The Lounge Guidelines Help Search Members Calendar Blogs

Welcome Guest [ Log In | Register ] ]

75 Pages V  « < 46 47 48 49 50 > »   
Reply to this topicStart new topic
> Mooooving on!!!!!
snarky7
post Aug 3 2007, 11:47 PM
Post #941


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 371
From: If I'm posting, I'm not at Zumba!


aw, jami - how long til you are out? you so need away from that and from them. it is hard to see that. besides, you need to find yourself a fab guy too, and how can you do that when you have them to deal with? i can't believe she could be preggo... just wrong and awful. but hey, brightside, if she is, she'll soon be lacking the stamina and desire to have sex with your ex - might piss him off to be without ANY.... ha ha ha, sucks to be him.

hang in there!
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
jami
post Aug 3 2007, 08:51 AM
Post #942


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 1,281
From: I'm back to life in California


son only was looking at father.
he hates her anyway for what she's done to us. (she was the one seeking out husband)
and there's a 18 year difference there, too.


--------------------
You will travel through the valley of rejection.
You will reside in the land of morning mists.
And you will find your home.
Though it will not be to where you left it.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
nickclick
post Aug 3 2007, 06:08 AM
Post #943


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 2,134
From: jersey


no way! did your son notice that too? how does/would he feel about that?

hang in there.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
jami
post Aug 2 2007, 08:33 PM
Post #944


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 1,281
From: I'm back to life in California


hey Nickclick - husband and girlfriend just came here and left. son was outside with me, dad waved at son. I could see her belly from up in the pickup from where I stood on the porch - she looks pregnant! I have not seen her face to face in three months. ohmygosh, what is going on now?


--------------------
You will travel through the valley of rejection.
You will reside in the land of morning mists.
And you will find your home.
Though it will not be to where you left it.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
jami
post Aug 2 2007, 09:01 AM
Post #945


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 1,281
From: I'm back to life in California


Nickclick - you're not kidding there!


--------------------
You will travel through the valley of rejection.
You will reside in the land of morning mists.
And you will find your home.
Though it will not be to where you left it.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
nickclick
post Aug 2 2007, 08:21 AM
Post #946


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 2,134
From: jersey


QUOTE(jami @ Aug 1 2007, 10:02 PM) *
thanks for the good thoughts. car died. again. four times in two months. how can I get an estimate when I can't drive the car to the shop that's an hour away? husband will not fix nor approve repairs for son's vehicle either.
prisoners once again.
yeah. my husband and his girlfriend. they live next to me three days a week, and they're at her place for the weekend. it's hard on son. he won't even go outside. he's heard them, too.
I think things will be better - once we're OUT OF HERE.
~jami~

things will definitely be much much better when you're the hell outta there!
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
jami
post Aug 1 2007, 07:45 PM
Post #947


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 1,281
From: I'm back to life in California


thanks for the good thoughts. car died. again. four times in two months. how can I get an estimate when I can't drive the car to the shop that's an hour away? husband will not fix nor approve repairs for son's vehicle either.
prisoners once again.
yeah. my husband and his girlfriend. they live next to me three days a week, and they're at her place for the weekend. it's hard on son. he won't even go outside. he's heard them, too.
I think things will be better - once we're OUT OF HERE.
~jami~


--------------------
You will travel through the valley of rejection.
You will reside in the land of morning mists.
And you will find your home.
Though it will not be to where you left it.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
smarttart
post Aug 1 2007, 10:00 AM
Post #948


BUSTie
**
Posts: 24


Definitley sounds a lot like my situation, sounds like you've got a great guy there. I've been in such bad relationships for so long- this guy treats me like a princess and it's so hard to believe that he's for real. I didn't mean it to sound like there is NO chemistry- actually, there is alot. I find all the cute things he does and says so attractive, and the sex is actually pretty good. It's just, when it comes to having sex- I get overwhelmed and sort of dissapointed. I feel like the last guy ruined all sex for me because of how intense and connected we were. But maybe you're right, snarky...it's just a different sort of connection with this guy.


