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Thank maude I have insurance. I'm on daily Valtrex, and the prescription would cost close to $300 a month if I had to pay out of pocket.
I've had a BUST account for a while but usually just lurk. Now I'm nervous though & this seemed like the best place to get help quelling it. I found a bump on my labia and am thinking HPV. I'm sure you've all been over this stuff, but can anyone offer any reassurance? I'm convincing myself that I have it so that when I go to the doc's, and he says "yup" that I'm prepared (maybe not the best logic, but it's what I've got for now). Has anyone had any kind of positive/accepting reation from a new partner (or old partner who's new to the big news) that you could share.

Thanks in advance, busties.
oldfriend, if you have time, read through the archives for some stories about that. I have herpes and haven't yet had to tell anyone, but I dread the day I do.

Speaking of which, I've been talking to a guy online and asked him what his dealbreakers are. One was STDs. So I politely told him good luck in his search for a girl, but I'm not her. I didn't tell him why. He keeps asking why, and I just keep saying, "Good luck, I'm not the girl for you." I have to just start ignoring his emails. I'm not telling some stranger I've never met that I have an STD.
Oldfriend, yep. Look back on some posts. I had a positive experience. And a negative one I forgot to post about. So Ill post my negative one too...

My negative experience:

I was dating this guy for 5 years. 5 freakin years. All of a sudden around Christmas I get the red bumps, pain, etc. I go to the doctor and they tell me that its dry skin and I need lubrication. So after lubin it up and the sores not healing, I go to another doc and she runs tests and eventually tells me i have herpes. So I go to this boyfriend and tell him what she said and he sort of freaks out. But at the same time, not talking about it. he had some weird "if we dont say the word it wont exist" So since he and I had been having unprotected sex (monogomous deal) one day we got in a fight and he was like "do you have any idea who I feel about this?!? Now I can never have unprotected sex with anyone else in my entire life!!" Which floored me because 1. how the fuck does he think I feel?!? I am the one who just got diagnosed with a motherfucking std, bitch! and 2. we were dating for 5 years and planning on a life together. Was he planning on having random unprotected sex with people??

So needless to say, we never brought up the herpes again and I quickly wised up and dumped his lame ass.

Mr.Daisy now, whom i live with and have a life with and all that, is super accepting. Hes open about it and aware of his risks but is willing to take them and everything. He acted like when I said "i have herpes" i said "I like cookies". But at the same time he wasnt just "willynilly lets have sex" He understood that my past was a little questionable and loves me more than anything despite it.

oldfriend, I suggest going to the dr. before the sore goes away. they will just take alittle q-tip thing and swab it for the test. Or draw a little blood.

You have a great support group here and should not feel insecure about talking about it here as we have all been where you are.
And who knows? It could be just a pimple. smile.gif

Good luck and get to a dr!
old friend...the good news is that sometimes HPV can clear up on it's own. It took me a little over 2 years, but I haven't had a bump in over a year now. I never had any bad reactions from anyone about mine except fom my exhusband and it was really a toss up of who gave it to whom in that situation. Seriously, it doesn't itch, hurt, or anything else like just looks gross. When you explain it that way, most people are pretty cool about it. It's not like herpes where it itches really bad and blisters up. And something like 80% of the sexally active population has been exposed to it. Most men don't even get the bumps.

And if someone has a negative reaction about it...most likely they have other issues.
Hey, odd news. The online guy figured out why I said he should move on and find someone else. And he is totally fine with it. His STD comment was tongue in cheek and more in reference to something like HIV. Now I just gotta meet him. Wouldn't that be a fairytale? I don't know if I'm that lucky, but it still fills me with hope that I will one day meet a great man who will accept me, STD and all.
Wow, that's awesome! Are you gonna meet him? What pressure it takes off, knowing that he already knows and is fine with it.

Even if he's not the one, I know you will one day meet a great and accepting man.
Thanks for the help! I have an appointment next week, but I'm calming down about it a little more each day.
I dunno, Edie. It's starting to seem fishy to me. I don't know why. I'm sort of having a down night. I don't think I trust anyone right now.
His STD comment was tongue in cheek and more in reference to something like HIV.

I don't see how that's tongue-in-cheek. Not criticizing you for calling it that, so much as I'm annoyed at the sort of person who says something offensive or insensitive, then claims to be kidding when someone gets legitimately offended and tries to make the offended person out to be some sort of hypersensitive killjoy.

