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> small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
karategrrl
post Aug 22 2010, 06:07 PM
Post #1141


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Yeah, nbdx, that was a fucked-up thing for your dad of all people to say to you.

And this is not NOT an excuse for men, but I seriously think most men have never even come close to understanding what it's like to be a woman. My own Dad in many ways is very feminist (always instilled in me getting an education, being independant, learning to change a fucking car tire for god's sake) yet he made some seriously idiotic fucktwat comments when I was younger. Example: I came home from school one day (freshman year of college--I commuted and lived at home) all frazzled b/c some dipshit stopped at a stop sign said to me as I walked by, "Why don't you give me head while I wait?" To this, my dad said, "Oh, that's not so bad!" Uuuuuhhh, YEAH buddy, YOU try walking in my fucking shoes for a mile.

Sorry, didn't mean to get on a rant, but people are just amazingly clueless sometimes. MANY men think all problems can be solved with implants. Do your best to educate them, but don't hold your breath either.

nbdx, let me say that despite your "messed up" family, you sound like you turned out amazingly well. Good for you! <<hugs>>
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nbdx0645
post Aug 22 2010, 12:07 PM
Post #1142


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QUOTE(buttercups @ Aug 22 2010, 10:00 AM) *
Maybe your sister's lack of confidence has something to do with all the crap he's probably been putting in her head for years attributing her lack of certain features to any problems she's come across in life.


No, you're not offending me at all. My family is messed up. Sometimes, when they say things, I can't believe that it's real. My dad has told me that if I'm unhappy I should get implants. I'm convinced it's not going to help at all; after all, it didn't help my mother. What's the difference between saying "I'm really small, is that okay?" to your lover or "I've got fake boobs, is that okay?"

I think then men I want to attract would be more likely to RUN AWAY at the second statement.
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buttercups
post Aug 22 2010, 10:00 AM
Post #1143


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Aww thanks ladies, hope it helps in some way cause I really do mean it.

nbdx I don't want to offend you or anything but I think it's really strange that your father would talk about you and your sister like that. And does he seriously believe that success is measured by the shape and size of your body?! Wow my family has said some pretty messed up things too, but this one really pisses me off. If this were true than all the happy, successful women in the world would be supermodels. I think there are plenty of other women doing fantastic in life with plenty of physical "flaws" and it has nothing to do with luck! Ugh it seems so sexist too, basically saying once again that women are only worth what they look like. So sorry you are subjected to this bullshit. Do you have any brothers? Wonder what he would think their reason would be if they were having any problems, bet it wouldn't be their bodies...Maybe your sister's lack of confidence has something to do with all the crap he's probably been putting in her head for years attributing her lack of certain features to any problems she's come across in life.

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nbdx0645
post Aug 22 2010, 08:49 AM
Post #1144


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Hi all,
I had a big run-in with my family this weekend, and I want to talk about it. I was talking to my father about my sister, who is having all sorts of financial and emotional issues, and he said "Well she doesn't have the slim body with the huge boobs, so no wonder she doesn't have any confidence." He was naming off her friends from the past who had great bodies and are doing fantastic in life.

I got really pissed. I said, "I don't have that type of body and I'm doing great." and then he told me "That I was really lucky." Seriously?

I'm tired of being so pear-shaped; I hate having a hip measurement that's significantly larger than my bust, but I'm more tired of the idiocy that runs in my family. No wonder my mom got a boob job. >: (
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anarch
post Aug 20 2010, 04:46 PM
Post #1145


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QUOTE(strongirl @ Aug 20 2010, 05:00 AM) *
What a beautiful reply you wrote to Spot-on, Buttercups. We should all strive to be and have the kind of friend you are, to offer support with the perfect balance that you just demonstrated.


Wow, yeah. Seconded (to Spot-on and Buttercups both)!

In future when I need to combine support and balance, I'll refer to that piece of writing as inspiration and guide.
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spot-on
post Aug 20 2010, 09:28 AM
Post #1146


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From: California


I just wanted to say THANK YOU to Buttercups before I head out to work, then disappear for a few days due busy weekend ahead. Will update soon
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strongirl
post Aug 20 2010, 07:00 AM
Post #1147


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What a beautiful reply you wrote to Spot-on, Buttercups. We should all strive to be and have the kind of friend you are, to offer support with the perfect balance that you just demonstrated.
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buttercups
post Aug 19 2010, 03:15 PM
Post #1148


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I agree with Strongirl, you have been like a role model to me! Your positivity has always helped me to keep going on my bad days. I understand completely why you feel the need to have surgery, and of course it is not my decision, my life, nor my business to tell you what to do, but I just want you to know that you are an inspiration to me, and not just to me but to lots of other women like us. I don't want to tell you not to get implants if you really feel it will improve your life- I go back and forth on this all the time, and of course you're entitled to your bad days too, but I have to admit that a part of me would be saddened if you did decide to change yourself. You are a beautiful person and 100% natural and you've worked so hard to have the body that you have. It is your body and you can do what you want with it, and as a fellow smallie I will also support you in whatever you chose, but just know that I am rooting for you to remain just as you are, because that is absolutely perfect.
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strongirl
post Aug 19 2010, 01:35 PM
Post #1149


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Hi Spot-on,

Here's a suggestion: go back and re-read all your awesome, positive posts from the past 6 months or so. You helped a lot of other people when you posted them...now maybe your past self can give your present self a gift!

