long did it take you ladies to uh, get your groove back?
Aug 19 2007, 12:12 PM
Karcher, my baby is 6 weeks, and we have had sex once or twice..uh, me and my husband that is... but it was not very enjoyable. We made out like crazy a couple of nights, like we hadn't in a long time, which was great, but then, you know, they always want to get to the SEX. Bleah.
I had my 6-week checkup and got on the pill that is safe for breastfeeding, and the doctor said I will be covered in a week. So when I get home Tuesday (visiting my mom in Utah), I will be set to go and let him do his business to completion, if you get my drift. Hopefully it will get better and better.
I was so excited to not be pregnant anymore, for sex and for sleeping on my stomach, but now it's my breasts that hinder me! Ugh. They're like an F.
On vacation here away from home, baby is doing a 2, 4, 6, 8 feeding thing if we go to sleep at 12. (I try to go to bed super late, because otherwise it's just one more time I have to wake up!) And, he doesn't really go back to sleep after the 4 am one because of the acid reflux. I'm going to call his doctor about the medicine, but I don't know if I'll be able to get it before his appointment next week. Ugh again.
Also, his naps are MUCH shorter because Grandma doesn't have a Swing (picture sound of the angels with the word Swiiiing). I have never missed an inanimate object so fervently.
I went back on Weight Watchers this week. I feel so fat and ugly. And yesterday my mom was completely nasty about my hair!! She told me it looks like I put forth effort to make it look terrible, and if SHE was on a weight-reduction plan she would at least take care of something easy like her hair, and who's cutting it, anyway. I cried and we got in a big fight and she apologized but I'm still kind of depressed. She is always complaining about being ugly and old, and I constantly tell her nothing but how beautiful and great she looks! Why would she not understand that I have never felt worse about myself physically than I do right now? Who tries to make their hair look bad?
Aug 19 2007, 01:25 PM
karcher, this thread is in the sex forum because it was originally started by someone who got pregnant unexpectantly and so...thought of it more of an offshoot of sex than otherwise. and it just never moved.
aqua! your mom is totally projecting her insecurities onto you. i'm sorry she's not able to be as good a friend to you as you are to her with the reassurances, but recognise that her disparaging remarks about your appearance are all about how she feels about herself and that's just sad for her. not for you. and try to give yourself a break about weight watchers; the weight will come off (breastfeeding helps tons!) and you will be happier and healthier if you aren't too stressed about/focused on your weight. this is a great time to spend making nourishing choices (i.e. not overloading on junk that ends up making you feel bad) and learning to eat healthier for when your baby wants everything on your plate (which is a period that started a year ago for us and is still going strong).
jas, i'm so sorry about your husband. personally, i've spent a fair amount of time threatening to divorce mine if he doesn't step up and do his share, and i think it's worth it to think about how much you need him to give and how much you want to assert yourself in order to be happy in the long-term. personally, i'm happy i've done my share of (it must be said) bitching and bullying because he really was unaware of the extent of the work/exhaustion and i am a person who needs to feel i have an equal partner or i will feel both ill-used and disrespectful of him. the ratio might change if i were working less, but even so you have a right to a reasonable amount of support and work-sharing. as someone once said, taking care of a baby is a full-time job, so when you husband is home it should be fifty-fifty. my mom always told me about how my dad (whom she no longer even speaks to!) was an awesome dad and came home from his ten-hour days running his own tech company to totally take over bedtime and bathtime and playing with us when we were little. i have another friend (guy) who got up with his wife EVERY TIME she did to nurse -- he just sat there with her, brought her water, whatever. and he was working full-time (although it must be said that he's a bit of an insomniac). and i've held these examples up to the mister more than once. feel free to borrow them...
anoushh, sorry about MNS (male negligence syndrome). that, i think, is a different issue, the issue of cluelessness. i hope he's educable.