Oldfriend, I've told people I've had warts and most didn't think it was a big deal. I was going to post about a positive reaction that later turned negative but I think I'll spare you. It was in the context of an emotionally abusive relationship, anyway, and I'd only be venting rather than helping you.
Fuego, I think you are right, but he did seem very understanding and apologized for trying to be funny about something that is not especially funny. He seems sincere. I'm not writing him off as an asshat yet. I'm trying to keep positive about everything in my's helping A LOT. I'm worthy of finding someone good. It will happen one day.
kel, good luck with this bloke! i appreciate the value of staying positive... (though i also appreciate the value of quietly taking note of red flags, if you know what i mean. (i can't imagine joking about hiv being funny--?))

guess what!!! *******I no longer have hpv!!!!!******** how cool is that????? My body got rid of it in a year and a half! Go, body! smile.gif
yay octi!!! thats awesome....are you gonna get the HPV shots? I decided to get them, since i found out i had hpv, 3 of my friends were also diagnosed with it. its scary that so many people have it.
hey toasty! thanks! yep, i already got all three of the 3 hpv shots. (i wouldn't be surprised AT ALL if that's part of what helped my body clear out the strain i already have... even though the docs say it's not supposed to help with strains you've contracted previously!) i'm glad to hear you're getting the vax, too! (what sort of hpv do you have?)
Congratulations, Octi! I wish that was possible for mine!
octi, i have the warts and lesions on my cervix...but i havent had any warts in a year, so im anxious to get back in and see if its really all gone! oh and shot #2 is scheduled for next week!
Yaaaaay, Octi! Great news!
Word, kelkello. That's really awesome, octi.

I went to the clinic today and I got the same doc who did all my tests last fall. He's very nice and matter-of-fact. We did tests for all stds, including the herpes blood test. So I'll finally know. He gave me a new Valtrex prescription too. For the first time ever I didn't feel ashamed talking about it (or at the pharmacy afterwards). I just felt I was doing a responsible and positive thing. And he told me that the HPV vaccine will soon be covered by medicare (which is public) here in Canada. So I'm gonna get that when it's available.

(Hopefully all the tests are okay- I get the results in 2 weeks.)
thanks for all the congrats, ladies!

edie, good luck with your test results!
Hi ladies,

Have only lurked in this thread, but just wanted to report on my HPV vaccine experience:

I just got my first HPV shot and had a terrible reaction to it! I was so nauseous, dizzy and weak that I couldn't get up for two days. I had tightness in my chest and got winded really easily. I ended up going to the emergency room but they couldn't do anything for me.

I'm bummed out because I wanted to protect myself but I don't think I'm going to be getting the second and third shots because of how the first one knocked me out for three days. And my gyno said one shot does nothing.

Did anyone else have side effects at all?
Hey guys.

I have a questions about Valtrex:

I took it when I was first diagnosed with herpes to reduce the duration of my outbreak, but I never took it again. My doctor said she would only prescribe it to me daily if I was having frequent outbreaks, which I am not.

I have since changed jobs and haven't had insurance for a few months, but I am about to get it again.

If I take daily Valtrex, in conjunction with using a condom, will that prevent it from spreading to another person who doesn't have it? I know that condoms don't really protect a person well from herpes - at least that is what I suspect, but I would like to know if there is something I can do to prevent spreading it to others so I can have sex again.
i've noticed a lot of busties have this looming feeling that having an std somehow makes them damaged goods. makes them unlovable or unwanted. you ladies have to remember the statistics when it comes to stds.. most sexually active people have stds. isnt it like 2 in 4 people have herpes? and i read in this thread that 80% of sexually active people get some strain of hpv..? this shit is out there, tons of people get them, and it determines nothing about a person's worth. it just means a person unfortunately contracted a disease. i think if we're responsible about it, we've got to remember that it's just a part of life. something you deal with and move on.
You're right knorl. Unfortunately these messages seem to come both from within and from the outside world, at times...

What you said is very positive and it's true. And oftentimes I do feel that way. But other times, like during an outbreak, or when sex and relationships become complicated, I just wish I could be "normal." Ironically, before I contracted herpes I hadn't had much sex at all, and very little of what I had was any good. (I sometimes look back in anger, thinking "I had this perfectly good vagina going to waste!" Which makes me laugh.)

Puppykitty, in my opinion, daily Valtrex + condoms + no outbreaks = pretty damn safe sex. Of course, the kicker is that there is no guarantee. You're lucky to have insurance, I say use it and get out there. Honestly, there's no reason why you shouldn't have a great sex life!
"And he told me that the HPV vaccine will soon be covered by medicare (which is public) here in Canada. So I'm gonna get that when it's available. "

One thing to think about regarding the HPV vaccine - I've been thinking of it myself, but as with any vaccine, research is imperative I think before I get it. . . Anyhoo, I found out that the pharmaceutical GIANT known as Merck is trying to make it MANDATED. Why? They stand to make 12 BILLION dollars from it. How can a vaccine for SEXUAL health be a mandated vaccine??? Anyhoo...

