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Full Version: Crimes of Fashion part Deux...this time, it's personal.
The BUST Lounge > Forums > Absolutely Fad-ulous
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Maud help me, I have to admit it, because I am laughing my tail off right now about it. I own shoes which resemble those in every detail but the tip jar. Bought 'em in L.A. several years ago, while hanging out with Tenderloin and ActivityGirl. The store was down the way from "Hustler" and right next door to Frederick's, if I remember.

We had SUCH fun.
We've been having naked days too. Rather, undie days (bits need support!).

Anyway, finally found my notes about my two greatest train spottings, Pimp Clown and the Six Train Scallywag. (My handwriting is atrocious, by the way). Please note, I do not necessarily consider these crimes. Just very unique.

Reading from top to bottom:

Black and white skull and bones bandana
Gold hoop earring
Aviator sunglasses
Yellow and white striped t-shirt
Fanny pack with fearsome holographic decal. Arrrr!
"Who wears short-shorts? Captain Subway wears short shorts!"
White knee socks, patterned in black musical staffs with multicolored notes twisting around his calves
White Jesus mandals
Silver watch with bright red face

He was great. He continues to make my day, weeks later.

Pimp Clown

Excessively high (ie. Mad Hatter) top hat of faux leopard material
Very very long dreds, starting to go grey, accompanied by a similar beard
Plate-sized silver medallion on a chain with links so tight it looked like silver rope around his neck
Black velvet Willy Wonka-esque frock coat
On both hands, enormous rings, like he was balancing jewel-encrusted saucers on his knuckles, which rested on a heavy black cane topped with a silver skull
Couldn't see his feet

Suited middle-aged man to my right took a picture with his phone. I wasn't alone in my awe!
Bits of me are actually passing out trying to compute the mental image of white ... mandals ...

Holy. Moly.
luci is hurting me.

i live in the fashion krime kapital of kanada, i Swear to freaking Maude.
fashion hippies abound, layers upon layer upon layers of fabric and other whatnots. gah. dreads everywhere in every style and colour. and crocs. every person here has a pair, including me (bright bubble gum pink). the foot wear alone is enough to permanently blind you.

trustafarians. the expensively dirty look. there's too much to even describe to you here. i promise to try though, k? i'll start writing shit down.
That back-to-school thing was just wrong. Those kids need a visit from Stacey & Clinton.
No fair. I want a dinosaur sweatshirt.
I hate it when women wear shorts that the cooch eats, and don't pull them out of there, makes me wanna yank em out, soooo gross
Took the kids to McD's the other day after the pool.

She was in the parking lot, walking a little girl into the dining room.

She was wearing black knit gauchos--total ass munchers.
A white Popeye wife beater T-shirt--greying with age.
No bra--slightly droopy C cups.
Shower type flip flops.

Simply refreshing site.

Re:Boston Globe

Putting gauchos on children=child abuse.
Boyfriend in the denim suit is tasty, though. Just add closed toed shoes, 20 pounds, and tattooes.

Pimp Clown=George Clinton on public transport.

I love the word scalywag. Love it.
Trustafarians --> expensively dirty --> one word = Diesel
no no, they'd Never be seen wearing any kind of recognizable fashion. these kids are actually Dirty. like grungy slept-in-the-park-last-night-grass-and-weeds-in-my-dreads dirty. bare-foot-worldly-goods-in-a-sachel dirty.
dung-coloured(100%hemp)-clothing-covering-their-many-body-piercings-and-expensive-tattoos dirty.
they seem to always, Always be in smoke and frothy coffee but look like vagabonds. it's the strangest fashion statement ever.

pierced and tattooed raggedy clothes and shoe clad young woman on the pay phone at the co-op. "and my parents want me and my brother to meet them at that resort in hawaii Again this year. they booked our tickets already and everything. can you believe them?!"
i'm so not kidding.
I haven't heard the word trustafarians for years. It used to make me laugh how much reggae these idiots would listen to, considering how quite a few RAStafarians hate (with good reason) white people.

When they'd annoy me the most, I used to imagine some 1 percenters chasing them with machetes. Evil, but so satisfying.
Yes, yes, they would be seen wearing Diesel because it's not recognizable as a "brand name" -- they have jeans that look torn and oil-stained and cost 300 dollars a pair, etc. We used to make fun of Diesel because pretentious rich europeans with bad teeth would buy it thinking they were buying cool, casual American kid clothing, meanwhile, no cool casual American kid would ever spend that much for a pair of effin' jeans.