Aug 19 2007, 06:22 PM
Yeah, I almost suffocated my hubby with my pillow last pm as I got up yet again with a screaming baby. I just don't get how they do it. Anyways... I'm still at a loss as far as what to do for lil guy. Tonight he seemed exceptionally tired and fell asleep at 6:20pm (usually 7pm is his bedtime). I've read that excessive nightwakings could be due to being overtired so I'm keeping my fingers crossed for a quiet night (but I'm not holding my breath). I guess I'll just keep going to him and take him into bed with me if need be. I just don't want to set myself up for a hard time getting him back into his own crib again. Arrgghh!!! Motherhood is extremely frustrating!
Aug 19 2007, 08:13 PM
good luck jasmine!
well, i think i am having a little postpartum blues. i have been crazy weepy and i don't really have a reason why, just weepy. i do think it relates to how much sleep i have been getting. (not friggin' much) up most of the night last night and lil has slept most of the day so i am probably in for it tonight too. mr has a potential candidate for a position he is chairing the hiring committee for so he has to romance her while she is here interviewing so he can not be up all night with lil. mr. is napping now though so i think he will take the first feed after 10 (i pumped) so i can get a little sleep. i did get out a little today and that helps too. it has been crazy smokey here so i have pretty much been stuck indoors but we all went to the mall and just walked around. it was nice.
i wish i had something good to add to the advice but shinyboy is 10 and it seems so long age since he was a baby that i don't really remember and all my experience with babies since then is with very sick babies so it just doesn't relate.
Aug 20 2007, 05:49 AM
Ok, so last night was better. Not perfect, but better. Lil guy went down at 6:20pm, woke up at 9:15pm and finally fell back asleep at around 10pm without me needing to pick him up or let him CIO, I just gave him some Tylenol, rubbed his back and shushed him 'til he fell asleep. He wasn't thrilled about the whole no pick up thing but it worked. Then he woke up at 12:30am but fell back to sleep after just a few minutes of shushing and back rubs. Up again at 5:45am when I nursed him then he played in his crib for 20-30 minutes and fell asleep, which is where he currently is. He must be as exhausted as I feel from these past couple weeks cuz he's usually up by 7am! I guess we'll just keep seeing how things go as far as asleep is concerned. I just get so irritated when I realize that I haven't had a good, uninterrupted night's sleep in months yet the Mr. is the one who complains that he's sooo tired. Arrgghhh! I'm feeling some serious spousal resentment brewing.
Aug 23 2007, 04:30 AM
jas- are things still going OK? The good sleep-bad sleep seems to come in groups.
We've had a delightful couple of days, despite being down with the pink eye/ear infection combo platter. Those eyedrops are miracles, i swear!
Anyway, her words are just expounding now! She still very much favors the point-and-grunt, but like with walking and crawling before, moxette will eventually realize words are easier than gestures. We now have (in addition to mama, dada, nana, papa, etc.): Cheese, Water, Up, Mac (we love mac and cheese here), Arthur O, Kitty, Koko (our neighbor's cockatu), and POTTY. She's freaking fascinated with the toilet. I think its b/c it has water in it. Still, this is something I'm gonna encourage. Who knows, maybe I'll have the 2 yr old who potty trains? Probably not. Anyway, we've also got summersaults, jumping, running and stair climbing. Honestly, we've just had FUN the last couple days. And, we're all back to school/work, which is nice, too.
How's everyone else?
Aug 23 2007, 09:54 AM
aren't words exciting, mox? it's amazing, too, how fast they start coming.
as for potty training, we're in the throes of it right now, and the bean is 2 weeks past two. we've been at the beach for a week and we let him run around naked while we're in the house, and he's been using the potty every time. typically he'll go, "pee (or poop) in the potty," then run and do it, then resume his activity. he also enjoys dumping it in the toilet. he basically trained himself. the only thing is that i think it will be much harder when he's in an environment where the potty is less accessible and/or he has too many clothes on (like at the coop playschool we're going to be attending 3 mornings a week, where the potties are shut in the bathroom and he might be very far away. anyone have any ideas? i'd love for him to be reliably potty trained by the time the baby comes (ok, maybe too ambitious as i'm something like 36 weeks now, but still).
i'm also pretty proud of having made potty training an elective and rewarding experience for him (i think two-year-old power struggled/scolding or parental frustration are some of the major reasons kids balk at potty training).
anoushh, jas, shiny, hope things are going ok (especially with the absence of your mom, anoushh!).
