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> small breast support group - (I need it even if they don't)
hcbeck
post Mar 6 2009, 08:08 PM
Post #2461


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From: Babylon and Ting


QUOTE(karategrrl @ Mar 6 2009, 08:54 PM) *
...and if you will all forgive a man-hating moment, I wonder if men (perpetuators of most of this behavior) would keep doing it if they had to endure any of it growing up and knew what it was like.


Sadly, even speaking as a man, I think some would still perpetuate this behaviour, even if they were victims of it at other times in their life. Such is the nature of power and the way one defines oneself. Even the bullied themselves sometimes bully others.

I don't know about schools today, but when I was a teenager, part of the definition of 'male' and 'female' was 'pursuer' and 'pursued.' I suppose the majority of boys find that definition too seductive to resist.

I guess being human isn't enough.
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honeybunch
post Mar 6 2009, 04:40 PM
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QUOTE(karategrrl @ Mar 6 2009, 02:54 PM) *
Oh. My. God. What a powerful essay!!!!!

It's crazy how I could relate on so many levels. Having a totally different body type (tall/thin/small breasts), it is so interesting to read about her experiences from "the other side" but actually, I had many similar experiences. My small breasts by themselves didn't get attention, but I think I had that Lolita look: half girl/half-woman which somehow drove some males nuts. I remember a creepy teacher making comments and another idiot who exposed his penis to me on the street on my way home from school when I was in FOURTH GRADE; being groped on public transportation; propositioned by strangers in cars or on the street; having my ass grabbed by half a class of boys in junior high school (and then having my "friends" blame ME for not "doing anything"--as if I was supposed to fight off 20 boys by myself...)... The list goes on and on.... One of my most horrifying memories was walking home from college and having some asshat stopped at a Stop sign say, "Why don't you give me head while I wait?" My anger only turned to horror when I complained to my dad about it and he said, "Oh, that's not that bad." WTF??!!!

I remember seeing big-breasted girls get grabbed and talked about in school, and it made me mad. I have to agree with the author that it's not breasts or bodies of whatever size that cause problems, it's our damned attitudes. My body type is different from the authors', but I've experienced so many of the same things--unwanted male attention, women saying they "hate you" like it's a compliment, people perceiving that how I am as a person goes according to some mental filter of how they think people with my body type "are."

...and if you will all forgive a man-hating moment, I wonder if men (perpetuators of most of this behavior) would keep doing it if they had to endure any of it growing up and knew what it was like. I can't tell you of how many times I've tried to communicate my experiences to boyfriends/male friends and they DO NOT GET IT.

Very powerful article. Thanks for sharing, purplestain.

PS: The "Melons" contest--in a school!!???



I also had middle aged men hitting on me as young as 12, but I sincerely think they didn't realize I was only 12,13.

I knew a girl who had a similar body type. She was quite toned, thin and athletic from the waist down, but I promise you she must have been an E cup at least. I can't say I envied her breasts. Boys made comments. Another girl I knew with a similar body type had boys comment to her face how big her breasts are. "You have big breasts." I mean WTF she has about 10 lbs of breasts on her chest do you think she needs you to remind her??? I just wanted to be like STFU and keep you TONGUE and your EYES in your effing head. I got those kinds of comments,too, as if I need a reminder that I have small breasts, and it was usually said with disgust.

I remember watching some show with Lisa Ling. She went to a high school. She had all the students in a gym and divided the girls and boys.

She asks which girls had been sexually harassed and every single female raised their hand. mad.gif

Then the boys were asked if they had ever made inappropriate comments about a girl. All of them raised their hands. Some of them said they thought that's how boys are supposed to act. I mean seriously? Do some guys think women are here for their own pleasure? mad.gif mad.gif mad.gif I can't say I'm surprised-I read somewhere that objectifying women can be a male bonding experience.

I don't think guys get it at all. I don't even think most of them give it a second thought.

And my feminist rant is over before I puke.
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karategrrl
post Mar 6 2009, 03:54 PM
Post #2463


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Oh. My. God. What a powerful essay!!!!!

It's crazy how I could relate on so many levels. Having a totally different body type (tall/thin/small breasts), it is so interesting to read about her experiences from "the other side" but actually, I had many similar experiences. My small breasts by themselves didn't get attention, but I think I had that Lolita look: half girl/half-woman which somehow drove some males nuts. I remember a creepy teacher making comments and another idiot who exposed his penis to me on the street on my way home from school when I was in FOURTH GRADE; being groped on public transportation; propositioned by strangers in cars or on the street; having my ass grabbed by half a class of boys in junior high school (and then having my "friends" blame ME for not "doing anything"--as if I was supposed to fight off 20 boys by myself...)... The list goes on and on.... One of my most horrifying memories was walking home from college and having some asshat stopped at a Stop sign say, "Why don't you give me head while I wait?" My anger only turned to horror when I complained to my dad about it and he said, "Oh, that's not that bad." WTF??!!!