Now, of course, they sell Diesel in department stores and SOME of their items probably do have logos on them. Also, so-called hipsters are spooging all over "Sevens" or "Paper" or what have you... jeans that cost... several hundred dollars. Really, there is no end to the idiotic pretensions of pampered "hipsters" out slumming.

That could almost be a whole thread.

example: Doc Marten's were worn in the LATER years by small-town "punk" adopters in Britain because they only cost 20 dollars a pair -- then american suburban kids were thinking Doc Marten's were the "official punk shoe of original punks" and paying 80 -100 dollars for them.

argh! That whole aspect of fashion puts me straight into Cobville
Hey! I used to have a pair of diesel jeans that cost me £70 and never once have a begrudged paying it because I wore them all the time and they last years and were my favourite jeans ever. They made my non-existant arse look curvy, they went with all my tops, and they were soooo comfortable. If I could find that style again, I would spend the same amount.

Same goes for doc martens. I spent £60 on a pair and I'm not ashamed of that. They are going to last a hell of a lot longer than lots of silly high heels that cost more, and aren't going to deform my hip or feet. I can wear them for 12 hours and my feet stay cosy and comfortable and to me that is definitely worth the money.

And "rich europeans with bad teeth"? Really? I thought that teeth thing had died?

Anyway, back to the CoF - crocs have totally hit the UK. In the past week I have seen at least 20 pairs! It seems to be an invasion that followed gauchos.
Oh, gross generalisation.

Good jeans last and look good as fuck, simple as.
The reason doc martens now cost as much as they do is that - until about two years ago at least - they were still made in England, and the factory workers used to get a damned good wage. I used to live just down the road from the factory. Combined with inflation, and the simple fact that people are willing to spend £50 on a pair of shoes that will outlive them. The most I've ever paid for my docs was £90 (I think) and they're limited edition jobbies. I love 'em to pieces. The least I've ever paid was fifteen quid for a pair from the factory shop.

What bunny said about the good jeans is true. They last. I pay more because I want jeans that actually damn well fit. I tend to look at clothes in a cost-per-wear basis (shoes... not so much tongue.gif ).

Anyway, back to the CoF... lady seen two days running. Outfit Numero Uno: lime green suit. lime freaking green from head to toe. Accessorized with a lovely handbag in a baby pink and baby blue check. Outfit Numero Duo: Floral kaftan that ended at just the wrong point on her hips, white trousers (this lady works in the City, not on the freaking beach). The same bloody handbag, still clashing beyond all belief.
Theres a pair of docs I've always wanted since I was about 13 and they cost £115. If I could find them again, I'd consider spending that much. They are knee high, cherry red, and have a manga girls face airbrushed on the side.
my darlings are mid-calf, with an eye painted on each side - and barbed wire. I love the painted dms. I also have a pair of patent knee-highs that make me look like a butch hooker, and that I've always wanted to modify myself.
I could never afford the Docs around here, so I settled for a pair of black steel-toed boots made by Mac (the tractor-trailer/lorry manufacturer). They became my absolute favorite a few years ago when I was assaulted in the all-night laundrette and a misplaced kick (I was aiming for his crotch) broke his shin. Very satisfying sound, btw, and dropped him like a rock! I LOVE my steel-toed boots!

Ahem. Back to your regularly scheduled CoF:

Lady came into my work yesterday in traffic cone orange muumuu, with matching bandana on her head. Blinding.
I agree on the principle of paying money for quality, comfort, style and practicality. I have a pair of Wrangler jeans that are made from thick, soft, real denim, really sturdy, gorgreous color blue, neither faded nor too dark, that fit over my pot belly and fit not too tight and not too lose on my nice butt and legs and are not bellbottoms nor too short. They move with me beautifully. They are entirely comfortable.

I bought these for five dollars at a thrift store.

They have lasted me for five years with no holes or anything. Getting good jeans is cool, paying 200 or 300 dollars is not necessary to do that. I hate them for ganging up on us and charging us that much effing money.