Also, Merck gave a hefty donation to the governor of Texas as well as eight state legislators the same day they briefed the chief of staff on the vaccine, and now Perry's former chief of staff is a Merck lobbyist. They are pushing the mandate in Texas right now. Drug companies, argh...

But here is the disturbing thing ~ the HPV is being touted as this miracle guard. It's not. It's touted as being 100% effective against two strains of HPV associated with about 70 percent of diagnosed cases of cervical cancer. BUT, only two percent of American women carry those two strains of HPV! Their is no PROOF that it actually prevents cervical cancer (only that it reduces risk of precancerous changes in cervix).

Sorry to rant here, but this infuriates me. We are often mislead by pharmaceutical companies, and obviously our lobbyists in government... touting something as a vaccine (which, in a way, it is, but by no means 100 preventative) sounds great to the general public. Hell, a vaccine is supposed to be good for the general well-being of a population. Unfortunately, pharm companies are playing on our limited knowledge of these drugs and standing to make billions (that's BILLIONS) from us. And the whole mandating it .. that's an entirely new rant.

Regardless, my girlfriends and I are skipping it.
seven, you make a great point: it's really inaccurate and unethical for the drug companies--and media--to market this vax as a "cancer vaccine". that's how i've seen it described in all the headlines and it's simply not true: this is a vaccine against a virus that may be ONE of the causes of cervical cancer. also, you're right about the necessity for more research on the safety and effectiveness of this drug. that said, i do want to give two more HUGE thumbs up to this vaccine: it's high time that more attention is paid to women's health issues and i'm glad i have this option. despite any risks (like mermaid's terrible reaction, for one!) i think the (albeit somewhat limited) protection it provides against risky strains of HPV is well worth it for me!
is it possible for someone to have herpes but never have an outbreak on the vaginia? but say on the inside of the leg close to it?
My doctor did tell me that it only protecs against a few of the strains (he told me 4, but anyhoo) of the, what, 100 strains out there? I could not afford or justify paying for it myself, but if my government (well, fellow taxpayers) are paying for it I will probably get it. Though I am a little sketched out by mermaid's reaction...
Scorned, yes, it's possible to have an outbreak there. One of the two spots where I get outbreaks is almost on my buttcheek, right where the elastic of my underwear rubs against it.

If you're worried, please go see a doctor or go to Planned Parenthood to get checked out. Better to know and be able to treat it than be scared and powerless.

And yeah, calling the HPV vaccine a "cancer vaccine" drives me up the wall. Inaccurate, and overstating the case, is what that is.
yes, edie, it protects against 4 strains out of many (2 that are cervical cancer related, 2 that cause warts but not cancer). most of the other 100+ strains are totally harmless so theres no point in vaccinating against them.

hm... to follow up on scorned's Q: is it also possible to get herpes on the butt and/or anus from having unprotected anal sex? or is it limited to the genital area?
oxtinoxate and edie, you two make great points. it is definitely about time that women's health is becoming a priority.
octi: ref your herpes question. yes it's possible.
PK, I agree with Edie. Valtrex makes you significantly less likely to spread the disease, particularly during non-outbreak times. The CDC says that the average person with herpes only has asymptomatic shedding a couple times a year. Valtrex greatly reduces that. Combine that with condoms and a careful monitoring of your symptoms, and it's highly unlikely to spread it. However, he still needs to know so the choice can be his. I told the guy I'm dating that it's unlikely but not impossible for him to get it. We haven't slept together yet, but he has been with someone with herpes before and is aware of the risk. I told him it's the same as with pregnancy...the only surefire way to completely avoid the risk with ANYONE, including me, is to abstain. He needs to be aware of the risk and that if he should contract it, there will be no blame on me because I made him aware of the risk he is taking.
well for about 2 months now I have noticed I am getting a large boil like bump on the inside of my leg close to my period time.It hurts like hell to say the least and when it pops it burns like hell. Sometimes it is on the area of the panty line there. I just found my such loving husband had cheated on me with his ex wife whom I was told by several people she had herpes and hpv and tell of a few other things. I am getting into my doctor asap to get all the necessary tests ran, is there something specific I should ask for that they don't normally run?
Are there STD tests that they normally don't run that I should ask for? Last time I was checked for anything was when I was prego with my daughter who will be 3 in 2 months.
I have HPV went thru hell with it from my ex husband cheating on me with a friend of mine who had it. I had part of my cervix removed and was told I would never have children, however I have had 3 since and 1 miscarriage. I have my tubes tied and I am considering a full hytrometcry to hopefully not have to worry so much about the hpv showing up again.
Scorned, if you'll pardon my unsolicited opinion, your ex-husband sounds like a real prince. (Please don't get offended -- I've dated too many of that type, myself, and am still not above falling for them but it hurts my heart to see other women make the same mistakes I have.) I'm sorry he sucks.