I remember seeing big-breasted girls get grabbed and talked about in school, and it made me mad. I have to agree with the author that it's not breasts or bodies of whatever size that cause problems, it's our damned attitudes. My body type is different from the authors', but I've experienced so many of the same things--unwanted male attention, women saying they "hate you" like it's a compliment, people perceiving that how I am as a person goes according to some mental filter of how they think people with my body type "are."

...and if you will all forgive a man-hating moment, I wonder if men (perpetuators of most of this behavior) would keep doing it if they had to endure any of it growing up and knew what it was like. I can't tell you of how many times I've tried to communicate my experiences to boyfriends/male friends and they DO NOT GET IT.

Very powerful article. Thanks for sharing, purplestain.

PS: The "Melons" contest--in a school!!???
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honeybunch
post Mar 6 2009, 06:37 AM
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Im gonna come back and say more later, but I do want to say that I'm disgusted and horrified teachers or anyone else would stand by and watch her get sexually and verbally assaulted!!!
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purplestain
post Mar 6 2009, 05:29 AM
Post #2465


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From: California


This article (http://www.thefword.org.uk/features/2008/12/i_was_saddened) was linked over in the Big Busties thread. It's an essay in which the author describes growing up with what many called a "perfect figure" (23" waist and E-cup breasts) and how she was treated because of it: groped and harassed by strangers, constantly put down by women, stereotyped as an airhead. I'm linking to this because of the points she makes near the end of the essay, which apply to all women, no matter their breast size:

"It’s not my problem that my breasts “don’t suit my personality”. The problem is that there is a personality type associated with having big breasts in the first place. We don’t need implants and breast reductions. What we need is to cure our society’s complete obsession with breasts. We need somehow to do away with the idea that breast size is directly proportional to sexual attractiveness, and that a sexually attractive woman is somehow deserving of harassment and contempt."
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starship
post Mar 3 2009, 06:03 PM
Post #2466


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for any UK-ers the 'Teen boob jobs' program we were talking about before is on ITV1 in like 10minutes. it'll probably be too late by time anyone actually reads this but heyho

xx
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KeraBear
post Mar 1 2009, 01:17 PM
Post #2467


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Posts: 265
From: USA


QUOTE(karategrrl @ Feb 27 2009, 01:29 PM) *
OMG, I so know what you mean! I got my period at, like, age 11, but without breasts (at a time when all my friends were sporting hormonally-induced large teen breasts), no one really knew. Sometimes I felt like, "What do I have to do to prove it--wave around a used tampon?" Ew, I know. But you catch my drift? wink.gif


Ha ha... yea, but for the longest time I couldn't even do that much. I didn't get my first period until the summer between my freshman and sophomore years. And yes, ew. laugh.gif
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angie_21
post Feb 28 2009, 08:49 PM
Post #2468


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Posts: 662
From: Alberta


QUOTE(hellotampon @ Feb 28 2009, 11:39 AM) *
Thank you thank you thank you! I totally hate that. Some girl will say (right in front of me), "I wouldn't want big boobs anyway because they're disgusting [in some specific way]." Or, "At least I know I got everything I have in life because I deserve it and not just because I have big boobs" and I'm like hey, maybe you got that job because you have a great ass!? laugh.gif

I have a flat, shapeless butt. I WISH I had a nice one. Big butts are pretty much on par with big boobs these days, and either way I'd look more proportional if I had one. I can't imagine myself disrespecting women with more ample bottoms than me... I don't even see how that would make me feel any better?



So true! Besides, I can see that it might be a lot harder for large-chested girls facing discrimination and assumptions about their intellgence. I constantly run into a stereotype that I am intelligent or prudish, between haing glasses and small boobs. It's annoying, but it would be so much worse to be judged the opposite way!

I used to have a friend who was self-conscious about her weight, and would make herself feel better by putting down skinny people, saying things like, "she itn't even hot, she has no boobs at all!" right in from of me. I wanted to shake her silly! But I know it is about her insecurities, not mine - a lot of people have no idea of the effect of things that they say.

Anyhoo - as some people have said here, it is good to take a break! the more you obsess about it, the more important it seems. I rarely think about this in my day-to-day life, but I am here because I want to help give support to those girls that are still self-conscious about their own body issues. But when I go out into the real world, I don't let my cup size (or butt size!) influence any decisions I make or how I feel about myself, because it's not how we look that's important.
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hellotampon
post Feb 28 2009, 01:39 PM
Post #2469


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Posts: 1,018
From: Connecticut


QUOTE(KeraBear @ Feb 27 2009, 02:12 AM) *
Here's an observation i've made. On some of the teen forums I go on, ocassionally (okay, frequently) a girl will make a post about how sad she is that she has small breasts, yadda, yadda, yadda and then other girls come to her aid saying things like "Be glad you don't have large breasts, they are ugly and saggy" Now i can see why they would say something like that to try to make her feel better about herself, but then how are the girls with big breasts supposed to feel. Can't we lift up our small breasted sisters without resorting to putting others down?