Aug 23 2007, 11:30 AM
hey, remember the baby Einstein debate? of course you do! Anyway, Rebel Dad (one of my favorite bloggers) had a good post on the believablity of singular or even multiple study data as "line in sand" for child rearing. This is it.
Just keep doing what you're doing, i think, for the potty training. I'm convinced through watching many younger cousins and nieces do this, that its something parents can praise and set up shop for, but kids choose when to do it themselves. Moxette loves playing with the flusher handle right now, and is fascinated that mommy goes pee on the potty. Totally awesome for now.
Aug 23 2007, 05:14 PM
unfortunately, i can't just keep doing what i'm doing, as the kids can't run around naked at coop! i'm hoping some of the experienced moms/babysitters might have a clue on how to make the naked-to-clothes pottying transition....
definitely true that study data is not always a reliable point of departure for parenting decisions. i think, though, that anoushh was more trying to point out how ironic it is that the videos are called "baby einstein" if they may actually make you dumber! personally, my parenting decision about baby einstein was made by the fact that i found it annoying/cloying/condescending and the bean was bored...the study data is just an amusing extra. i plan to discourage the bean's watching disney movies (except, perhaps, a select few older ones, like "alice in wonderland") for the same reasons (at least on my part -- i find them annoying and i hate their politics/aesthetic) -- although i do think they're better than the "new" spastic/ADD sesame street.
speaking of "rebel dads," has anyone read neal pollack's book about fatherhood ("alternadad")? i was disappointed, to say the least. basically he paints himself as so unconventional, and yet really isn't. at all. maybe i was naive to hope otherwise...
Aug 24 2007, 05:16 AM
I think, especially as academics, our goal should be to read the studies, and make informed judgement calls based on what is best for our individual families. We don't mind the baby einstein in particular, and I enjoyed the disney movies as a girl (and the pixar ones as an adult), yet, I really don't think that more than 1/2 hour on any given day is a good thing for my kid. She gets jumpy and demanding if she is allowed to space out any more than that. I don't know about making kids dumber, either. I would question the impact of TV as anything other than entertainment...if someone is using it as an educational tool, then perhaps some more thoughtful exercise should be done, ya?
Anyway, I had both kidlets for a couple hours yesterday (mine and BFF's 18 month old). Far from what I had expected, they played GREAT, so long as I had enough of everything for both of them! The last month or so, they've both been very possessive when they're together. I'm really glad that didn't happen yesterday, and that we all had a great time. At one point, I found them cuddling with the BFF's poor kitty. It was god-damed adorable.
Aug 24 2007, 09:00 AM
hey mommas! just checking in - i've been lurking for the past several weeks since jackaroo was born, but haven't had a chance to post here yet. honestly, it's funny, most of my questions are magically answered in here before i even have to post them, since we have a few other tiny ones in the thread.
in a nutshell: he was born 7/8/07. we wound up having to go c-section after i pushed for several hours. i have a spinal fusion in my lumbar area and i just wasn't able to push him out, as hard as i tried. he was sideways, his big ole' head caught on my pelvic bone. my epidural didn't work because of the scar tissue in my back and i was having back labor. we could see his head for a couple of hours, but i couldn't get it to come down any more. my back is still not the same as it was before the delivery. i used muscles that i haven't used since before my surgeries four years ago. it's funny, at the beginning of my pregnancy, i thought for sure i'd need a c-section because of my condition, but it was my midwife and doc that encouraged me to try vaginal. i am glad they gave me the opportunity to try, and quite honestly was heartbroken when i realized that i truly wasn't going to be able to do it. until i saw him, of course. i'd do it all again if i had to.
the wee one is 6 weeks now. he had his ped. appt on tuesday and is gaining and growing very well, which is good compared to his 3week appointment that landed us in the children's hospital for a night! at the 3week, his doctor thought he was too noisy with his breathing and since he hadn't gained back up to birth weight at that time, she sent us to the er and demanded that we be admitted.
i'm sure i don't have to tell you how scary that shit was!