--------------------
"for if there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life" --- Albert Camus
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
snarky7
post Jul 31 2007, 10:58 PM
Post #949


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 371
From: If I'm posting, I'm not at Zumba!


smarttart - my new crush sounds a bit like yours - very kind and considerate, not totally tops in looks, but you have to look past that perhaps. tho very different than others i've had relationships with, what i find ultimately sexy in him is that he really cares to know what i'm thinking and feeling and wants to make me feel special. i find myself more attracted to him every time we have spent time together... the funny thing is that the passion is there i think...it's not the OMG knock-you-down rip-your-clothes-off sort of passion, but more the passion of the mind (okay, that's dang cheezy)... i certainly do the compare/contrast thing, and this new one is so not like any other guy i've known...i think i could be into him, maybe even into him a little too much... it scares me cuz of where i've been before and now i'm thinking he could be too good to be true.

i would add, tho, that you say you've been dating 2 months - if the attraction isn't there enough to get you hot-and-bothered, even occassionally, then i'd wonder why not? is it you and your compares? or maybe do you just like him as a friend? it would be hard for me to have a relationship without thinking there was some chemistry in the bedroom somewhere along the way... anyway, food for thought....
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
princess_dander
post Jul 31 2007, 05:06 PM
Post #950


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 263
From: Under the radar


Oh I so want to live alone. Oh gosh I feel like I am 14 again! Wah!

Glad something that we said helps.


--------------------
always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
smarttart
post Jul 31 2007, 03:23 PM
Post #951


BUSTie
**
Posts: 24


Thanks you guys- that helps.
Princess, I know- I had that fantasy and I finally live alone- it's wonderful. And when I moved I really didn't want to date either, I was so happy with myself, my job, my great apt! And this dude and I started hanging out and next thing you know I have a boyfriend!

Nick-Click, I'm 31 and have dated a lot. How can I still feel so clueless? I think I feel a lot of pressure, we just got back from a wedding where I met all his friends and some family, and all his friends are now some of my only friends cause I just moved here. It's just a lot. I just don't know if I need to completly stop seeing him or just take it super slow- be firm about taking time for myself and not letting this thing go too fast. I feel suffocated sometimes. The thing is- I'm really attracted to him after I haven't seen him in a couple days. And yes, I do compare him- I always do that and I feel like I will never be satisfied!


--------------------
"for if there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life" --- Albert Camus
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
princess_dander
post Jul 31 2007, 08:08 AM
Post #952


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 263
From: Under the radar


Smarttart, It sounds very complicated. I think that if you are having relationship mood swings like the ones you have described then a long break to figure things out is in order. I have had those before and it is hell because you can't figure out what the hell is going on.

Thanks Nclick. The problem is that we both went in to this apartment and now that the idea has fallen apart (much due to her inability to find a job) and now until we both find places to live we are stuck with each other. We are staying in a friend's place who is seldom here and doesn't care how long we stay because now we have very cheap rent. I am trying to leave ASAP and every day it is hell b/c we share a bed and she is always here, now as I type!

My fantasy now is to live in a studo apartment with my cats reading books and study and never date again! I have a handle on my anger and sadness and have a great sense of humor about it all. it just sucks...a lot.


--------------------
always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
nickclick
post Jul 31 2007, 06:42 AM
Post #953


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 2,134
From: jersey


princess, you gotta do what's best for you. of course you're worried about hurting her, but you are probably hurting her more than you want to by staying there, not being there for her, not letting her get on with her life without you.

smartt, i don't know your age, but i kind of went thru the same thing with my two big relationships, and i attribute the passion and intensity of my first one to us being 20 years old, and it being our first love. i started my 2nd (and current) relationship at 30 and was worried at first that because i didn't feel that constant need to jump his bones that it meant i wasn't into him. it's just different. i'm turned on when he's a sweetheart or when we crack up together, more than just because he's hot. i dunno. i guess i'm grown up now to know that a relationship is going to last on more than passion, and that it doesn't last forever.

ick, i sound like a fuddy duddy. i guess my advice is to wait and see. on the other hand, you have to be hot for him, and maybe it's just not happening. but try to think about him without comparing.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
smarttart
post Jul 30 2007, 07:46 PM
Post #954


BUSTie
**
Posts: 24


princess, I know that feeling of just wanting to be alone! It's sweet of you to not want to hurt her- but you need to take care of your feelings too. It's soooo hard to do in a living situation- I've been through that too. Ugh-


O.k., so I don't know if this is where I should post this- but I need some help. Last year I met a guy and we dated off and on for just a bout a year. We were so bad for each other, faught all the time, he couldn't commit etc. But, there was this intense passion that I haven't ever felt before, I felt like he was the first guy I've ever been in love with.


Through this I think I realized what I really want and DONT want in a relationship. Fast forward, I moved to different city and cut all ties with him. A couple weeks later, start hanging out with another guy and I really like him. We have sooo much fun together- he has all these qualities i'm looking for. We've been dating for almost two months. BUT, sometimes I feel like I'm really attracted to him- sometimes I think I'm not at all! AND I don't know if I'm in love- now that I've experienced that intense passion.