Also, we would buy engineer boots or biker boots -- knee high, black, wooden heels, thick, real leather.
they cost about 80 dollars, You could wear them for years. Buy oil and polish to keep them supple, getting a hole through them or letting the leather crack is a real waste. Go to a shoemaker, the inexpensive immigrant ones in our neighborhood, not the la di dah ones, and get rubber soles and heels installed and maintained. Wear them -- up to the knee, with stove pipe jeans of blue or black rolled above (engineer boots) or tucked in (biker boots).

Yes, good in a fight, I kicked the shins of a girl in front of a stage once who grabbed me and would not let go even though I told her to several times with increasing severity and tried to get her off me other ways as well. Yes, satisfying it is. You could also get work boots for 30 dollars -- just paint them or something. With steel toes or not. Doc Marten's are 30-40 dollar work boots (that were just as solid and you could decorate them yourself) being sold for more money because of trend/image factor.

I spent 80 to 100 dollars for a black leather biker jacket and really felt like I was spending money. But I got it a size bigger so I could wear a hooded sweatshirt under it in the winter and be able to wear it three seasons of the year. The pockets are handy, and its protective both on the street and in clubs. Put Lexol or Mink oil or Neat's foot oil on it and it will slick off the rain without absorbing silicone from some bullshit waterproofing product.

My point is, not to put you down for wearing Docs or for wanting quality and wear and attractiveness, my point was that there is an attitude these days that being "alternative" is all about who can spend a lot of money -- and that is not "alternative" AT ALL.

The whole point of being punk or hippie or any other kind of alternative culture was NOT TO SPEND A LOT OF MONEY and that YOU DON'T NEED MONEY AND CONFORMITY TO BE COOL and RICH PEOPLE ARE NOT NOT NOT NOT NOT better than POOR PEOPLE.

Sometimes, that point seems lost and that is what irritates me.

I'm not trying to be an old curmudgeon, per SE. I'm an old curmudgeon for the sake of that essential concept and value.

Sign me Not Stupid
Word, Wombat. Spending money on a great piece of clothing is great, and I do it myself now that I am able to somewhat. But I wasn't able to until pretty much NOW, in my life, and nobody's mistaken me for alterna-chick recently. The very state of being financially established enough to be able to AFFORD designer or custom or whatever pieces goes against everything I ever understood to be subversive or subculture when I was a kid. But I do see kids NOW whose subculture is prefab and/or very expensive, and the look is completely different, even in those who are emulating a very old version of rebellion. They may still be rebelling, to be sure - but they're subsidized differently, and the array of what's readily available right off a hundred racks is vastly different than anything we had twenty or twenty-five years ago.

[\rant mode]
favourite jeans that have lasted me forever, $20 at suzy shier. say no more.
i'm not a punk or a hippy on the outside anymore, heck i work at the bank, but i still won't buy things new (except for underwear, socks and shoes). and may i say i look fabulous dahling!

a woman came into the store today (my 2nd part-time job) looking for yoga pants. she couldn't find them anywhere in town for less than $200 buck she said, then she made the casual comment that she wears them "every day". ugh. yoga pants are for YOGA not for wearing every day. damn stupid ugly fashion statement that one is. worse than the crocs by far. work out clothes in public grrr *pet peeve*.

not so down with the casual racist comment below however. gonna give the benefit of the doubt here but i'm still voicing my reaction so don't anybody jump all over me ok?
Thanks you guys, I was getting something off my chest, not trying to be a jerk.

All europeans don't have bad teeth or try to imitate americans, however, the particular ones that shopped at Diesel ten or so years ago would have fit in that description. but I'm not trying to be all "arrogant american"

I just think it's interesting and a little irritating that Americans will pay more for something "from EUROPE!" whether or NOT it's actually better, and it seems that goes in reverse too!!

Plus, it's okay to say, well, I buy this or that expensive thing, but, some folks seem to really thing that the more money you spend the more hip you are, when hipness has a long history of "don't give them your money, don't' follow their rules, don't kill yourself to be okay with them, do it your DAMN self!"

I wouldn't call myself a punk these days, and it's kind of annoying to see the "Look what Daddy bought me, aren't I so outrageous" type that seems so prevalent. If you're going to copy something from 25 years ago, could you at least get it right and understand the concept? And copying someone else is not creative or brave.
/end rant.