he'd been "noisy" since birth and when i'd asked the neonatalogist about it, he said it was common and nothing to worry over. so i didn't. and in fact, we sort of thought the noises were cute (and they prevented us from having to worry if he was alive in the middle of the night!!). anyway, he has now been diagnosed with laryngomalacia - basically a floppy larynx. the cartlidge on his voice box isn't fully developed and it causes stridor (loud breathing). anyway, docs say he will grow out of it by the time he is 18months and that it isn't life-threatening as long as he's getting all the air he needs. we've had several tests done and he always passes with flying colors and we have one final test next tuesday: a barium swallow. they'll make him drink barium while they xray him so they can watch him breathe and eat at the same time, to make sure there isn't a blockage or collapse further down his throat. i am ready to have all the tests over with and will be glad to know that all is well with him. i am sure he will be just fine. just don't ask me about my pocketbook! co-pays are killing me since we're dealing with specialists, ers, etc.
but, he is such a sweet happy boy most of the time. he nurses well and his cute little smile makes it that much easier for me to get up in the middle of the night for the fourth time. honestly though, he is getting better. in fact, he slept from midnight to 5am this morning, at which time i tried the "dream-feed"... he wasn't quite awake at 5am, but i was lying there waiting for him to wake up. i guess my body isn't used to sleeping for such long stretches at a time anymore, hehe. so when he stirred a bit, i scooped him up and stuck the boob in his mouth, which bought me another hour of sleep this morning. i guess i can't complain too much...today at least.
i had other stuff that i was going to respond to but i guess i'd better use this time (he is napping in his swing - oh yes, the glorious SWING!) to eat a bite or do something constructive like lie on the couch!
Aug 24 2007, 09:09 AM
QUOTE(grenadine @ Aug 23 2007, 06:31 PM)
speaking of "rebel dads," has anyone read neal pollack's book about fatherhood ("alternadad")? i was disappointed, to say the least. basically he paints himself as so unconventional, and yet really isn't. at all. maybe i was naive to hope otherwise...
not to mention he TOTALLY ripped off Marritt Ingman's, Inconsolable
. I've known her since Hipmama died (mostly over at Rebel Mamas Coop) and she was BENT.
He's a tool.
I'm ok with tv time, as long as it's tempered with playtime.
Aug 24 2007, 09:23 AM
great point, mox, that tv is first and foremost entertainment. the issue with baby einstein touches on exactly that -- it's marketed as something that will educate and develop a young child's brain/skills, and yet it may do just the opposite. i have to say i'd take good old honest tv smut that doesn't pretend to be anything else (like "knight rider"
over pseudo-educational telly anytime.
on the subject of tv, i watched tv as a child, but we didn't have cable or lots of videos, and i do think parents overuse those tools in the name of their own sanity. i do find a lot of disney saccharin, and i'm not much for any animation that's happened since for a variety of reasons. i also find contemporary tv (what i've seen of it, which isn't a lot) awful -- it seems to all be hyper-spastic camera angles and hyper-violent premises (a la CSI, Cold Case, etc.) or else "reality" involving incredibly stupid, unattractive people acting incredibly fatuous and terrifyingly crass. if an adult wants to indulge (if he finds it pleasurable!) in that sort of thing minimally, fine, it's like a bag of doritos. but we know what happens on a steady diet of doritos...and i don't believe my kid needs that kind of junk at all. it terrifies me to imagine what happens to the brains of young children and teens when they get britney and kevin or jessica and nick acting like asses on one channel and an explicit and gory reconstruction of a rape victim's wounds on the next channel. i've had a couple of students write about their perspectives on the media they grew up with and how it has desensitized them to cruelty and violence, and it's pretty terrifying. the "values" and "attitudes" tv models are very different from the ones in the shows i grew up watching (which all tended to be hero-based shows where people did good, there was no explicit violence, and the main issue was that the hero was not always supported by society -- a cultural attitude i think is pretty valid!). i imagine that the violence and gore in today's tv inspires a lot of insecurity in children and adolescents that we, as adults, aren't sensitive enough to.