I'm confused- some of my friends think that the "passion" was just that we were always fighting and it was either really good or really bad- you know that kind of intense energy. This new guy is like my best friend- so kind and considerate.
Ugh- I just don't know what to think - I can't even have sex because I'm thinking about how great it was and the connection I had with the other!! Do you think this is a rebound? Do I need more time? Should I just wait it out and see? I just don't want to hurt him. He said he'd give me as much time as I need.


--------------------
"for if there is a sin against life, it consists perhaps not so much in despairing of life as in hoping for another life in eluding the implacable grandeur of this life" --- Albert Camus
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
princess_dander
post Jul 30 2007, 04:04 PM
Post #955


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 263
From: Under the radar


I agree with Nickclick on the definition of "rebound", at least that is the only way in which I have heard it used.


I am having a hard time dealing with the situation my girlfriend and I are in. I know that I need to be alone, but I can't cut ties with her because of a few reasons, most having to do with money and not wanting her to suffer. Because of this, we are still living together and I am crawling up the walls needing to be alone, but can't. It sucks and i can't wait until to live alone. I don't want to hurt her, but I am torn in half so much these days. I have it together, but the stress is so much to deal with at times.

Thanks for letting me vent.


--------------------
always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom!
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
nickclick
post Jul 25 2007, 08:10 AM
Post #956


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 2,134
From: jersey


i've always thought that 'rebound' meant dating or fucking someone too quickly after a long-term relationship, especially with the explicit purpose to try to get over the long-term ex.

i wouldn't say dating someone shortly after is always gonna end up badly though. i know when i was in the last legs of my previous lt relationship, i spent a lot of time thinking about the kind of partner i wanted (and how he wasn't it). so when i met someone not too long after our breakup, i kind of knew he fit the description.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
jami
post Jul 24 2007, 04:51 PM
Post #957


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 1,281
From: I'm back to life in California


ok - so 'rebound' is a term used by people who:
a- wanted you to stay with ex
b- were never happy in a relationship themselves
c- other
I've heard the term - but not understood it really. thought is was a term for going into a new relationship too quickly.
and this is bad?
ladies - talk to me.


--------------------
You will travel through the valley of rejection.
You will reside in the land of morning mists.
And you will find your home.
Though it will not be to where you left it.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
snarky7
post Jul 24 2007, 02:37 PM
Post #958


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 371
From: If I'm posting, I'm not at Zumba!


ah the dreaded rebound subject - maybe it fits here? jami, IMO, i'm not totally sure that if you break up with someone (married, dating, other) that you can ever really have a "rebound" - because if you think about it, all we'd ever have after boy #1 in our lives would be one rebound after another... i think the people who worry about the rebounds are those who either a) were really happy you and your ex were together and now they are not as pleased or cool.gif those who have been continually f'ed over in relationships and can never be happy and maybe there's a c group in there, but who knows.... i can say i've had the rebound guy or two in my life - to me they were the ones i didn't care about and the ones who served their short-lived purpose of making me happy in an otherwise unhappy time. i have had friends who married the one termed the "rebound" guy and have found themselves happier than ever... i don't know...other thoughts from the board?
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
jami
post Jul 24 2007, 12:03 AM
Post #959


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 1,281
From: I'm back to life in California


snarky7 + glassk + nickclick (hugs to you all)
thank you for the posts of encouragement. I need 'em. latest is a court appointment for a psychologist for son. in other words- has-to-go not only is he not happy about that, ex informs son HE(the ex) is drving young son- three hours each way! son said this to respond - no fucking way I am going anywhere with him! but today he was TOLD (aka ORDERED) to go with his dad. no wonder son is confused. son is pissed.
so on the good side,father talked with son. bad side, orders son to go where son does not want to go or do.
gotta get thru tomorrow to see what's gonna happen.

on a completely new track - and dierct me to the correct bust lounge...
what is "rebound"
please someone answer.
and why do they make it sound so bad?
~whoa. sleeping pills definately kicking in now ~~
email me guys... in cluding on 'rebound guy'
thanks much
~jami~


--------------------
You will travel through the valley of rejection.
You will reside in the land of morning mists.
And you will find your home.
Though it will not be to where you left it.
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post
snarky7
post Jul 23 2007, 08:08 PM
Post #960


Hardcore BUSTie
***
Posts: 371
From: If I'm posting, I'm not at Zumba!


jami - keep standing on your own two feet....you'll be better off!
Go to the top of the page
 
+Quote Post

75 Pages V  « < 46 47 48 49 50 > » 
Reply to this topicStart new topic
2 User(s) are reading this topic (2 Guests and 0 Anonymous Users)
0 Members:

 

Lo-Fi Version Time is now: December 18, 2014 - 04:08 PM