Hugs to you!

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spot-on
post Aug 19 2010, 11:09 AM
Post #1150


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From: California


Yep I need more yoga for sure.

Not completely got surgery out of my brain but at least my man and I talked about it which helps a lot. He's supporting me in whatever decision *I* make either way. I just feel like this has been such a recurrent issue in my life that I am nearly 40 and wonder if I can continue another 30+ years feeling like this with the flip flops of emotions. Would having bigger boobs improve my quality of life? Probably yes because my self confidence would improve. However part of me feels a hypocrite for endorsing a health & Fitness lifestyle when I'd have implants/surgery - but then as a friend said "you're an expert at making bodies smaller, not bigger - there is no natural way to make boobs bigger but there are natural ways to make bodies smaller and that's your job". The point for me is I know I have a good general body due to my job (good weight for height and 'athletic' on the body fat-muscle ratio) and it doesn't look proportionate right now cos of the lack of fullness in my boobs and that lowers my confidence.

So yeah I don't know... I am still on the fence about it all as you can see from reading my post it's all jumbled in my head. I don't know if this is just one of those down periods of my life or a turning point. Either way I have a supportive husband who is supportive in my decision and that helps a TON!

thoughts?
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karategrrl
post Aug 19 2010, 07:08 AM
Post #1151


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QUOTE(spot-on @ Aug 18 2010, 07:12 PM) *
Hey Fellow Smallies!
Well I feel a little better since my last post, but not completely out the woods yet regarding my breast size issues. I hate feeling like this. The problem for me has been that since I workout a lot (my job and training for 1/2 marathon) and have lost 30lbs in 2009 my boob fullness has gone. Not been helped by the fact that teenagers are doing summer camps at the park I run at and 98% have bigger boobs than me and they are like 15 years old!!!

I talked to my man about it all on Monday and he's made me feel a bit better about it (he's against surgery and loves me the way I am), I am called his "hot wife" at work so I kinda feel like some of this is all in my own head, but the idea of surgery hasn't left my mind completely... yet... Swings and roundabouts on the emotion train! I will say that yoga is helping me a lot, I've been practicing a few times a week and as one of my Yogi's says "if you think positive and turn all negatives into positives, eventually negativity will no longer be able to penetrate your aura" I need to do more yoga and positive thinking practice!

Yep Vanessa Paradis was big in the 80's too, she had a hit song in the UK with a French song "joe le taxi" it was huge at the time and all the school boys fancied her like crazy!


spot-on, amen to ALL you said!!!! Yes, the yoga is a BIG help for me too. Thank you for the positive reminder about the negatives/positives. I'm not a pro at it yet, but thinking positively and looking for positives rather than griping about negatives REALLY helps.
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spot-on
post Aug 18 2010, 02:12 PM
Post #1152


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From: California


Hey Fellow Smallies!
Well I feel a little better since my last post, but not completely out the woods yet regarding my breast size issues. I hate feeling like this. The problem for me has been that since I workout a lot (my job and training for 1/2 marathon) and have lost 30lbs in 2009 my boob fullness has gone. Not been helped by the fact that teenagers are doing summer camps at the park I run at and 98% have bigger boobs than me and they are like 15 years old!!!

I talked to my man about it all on Monday and he's made me feel a bit better about it (he's against surgery and loves me the way I am), I am called his "hot wife" at work so I kinda feel like some of this is all in my own head, but the idea of surgery hasn't left my mind completely... yet... Swings and roundabouts on the emotion train! I will say that yoga is helping me a lot, I've been practicing a few times a week and as one of my Yogi's says "if you think positive and turn all negatives into positives, eventually negativity will no longer be able to penetrate your aura" I need to do more yoga and positive thinking practice!

Yep Vanessa Paradis was big in the 80's too, she had a hit song in the UK with a French song "joe le taxi" it was huge at the time and all the school boys fancied her like crazy!
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karategrrl
post Aug 18 2010, 01:47 PM
Post #1153


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QUOTE(anarch @ Aug 18 2010, 05:39 AM) *
I googled to see if there was a medical writeup about it and couldn't find much, but did come across an article on boob augmentation that mentioned the risk of losing nipple sensation entirely. Yikes.

I don't think larger (natural) breasts necessarily means less sensitivity, but it has been well-documented that partial or total loss of nipple sensitivity is a common side effect of augmentation. On an anecdotal note, a former acquaintance's wife had got implants. He swore she no longer had the sensitivity she once did. I would never want to risk losing that!

I think Paradis looks amazing, especially for having had two kids! I don't care for that bandeau, though--not flattering at all, in my opinion.
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anarch
post Aug 18 2010, 12:39 AM
Post #1154


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Love Paradis's bandeau.