I mean, seriously, the same thing happened with glam rock -- there were left over lace vintage clothes for really cheap at second-hand stores and church sales, same with like, leopard skin stuff, and you might pay serious money for spandex pants (when they first came out, they were actually kind of attractive) or for platform boots, but , beyonod that, it was all about being TACKY and wearing bright red lipstick that hadn't been seen since your momma's day and gobbing on makeup and jewelry from woolworth's just to try to be FUN instead of all hippie dippie drab and sloppy and serious. And then Velvet Goldmine comes out and this little dude who didn't even discover any of it until the early 80s, and then at BROWN UNIVERSITY, implies that everybody just wanted to be rich and dressed up in Louis XIV outfits. It's like ()###U%Y(&*(&(@^$!!

It was still a fun movie, but GAWD.

/end rant for real.

Back to regular scheduled snarking....
Oof! On train last night, too many to count, but:

Two women, bleach fried hair, sun fried skin, mom shorts -- think, the world's most unflattering length, thin fabric in bad colors and tons of pockets -- extemely cheap, utilitarian jewelry, crappy t-shirts in matching screaming salmon with some kind of pointless extra seams, and, on their feet, both were wearing white ankle socks with white sneakers.

Has anybody noticed a trend w/ guys wearing shirts one or two sizes to small to make thier chests and arms look bigger? I am officially declaring that a COF. Especially is the shirt is a polo w/ the color flipped up.
UGH! just icky that. the mom shorts and the too small polo collar turned up. yak!
*puts collar of polo shirt down*

I think they're making the sleeves shorter and tighter... I'm seeing waaaay to much of that for it to be entirely by design.

cof: clothing from paul's boutique. all of it. you do not need "paul's boutique" plastered across the arse of your stupid denim pre-frayed-edge miniskirt. in neon pink. no. especially not with those leopard-print leggings. you just look daft and confused as to which particular scene you wish to be dressing for.

cof II: to all the minigoths and minimoshers. stop it. now. get a fucking haircut, you look like the robert smith joined panic at the fucking disco, you moron. And it's bad. Stupid bloody teenagers. You are not being individuals, you are doing what everybody else does.

*exits thread, having vented spleen*
There is a perception in Europe that all Americans look the same: same shiny straightened teeth, same mom jeans and white trainers, based on tourists they see.

I saw orange crocs at a German airport yesterday. Seems the trend is spreading...
Sludy military green coloured dress made of clingy t-shirt material with pointed, frayed "atomic blast chic" hem, black footless tights and extremo pointed toe silleto ankle boots. Simply vile!

only because I don't know where else to post this --

the feature article in bust this issue has a photo of scarlett johanson wearing imitation of christ at a fashion show. the same shot (but from the front) was used on to call out ms., who am I supposed to back here? the fab bitches at gofug, or the brilliant minds of bust? fashion or fugly? help
I personally liked the outfit pictured in Bust, with the exception of the white bra showing through the black tank top. The heels are cute and I love high waisted pants. I'd say fashion.
Ew! That outfit is ugly. Enough said.
where the hell is the picture already?!? i just suffered through three months of fug archives searching, ugh, my EyeBallz!!! dang, that was painful.

here's one for ya

fashion statement, sweeping the nation....

I understand they are very comfortable and they look amazing for activities such as gardening or washing the car and for kids seem a great idea too. I saw a really cute pair of boys wearing red ones.

But I still think they are ugly as sin

Apologies to busties who own them.

To redeem myself for my crocs hating ways - The Scarlett Vs. GFY Link
I get ya, sybarite. There certainly are enough of um ....."us" .... who look like that. It got a little embarrassing to be traveling with a school group with their giant shiny backpacks, stupid Nike logos all over their bodies, and loud, pushy, rude, know-nothing attitude.

On the other hand - my friend and I went to europe by ourselves and didn't dress like that -- and don't generally speaking.

On the other hand -- we went to Paris and instead of seeing legendary individual style, quality and proportion, we saw just about everyone dressed in jeans and "american college" sweatshirts, with their blonded and straightened hair up in a bun with a few pieces hanging out -- herds and herds of them trying to look like they were in small-town america.

On the other hand -- American men were wearing big beige trenchcoats to try to show they were upper-class businessmen -- when we went to London we saw men in navy trenchcoats that were fitted, with little cravats. Much better looking.