Re: testing: if that boil isn't there when you go see the girldoc (or even if it is), ask for a blood test for herpes like the HerpeSelect. Most doctors will just look you over and if they don't see anything that they think might be herpes they pronounce you negative -- which is just not all that thorough, if you ask me. If the boil is there, also ask your doctor to culture it and type the culture so that if it is herpes you'll know whether it's HSV1 or HSV2. You might want to ask your doctor about syphilis or molluscum contagiosum (sp?) because both can cause visible symptoms on the skin. Can't think of anything else right now that you might want to ask about, but I'm sure the other Busties can.

Best of luck, hon. And please keep us posted.
Hi ladies. Has anyone here ever passed on herpes to someone even with protection? I know that this is possible, but I want to know if anyone has experience with it. I have not, but I might soon be engaging in intercourse with a guy(who knows I have herpes), and I get paranoid because I know there's no guarantee, even with Valtrex, condoms, and no outbreak. Thanks for any input.
thank you for the information. I looked up both of them. I have had a rash on both of my hands since December I think I have found a photo match in the syphillis photos. I am so pissed now. Which it is listing it as a secodanary syphillis. And according to what I have found if this is what this rash is. He is lying to me yet again. I suspected him of cheating back on November 4, 2006. Mid December this rash started on my hands. Here is the pics I found. I also found one that has blotchy skin like his has gotten. I feel like killing him right now. So glad to have tomorrow so close to me. This would also explain why we are both so tired all the time. Here are the pictures which match my hands. Now what I fear is the fact I have been bathing our daughter and my hands have been like this. I have been washing our dishes by hand!!

Here is the blotchy I was talking about

Now I am totally freaked out!!!!!

(((scorned))) That sucks! Of course I don't need to tell you to get to a doctor as soon as humanly possible.

Can you pass it on through contact just from your hands? I really don't know anything about it, but it seems like the rash is a symptom of having the infection, which is sexually transmitted...
edie52 from what i have read yes, as long as the rash is there and if any are open which pop quite often, this rash is kinda under the skin until it comes to the top. My arms are scared and it just started on them 2 weeks ago.
That means that every person I have touched or whom has been a quest to eat in my home (because of washing dishes and general conact, shaking hands) is in high risk. I am really really freaked out. It is totally curable but you know that means if that is in fact what I have and I am pretty sure it is, there is pictures to match both of us, then he is still lying about cheating before we were married. That means that when I suspected him of cheating back in November he did in fact do it. So I guess the tests results will tell the truth of all.

Here is a link to a picture of what my arms look like (except it is some guys anal hole)

I have found another link to a couple other things that have a similar rash but who know, I am going to ask the doctor tomorrow to test me for sure and wait to see the results.
(((Scorned))) Oy, what a shitty way to find out he's a lying slimeball. How are you holding up? How soon can you get in to see a doctor? (Call and tell the girldoc's secretary you've broken out in a rash and have to see the doctor immediately, if that's what it takes.)

Also, don't self-diagnose by Internet photos alone. I recall scaring the bejesus out of myself in grad school when I broke out in a rash and convinced myself it was something like this: because that's how it looked. It turned out to be pityriasis rosea, a noncommunicable rash brought on by stress, and it cleared up on its own in a month (and it was winter, so I could hide most of it under turtlenecks and scarves).
I went to the doctor on 6/8. She told me I have 50% lung capicity on both sides. I will have all test results on 6/15 when I go back.
I am crossing my fingers to get good results!! I am terrifed right now with the lung thing though. I am very worried over that.
QUOTE(kelkello @ Jun 7 2007, 09:18 PM) *
Hi ladies. Has anyone here ever passed on herpes to someone even with protection? I know that this is possible, but I want to know if anyone has experience with it. I have not, but I might soon be engaging in intercourse with a guy(who knows I have herpes), and I get paranoid because I know there's no guarantee, even with Valtrex, condoms, and no outbreak. Thanks for any input.