so i tend to think it'd be easier just to not have a tv at all, actually, and i'd do it if the mister would agree...
welcome, falljackets! so glad you and jackaroo made it in. i'm glad you both made it through the birth experience intact. and while i know it's nerve-wracking doing all those tests, cheer up -- you're almost done with the tests, and the last one will hopefully just confirm that it's something harmless he'll grow out of, and besides, you get to know exactly how things look in there when he's drinking, which will be reassuring. i had a friend whose son had the same condition (stridor) and he is just fine now at almost 2. (by the way, the bean is sitting on my lap pointing at him going, "that's a baby! that's a baby gnome!" --see previous conversations of his current gnome obsession.)
Aug 24 2007, 11:00 AM
Honesly, where in the world did the bean get a "gnome" fascination? I find that the most damned endearing thing!
Just got back from the baby doc myself. Not pregnant...going to get the refill on anti-baby meds, in fact. But, I did bring up the really long induction, repeat c-section, etc. and had all my issues answered honestly and to my satisfaction. So, here's to another non-pregnant year!
Moxette has taken to tackling as many of her stuffed animals at once as possible. Its beyond cute. I see serious tea parties in my future.
Aug 24 2007, 11:35 AM
heh heh...the gnome fascination is being fueled by my book scout friend who brought by the "gnomes" book complete with life cycles of the gnome, graphic illustrations of gnome babies breastfeeding, gnome home construction, etc. etc...
but really, i have no idea.
tackling, huh? pigpile on the bed!
Aug 24 2007, 07:14 PM
hey all. i'm tired but i am here. wee princess is 8 weeks and doing fine. totally opposite to little, man was he ever a screamer. this one sleeps and smiles and is lovely. i was all set with that dunstan baby language stuff but she just doesn't ever cry. good thing i didn't pay the $60 for the dvd.
grenadine, i must know the name of the book with the breastfeeding gnomes! that's worth looking up, ha!
i was going to do elimination communication but dang, do breast-fed babies ever Not have poopy pants? pants free? hardly likely until things "firm" up a little. geesh.
little wasn't pottying until he was three and a half. i'm hoping for better this time and i may just get it. girls are supposedly easier with that stuff. i wish there was a cloth service here, i'm not up to the laundry myself. not yet anyhow, maybe once i get unpacked though that seems to be taking forever.
Aug 25 2007, 04:28 AM
Yeah, the best laid plans, eh? With just about all the babies and new (and new again) mommies, i think the most appropriate motto is "the best laid plans..." For us, it was all about managing sleep. Whatever. We did "manage", in the sense of survival. And, we have a remarkably wonderfully good tempered little one. Who simply refused until 6 weeks old at least, to acknowledge that day is day and night is night.
Anyway, pepper...glad to see you back! How's little adjusting to her royal highness? Coming out to visit your mom anytime soon? We're going to some petting zoo about 20 min north of the Detroit Zoo this weekend (BFF;s idea). Should be fun, if it stops raining!
Aug 25 2007, 06:06 AM
hey mg, we haven't been to my mom's in ages and ages. since the weather has been so fine here she's out at the cottage all the time and has even managed to entice her hubby to join us on a couple of occasions. they're on the east coast right now (took their new obscenely ginormous motorhome) for a few more days. maybe i can convince her to take us to the zoo when she gets back. i don't know how i can cross the border without teeny's birth certificate though? man, that crap takes forever to get!
the thing about the little princess is that she won't burp at night so by the time early morning rolls around she's all wiggly and grunty with gas (the farting is SO cute! how often do you get to say that eh?). if i don't hit the hay early i can kiss the last couple of hours of sleep goodbye 'cause who can sleep through that? i can't complain though, she goes to sleep easy and on her own, hope that keeps up forever!
little is a wicked awesome big brother, he just loves her, he can't get over how cute she is and he likes to help out. maybe it's a gross little boy thing but he really gets a kick out of it when she poops. he thinks it's *ewww*tastic.
i have a lady coming over this morn to take a look at a big, awkward three wheeled stroller i have for sale. seriously, this thing cost $500 new and for what? chronic back pain? non-pivotting front wheel my ass *grumble grumble*.