Can't remember if it's come up in here before (probably), but I read somewhere, and bfs have mentioned, that small breasts often seem to be particularly sensitive especially the nipples. My sweetie's been going to town on mine in the past couple of weeks so, damn, I'm glad I've got the boobs I do.

I googled to see if there was a medical writeup about it and couldn't find much, but did come across an article on boob augmentation that mentioned the risk of losing nipple sensation entirely. Yikes.

Stereotypes of what's "normal" and "desirable" can fuck us up badly if we focus on them and not what real, caring, loving, respectful people find normal and desirable, is what I'm thinking.
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discowombat
post Aug 17 2010, 11:18 PM
Post #1155


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QUOTE(strongirl @ Aug 17 2010, 10:59 PM) *
May I point out that Johnny Depp could have his pick of pretty much any big-boobed woman in the world he wants?
May I point out that if your boyfriends would rather be with a big-boobed girl than you, they would be?


That is the most useful thing I've heard in awhile. Good points and thank you!
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strongirl
post Aug 17 2010, 09:59 PM
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Smokin' hot photos of Johnny Depp (I love him!) and Vanessa Paradis. They sell her short tho - she more than "plays the guitar", she's a very successful pop singer and musician in Europe. And yeah, they're both gorgeous and talented. And she's got very lovely very small breasts.

May I point out that Johnny Depp could have his pick of pretty much any big-boobed woman in the world he wants?

May I point out that if your boyfriends would rather be with a big-boobed girl than you, they would be?
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starship
post Aug 17 2010, 05:33 PM
Post #1157


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I don't know if she's been mentioned here before but omg I dunno how Johnny Depp's partner slipped under my radar for so long...

Look

Sorry if this is old news to you guys but I had to head straight over here after making this discovery lol. Her body and colouring reminds me a bit of myself
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karategrrl
post Aug 17 2010, 07:01 AM
Post #1158


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QUOTE(nbdx0645 @ Aug 17 2010, 12:02 AM) *
I feel terrible that I even brought it up.

Oh, don't be. We've all been there. It's reassuring not to feel so alone.

QUOTE(nbdx0645 @ Aug 17 2010, 12:02 AM) *
We're not disappointing others because we have small breasts. We're disappointing others because we fail to see our bodies like those who love us. We're missing out on our true potential. That's something that can't be measured in a cup size.

OMG, well said!!!
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nbdx0645
post Aug 16 2010, 07:02 PM
Post #1159


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Everybody sounds so down on themselves. (Hug)

It's hard not to compare ourselves to other women, but we really ought to stop it. You're rarely going to win a comparison against someone else. If you do feel that you 'win' the comparison, you start to feel shallow and vain. You might even see a woman who is your size, and you might become unhappy with her appearance, because you're projecting yourself on to her. You might pity her because you pity yourself. This is why comparison is bad. Comparison should be avoided.

Teens also run from AAA to K, so it would be good to keep that in mind too. I feel terrible that I even brought it up. Some girls might be delighted that you feel really down on yourself; others might get really depressed knowing that they're making other women feel inadequate and ashamed. For me, I don't really feel 'outbreasted.' I don't feel like they are competing with me. They are young girls who have different needs and interests. It's just...I want to know what it feels like to have a heaviness in my chest. I wonder if I would have had a better youth if I didn't get teased about my breasts.

It's really hard for me to come to terms with "this is all you get." I'm working really hard to accept that. Getting over the sadness is a life-long exercise regimen -- some days it's easy; you feel good and you're happy. Other days, it's a bitch to drag yourself out of bed and train. You feel so much resistance from the media, or from friends and family, or yourself...but you have to lift that weight off yourself and refocus those feelings. Think about why you might feel this way. Think about who is telling you to feel this way. Remind yourself that you want to get away from these feelings. Think about all the things people have complimented you on. Think about those who will go to war for your small breasts!

We're not disappointing others because we have small breasts. We're disappointing others because we fail to see our bodies like those who love us. We're missing out on our true potential. That's something that can't be measured in a cup size.
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starship
post Aug 16 2010, 04:41 PM
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QUOTE(limousine @ Aug 16 2010, 12:04 AM) *
I just spent the weekend with two of my best friends from out of town who have huge boobs and flaunt them more often then not. One of them is especially fit with huge ones that cannot go unnoticed. I secretly don't want them to meet my boyfriend. I know they will meet one day and I just dread that day. Has anybody else ever felt this? Part of it is jealousy, and a lot of it is feeling inadequate, like he will totally notice their chests and it just serves as a reminder of how small mine are.


definitely. I don't even have a boyfriend right now but I still worry about the thought of introducing him to my family when i do get one- crazy. My cousins are literally gorgeous. And they actually have nice personalities too. I doubt (hope) that anything would actually happen between a guy I'd date and a relative of mine, but it still really upsets me to know(trust me, i know) that he'd be gawping at and probably lusting after them.
Its not just that they have big boobs btw. They all have amazing hair, pretty faces, perfect teeth etc etc too. sucks to be the 'flawed' one in virtually every department.
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