Hi, KelKello.
I haven't passed it, but I got it with a condom and no outbreak (and unfortunately from someone who didn't share this information ahead of time, but I'm over that.) However, I have heard it is much easier for women to contract STDs from men than vice-versa, mostly because we are built with much more surface area that is vulnerable.
Hope that helps.
Kel, I'm not certain I've ever passed it on to anyone. My most recent ex (2 years ago -- he messed me up pretty badly, and I'm sure he would say the same of me) *may* have gotten it from me but I don't know for sure because he didn't go see a doctor about it until after it cleared up and there was nothing to culture or test. I'm really skeptical of his self-diagnosis, though.

I'll tell you the whole ugly story if you want to hear it, but I'd rather not write it here. It's long and personal and it illustrates pretty well why you shouldn't date someone who's emotionally abusive if you've got an STI. Either way, he's the only one who's ever even suspected he got it from me.
Scorned, what's up with only 50% lung capacity? Are you okay? (Well, obviously not but I don't know what else to ask.) I hope all goes well when you go to the doctor this week. *hugs*
So, I got a message from the clinic today saying for me to call them back. They only call if something's up, right, but I know it's about HPV or herpes, because I went to see about my results about HIV/etc. last week (all negative), and the HPV/HSV were the only results that weren't back yet. I asked my doctor to do a blood test to see what type of herpes I have, so this isn't neccessarily bad news- best case scenario it's him saying I only have type 1, and at worst it's type 2 and a case of HPV. I'm kinda nervous. And annoyed that I'll have to go all the way down to that clinic again, and on my day off when I had pleasant things planned.

I'll report back.
Re: hpv vaccine, I just wanted to pop in and say I have my first shot a week ago and luckily had no side effects at all other than a little soreness. It was extremely pricey though. I'm in Canada so I'm glad to hear it might be covered soon.
Hi ladies! I'm new to the boards, and wanted to ask a couple of questions. Is there somewhere I can get good info on HPV? Seems like every website I look at has different information than the last. Some say it can go away on its own, some say you have it forever, some say it's no biggie b/c most people have it, some say it's contagious all the time, some say only some of the time. WTF? I'm so confused! Years ago I was told it had cleared up on it's own (but I didn't have anything but the standard pap), but now I'm hearing that it may be dormant, and I could pass it on to someone even if we use protection - that nobody knows how exactly it moves from one person to another, etc., etc. But if you look on the CDC website, the info they give you is that basically for a man, there's no test, usually no symptons, and no cure. So how do I tell some guy that I start dating that I may or may not have something that I may or may not give him and that will probably leave no sign and that he'll likely never know is or isn't there? I have no desire to pass anything along to anyone, but I also have no desire to have THAT talk, if THAT talk is not necessary. So can it go away? Or is it here to stay? Arghhhh!!! How frustrating! I'm just getting back on the dating scene after like 15 years, so this has not been an issue for me before. Any info and/or advice would be hugely appreciated!
Studentmommy, as far as I understand, the studies are all correct to an extent. Once the virus' effects stop showing up on a pap test or the warts go away, the virus is assumed to be on its way out. From that point to about the two year mark it's assumed the virus *might* still be contagious. From two years on, with no recurrences, doctors say your body has "cleared" the virus -- I guess because there's no way to tell if it's totally gone, but your immune system must've learned to fight it into submission.

I wish I could give you a better answer than that, but my sources are the same as yours. I check the Planned Parenthood, CDC and ASHA sites every couple months to make sure my info's up to date, but they don't necessarily give the exact same facts about HPV and I don't know of any other sites that might spell things out more clearly.

I might tell the guy I've had HPV x# of years ago but haven't had any recurrences, and that as far as I or my doctor know it's not possible to pass the virus to him. And then refer him to one of the websites I mentioned above in case he wants to do his own research.
Thanks fuego - it's just so confusing trying to figure out what's what with all the conflicting information out there. At least that makes a little bit of sense. One other question - does anybody know the value of getting the vaccination past the age recommended? I'm 35, but I have heard from some sources that it can still be a preventative past the recommended age and that it might be helpful in keeping the original virus from becoming cancerous if that is the strain you carry. Of course, everything's still unproven at this point since the vaccine is new - I was just curious if anyone had heard anything. My dr. was no help whatsoever with any of the questions I had. Thanks again!
i've only been with two new guys in the past few years. but one of them is/was unprotected. i'm going to go to pp and get tested for everything. how much does the hpv vac cost (sorry if it's already been discussed i missed it). also, any one else feel more comfortable discussing your status with people at pp than at your regular doc?
i dont know how much it is at pp, but at my university's health center (which is usually pretty fairly priced) they charged $125 each shot. it seems pricy but it is 100% worth it.
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