(I have four hands!)
QUOTE(wombat @ Aug 14 2006, 12:03 PM) *
On the other hand -- we went to Paris and instead of seeing legendary individual style, quality and proportion, we saw just about everyone dressed in jeans and "american college" sweatshirts, with their blonded and straightened hair up in a bun with a few pieces hanging out -- herds and herds of them trying to look like they were in small-town america.

I felt that way when I went to NYC. We hardly left Manhattan (our hostel was 1/2 block off Times Square), so I can't say it's just the 'burbs....I had been expecting this fantastic super-polished black and white New York City style, and everywhere, people were in baggy sweats and scruffy hair and women with no makeup....
doodle! you were in the middle of tourist central! of course people are going to be dressed like that...did you go to the east 60s-70s-80s? around park and madison and the all-important Fifth Avenue? that's where the polished folk hang and live and exploit the working class. Very posh and stupid.

People make a different sort of effort in my neighborhood...everything is very - um - artfully disheveled. They spend a lot of time and money to look really really bad...

I saw the WORST!!!!! Comeover I have ever seen in my life!!!!! It was beautifully horrific!!! I wanted to snap a pic on my camera phone, but he passed to quickly....the comeover started at the back of his head and spiraled all the way around over the forehead and back to the other side! It was incredible!!
who teaches men that white socks pulled all the way up look good with knee length shorts and golf shirts? i really am curious to know.
I will offer you the REBUTTAL of peeps who wear white socks pulled up, white sneakers, both WITH SHORTS and esp. with shorts that are floppy and posessesed of multiple storage compartments:

2) You're just a BIG SNOB!!

I am totally okay with being a big snob!

a note about crocs, at the shoe department in Nordstroms they were selling little I don't know how to describe them but these little ladybugs and letters and such to put through the holes in the crocs to "individualize" them with your name words etc. Still hideous to me!
Today I saw this lady with a huge wrinkled Nascar shirt, grey sweatpants rolled up, white sneakers, and her hair was in that half-up/half-down style only instead of one ponytail she had 2 right on top of her head. With blue scrunchies. And mall bangs.

She stood at the counter whining about how tired she was and how she was so busy all day. I was like, "Okaaay, then why don't you go home instead of scratching tickets for a half hour?"
Hee - Ginger, I think you mean COMBover. The mental image that popped into my mind when you said comeover was ... inappropriate, at best!

*Having flashbacks to "Something about Mary"*
Crocs are Teh Evil. I just don't get it. Unless you're gardening or fishing, NO.

I've seen them everywhere. They need to die.
Gingerkitty: Don't you know the Donald when you see him? biggrin.gif tongue.gif
I saw the WORST!!!!! Comeover I have ever seen in my life!!!!! It was beautifully horrific!!! I wanted to snap a pic on my camera phone, but he passed to quickly....the comeover started at the back of his head and spiraled all the way around over the forehead and back to the other side! It was incredible!!

You don't live in the Philly suburbs, do you? Because I've seen a guy who matches this exact description come into where I work several times.
Heehee I should really check my posts for typos! laugh.gif This was worse than Donald!!!

Brett, his combover twim most live in the midwest!
Every town has a recognizable "interesting" guy.

We have Bicycle Elvis. (No seriously, that's what folks call him. It's a small city.)

He has big sideburns and a black dyed pompadour, and always wears black sunglasses, and rides a bicycle all over town, carrying a plastic grocery bag full of pop bottles.
bicycle elvis *snort*!

i am loving, LOVING my ugly shoes. they are the most comfortable, dreamy squishy awsome foot gear Ever. ugly yes, but i can stand up almost ALL day long. work shoes, yes, walking to work shoes, yes, shopping shoes, yes. maudedang best shoes i ever spend 25$ on.

so ugly, so very very oooggglllyyy. i don't care.
My husband arrested our local "diaper man" once! (That's what people called him here, too.)

He was this completely normal (subjectively) dude--but when he got drunk, he'd go steal his old Daddy's depends--he'd strip down--and he'd wear the damnable things EVERYWHERE! ohmy.gif blink.gif

One time he was running in the diaper across four lanes of traffic, and fell down on the median in the diaper. Needless to say--when we got him in down at the jail--he was in solitary. wink.gif
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