Aug 25 2007, 07:56 AM
hey, pepper! so glad that little is taking to the big brother waters. i'm wondering how the bean will take it. he has been excited about the baby (last weekend he bought a tiny newborn suit at the thrift store and ran around waving it on its hanger, then tried to "put it on the baby" by pushing up my shirt), but you never know how the reality will happen.
the book is just called "gnomes." it's a large-format illustrated book by the same guy who did "fairies" and some others.
EC seems way too high-maintenance for me. i'm all for early potty training and think most people don't give their kids the option as soon as they could, but yeah, newborns are always poopy and unless you have nothing else to do, ever, it sounds unrealistic. my sister said she knew various people who did EC, and their houses smelled like pee. so...yeah, we'll be waiting until at least six months or so before we start trying to instill potty habits.
we have a phil and teds stroller that drives beautifully. but the main reason i got it was for the detachable doubles kit and the bean is pretty much out of the stroller -- he can walk; why would he want to ride? -- so i think that may have been our big wasted purchase for the year.
and i am looking forward to being really tired...
actually, i almost am at this point. the baby is jammed under one rib and into the opposite kidney and one of my legs is starting to do weird nerve-tingling stuff and i'm looking forward to the baby being OUT! and i've (unusually, for me) been plotting the cute outfits i'm going to wear when she is, although of course i'll probably be covered with food and bleary-eyed and unglamorous in real life.
but i did buy a lipstick the other day, which for me is the equivalent of another person having a makeover, or going on a reality tv makeover show, or something (haven't worn lipstick in 5 years or so).
Aug 25 2007, 06:27 PM
Just popping in to say that the gods are merciful: lil guy has been sleeping MUCH better the past few nights. And he's napping a ton better too. He's now gotten the hang of crawling and giggles like a madman as he chases the cats around the house which I believe tires him out so thoroughly that he passes out a night. Yay!
Unfortunately, he's also taken to trying to pull himself up now. Jeez, kid! You just started crawling 2 weeks ago and already you're raring to go with the walking! Give your poor mama a break, I say!
Gren- gnomes! How stinkin' cute!
Pepper- I think poop is just a boy thing in general. My hubby thinks lil guy's poops are *eww*tastic too! (awesome word, *eww*tastic!)
Aug 26 2007, 10:31 AM
Pepper, that's what Grady does too--he is SO gassy in the morning, it's coming out both ends. Not to mention he has terrible acid reflux. We started medication 4 days ago and it doesn't seem to be doing too much so far. But, last night for the first time, we put the co-sleeper out in the hallway (his "nursery" is 2 floors down in our townhouse, so it will be a long time before we're all ready for that) and I think it was a great idea because he wasn't waking me with every tiny little noise, but I still heard him crying just fine. We put him down at 10:15, and I fed him from 12:30-2 (I fall asleep during feedings at night so they take quite a bit longer), and THEN he didn't wake up again until 6!!! 2 until 6 is so exciting! Maybe we're on our way to More Sleep! He will be 8 weeks Wednesday and we're going on a trip the last week of September...I would LOVE to be getting more sleep on the trip so we have more energy during the day.
He takes crazy long morning naps, like 3-3.5 hours around 9-12. Should I not be letting him do that? I just have a mental block with waking him, even when my breasts hurt and right now my right one is leaking all over my t-shirt. My husband pointed it out, and when I looked concerned, he said "doesn't bother me." As if I was worried that he might be offended by it and not by impending mastitis.
Aug 26 2007, 10:42 AM
aqua, not to worry 'bout the long naps. my gran always said "Never wake a sleeping baby!" and i agree (barring something drastic). their little bodies know what they need.
you can always just express a little to relieve the pressure a bit. maybe hubby would like some? little sneaks into the fridge and drinks any baby booby juice i stick in there, ha! he says it's "belicious" and "tastes like honey mom!" whatever, it's good for him too and i Certainly have enough! pepperette has been practically sleeping through the night all along so i wake up early with huge hard boobs almost every day. i express into a cloth prefold diaper half the time, i need the relief or i feel like i'll pop.
i participate in another online mama's group that's based in my area, a lot of the parents are into natural everything which i really like. i saw this there today, it's a bit scary but thought i'd post it anyhow. too often we only get one side of the story with these things. thankfully i don't have to even consider it for 12-14 years, hopefully they'll have worked out the bugs by then.http://www.judicialwatch.org/6299.shtml
Judicial Watch Uncovers Three Deaths Relating to HPV Vaccine
Event Reports Obtained from FDA Detail 1,637 Adverse Reactions to Gardasil
(Washington, DC) -- Judicial Watch, the public interest group that investigates and prosecutes government corruption, today released documents obtained from the U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) under the provisions of the Freedom of Information Act, detailing 1,637 reports of adverse reactions to the vaccination for human papillomavirus (HPV), Gardasil. Three deaths were related to the vaccine. One physician’s assistant reported that a female patient “died of a blood clot three hours after getting the Gardasil vaccine.” Two other reports, on girls 12 and 19, reported deaths relating to heart problems and/or blood clotting.
As of May 11, 2007, the 1,637 adverse vaccination reactions reported to the FDA via the Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System (VAERS) included 371 serious reactions. Of the 42 women who received the vaccine while pregnant, 18 experienced side effects ranging from spontaneous abortion to fetal abnormities.
Side effects published by Merck & Co. warn the public about potential pain, fever, nausea, dizziness and itching after receiving the vaccine. Indeed, 77% of the adverse reactions reported are typical side effects to vaccinations. But other more serious side effects reported include paralysis, Bells Palsy, Guillain-Barre Syndrome, and seizures.
“The FDA adverse event reports on the HPV vaccine read like a catalog of horrors,” stated Judicial Watch President Tom Fitton. “Any state or local government now beset by Merck’s lobbying campaigns to mandate this HPV vaccine for young girls ought to take a look at these adverse health reports. It looks as if an unproven vaccine with dangerous side effects is being pushed as a miracle drug.”
Judicial Watch filed its request on May 9, 2007, and received the adverse event reports from the FDA on May 15, 2007. Judicial Watch has posted the adverse event reports below.
(A recent study, published in the New England Journal of Medicine, also questioned the general effectiveness of Gardasil.)
Aug 26 2007, 10:40 PM
ok, i have a few questions. for the most part all is going well with lil. he has gained well past his birth weight and has the cutest chubby arms! i am not getting much sleep but feel pretty good. today i went for a walk and maybe overdid it a little although i am suprised because i walked at a mellow pace (not enough to be out of breath at all). but now i am bleeding much more than i was. i didn't feel like i was doing too much at all and would have kept walking but i ran out of time. (it was only just over an hour of slow walking). lil is 2.5 wks old. shouldn't i be ok to get out and get a little moderate exercise? another question is, he wants to nurse a whole bunch at night. by this i mean that he will nurse for an hour and then in 30 min act hungry again. so i will nurse again but i do not have much left by that point and he seems frustrated like he isn't getting enough. like i said though he is definatley gaining weight. should i worry that he is not getting enough? all logic tells me i am just being silly and worrying too much but i can't help it. last question, i have a suspicious red wedge on my right breast but no associated pain or any other signs or symptoms of a clogged duct or mastitis. i also feel that i am nursing till there is nothing left. so should i be worried? i have been massaging the area when nursing just in case. so please, mamas advise away. thanks.
Aug 27 2007, 05:15 AM
hi shiny...glad things are going well! I don't have much advice by way of breastfeeding, but as for walking/bleeding... at 2.5 weeks, your body is still in massive recovery mode. Even though you feel better (yeah!), you can't see the work your innards are doing. Take it slow. 20 min this week, with intervals of rest. Then work up slowly. I do know that moxette was a famished baby at night, b/c she just kept waking up and wanted something to suckle. And she rejected the paci outright. After 3 or 4 weeks, she started figuring out day vs. night. My cousin's two girls both acted the same, and she supplemented one bottle at midnight or so with formula, which worked for her (she breastfeed each until about 1 yr old).
We had a lovely weekend with moxette and mama. With the exception of early saturday and bedtimes, moxieman was at work all weekend, so it was just us ladies. We went to the zoo with the BFFs yesterday, which was a JOY. Imagine 2 17-19 month olds in the indoor monkey world, seeing MONKEY everywhere. One was doing a Balki-level dance of joy, and the other was running from enclosure to enclosure going "OOOOOH! OOOH!" So worthwhile. Plus, I learned about the owl butterfly and how to keep an ostrich from kicking hard (this, from BFF's 11 year old).
Aug 27 2007, 06:18 AM
i agree with you pepper, aquagirl: 'let sleeping babies lie' is my motto. earlier i'd tried waking missy up for some reason but quickly realised how stupid i had been.
i gave my little one a bath this morning, for once (as opposed to in the evening so she's supposed to settle and sleep better), and she slept for a long time and i could do my own stuff, including [leisurely] baking a banana bread! - i was very impressed. she's sleeping too tonight, didn't muck up her 'schedule'.
shinyx: my little one was like that too - and still is at 9 weeks - she would spend a long time (not so long now) having a meal at my breasts, and in half or one hr she would be wanting to suck again. thirst or comfort? we haven't figured it out, but if we let her have her way after refusing for a while she would drink in big gulps, and then fall asleep... if i give her to dad then she doesn't have an option so she eventually falls asleep, and i would have a proper 3hr-space between meals to have full breasts. otherwise, i just give her whenever, unless i'm really not up for it.
i have also been told that it's possible to not produce enough milk, but that was from someone who had one baby twenty-odd yrs ago, and anyway the more your baby sucks the more milk your body will produce, as long as you're eating and drinking well yourself. little missy gets really impatient when she's drained one breast and can't wait to work for the next bit, she'll yank my nipple and pull it this way and that and i'll have to try calm her down or give her the other one in the meantime.
i can't get pass how, while feeding, she catches my eyes and smiles - she tries to smile and suck at the same time, which doesn't work of course, then starts talking and eventually the rest of the meal is totally forgotten... so adorable. i don't want her to grow up but i can't wait for her to grow up at the same time...
Aug 27 2007, 08:08 AM
hee hee, karcher; my mom says that too -- 'let sleeping babies lie.' good advice.
pepper, i SO hope i get one like yours who sleeps through the night! the bean has been waking up at 5:40 every day (going to bed at 8:45; the tradeoff is if he goes to bed at 9:45, he wakes at 6:30), so he's great for a newborn schedule...
shiny, glad to know things are going well. i wouldn't worry about the bleeding. if that was your first major physical activity since the birth, it's natural that it should shake things up a bit and the lochia would come out faster, but that doesn't mean you're incurring bleeding that otherwise wouldn't have happened. i hiked 5 miles up a mountain when the bean was 6 days old (i know, i know) and i started bleeding up a storm where it had only been a trickle before; i had no adverse effects and felt fine. not to say everyone should go hiking less than a week postpartum, but you'll know if something's actually wrong. lochia can last a long time...mine didn't totally end until around 5-6 weeks, i think.
it is extremely, extremely rare to not produce enough milk. if lil is gaining, then do whatever you're most comfortable when he wants to comfort nurse. you should definitely call your lactation consultant (most practices have one) if you're concerned, though. if they don't have one, call la leche; they love answering questions and are very supportive.
so mox...how DO you keep an ostrich from kicking hard?
we've been meaning to go to the zoo. and i'm getting really excited to go to the pumpkin patch! last year the bean was just a bit too young to really enjoy it, but this year he's going to go bananas.
Aug 27 2007, 09:21 AM
i bled for 60 days after little but only for 35 after littlest and i trucked around all over the place after her. we went shopping in town on day two! just go at your own pace, it's all good.
Aug 27 2007, 04:54 PM
i have been out and about several times and at one point about a week go i thought maybe i had stopped bleeding but then started a little again. i am a fairly active person and can hardly wait to be back working out. i want to start training for my june rainier climb. i am just a little impatient i guess. i gained alot with this pregnancy and am ready to get rid of the extra weight.