Thank you thank you thank you! I totally hate that. Some girl will say (right in front of me), "I wouldn't want big boobs anyway because they're disgusting [in some specific way]." Or, "At least I know I got everything I have in life because I deserve it and not just because I have big boobs" and I'm like hey, maybe you got that job because you have a great ass!? laugh.gif

I have a flat, shapeless butt. I WISH I had a nice one. Big butts are pretty much on par with big boobs these days, and either way I'd look more proportional if I had one. I can't imagine myself disrespecting women with more ample bottoms than me... I don't even see how that would make me feel any better?
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honeybunch
post Feb 27 2009, 05:03 PM
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QUOTE(anarch @ Feb 26 2009, 02:04 PM) *
o/t, but I thought some of you might be interested in this article & discussion about breast cancer & breast augmentation

thanks angie_21 for the 007b site. Very interesting to see real boobs of all shapes and sizes and life stages.


Geez@ the doc's comment!!!

I was reading in the February issue of FitnessRx for women (love the mag!) that breast implants increase risk of some rare breast cancer. That couldn't have come at a better time for me.
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karategrrl
post Feb 27 2009, 01:29 PM
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QUOTE(Persiflager @ Feb 27 2009, 02:25 PM) *
*delurks*

I'm a larger-boobed Bustie and I lurk here for the super-zoomy vibes of positivity! The posts here make me feel gorgeous and strong in every way, not just in the bosomy area smile.gif

*relurks*


YIPPEEEE! laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif


QUOTE(Kera Bear @ Feb 27 2009, 02:25 PM) *
Being short, with virtual no hips, my tiny booblets create the illusion that I am a 16-year-old who has not yet hit puberty... and that's sorta annoying. Oh well! :-)

OMG, I so know what you mean! I got my period at, like, age 11, but without breasts (at a time when all my friends were sporting hormonally-induced large teen breasts), no one really knew. Sometimes I felt like, "What do I have to do to prove it--wave around a used tampon?" Ew, I know. But you catch my drift? wink.gif
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Vendetta
post Feb 27 2009, 12:29 PM
Post #2472


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I don't come in here for ages and I won't. Sometime on my "boob rehab" I thought I was wasting too much of my time thinking about it and posting about it. And it worked. When I come in here, it makes no sense anymore. I'm still struggling for my surgery but I won't spend my time anymore talking about how my lack of makes me feel whatever it does. It does and my time to solve it will come. In the meantime, I'm gonna waste my time on something useful. I'm single for good and so happy about it. Thanks for being there girls, you meant a lot to me. Cheers
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Vendetta
post Feb 27 2009, 12:28 PM
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I
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KeraBear
post Feb 27 2009, 11:38 AM
Post #2474


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QUOTE(karategrrl @ Feb 27 2009, 09:06 AM) *
KeraBear, thanks for posting. It gives me hope that you've gotten something out of this forum. If more young women can feel good about themselves, no matter what their breast size, that's a good thing.

Also, I hear ya about not wanting to knock our big-busted sistahs. As we've said before, I haaate people saying, "Oh, you don't want big ones because (fill in 10,000 reasons why). I never said I wanted big ones. I'd just love average ones! And comments like that DO knock naturally large-busted women.
.

Hooray! I am the hope for my generation! lol I know what you mean about wanting "average" ones though. Being short, with virtual no hips, my tiny booblets create the illusion that I am a 16-year-old who has not yet hit puberty... and that's sorta annoying. Oh well! :-)
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Persiflager
post Feb 27 2009, 09:25 AM
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*delurks*

I'm a larger-boobed Bustie and I lurk here for the super-zoomy vibes of positivity! The posts here make me feel gorgeous and strong in every way, not just in the bosomy area smile.gif

*relurks*


--------------------
“Logic is the art of going wrong with confidence.”
Morris Kline (mathematician, author) 1908-1992
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karategrrl
post Feb 27 2009, 09:06 AM
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KeraBear, thanks for posting. It gives me hope that you've gotten something out of this forum. If more young women can feel good about themselves, no matter what their breast size, that's a good thing.

Also, I hear ya about not wanting to knock our big-busted sistahs. As we've said before, I haaate people saying, "Oh, you don't want big ones because (fill in 10,000 reasons why). I never said I wanted big ones. I'd just love average ones! And comments like that DO knock naturally large-busted women.
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loonydaray
post Feb 27 2009, 12:02 AM
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hooollllyyyyy crappp. i didn't even know that was a cup size! kkk?? she must have to sleep sitting up... can't lay on her stomach and if she lays on her back she probably can't breathe! geez...why?? why????

however those comments were HILARIOUS
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KeraBear
post Feb 26 2009, 09:12 PM
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Hello small breasted sisters! I haven't really posted a lot, but i've been a regular reader of the thread. I posted a long time ago when i was feeling really down about my tiny breasts (or as i like to call them, my "booblets" ha ha). i am 16, short, with a boyish figure and for the longest time i had a bit of a complex about it. It seems like everywhere i go, i am surrounded by boobs, boobs, boobs! Even my 13-year-old lil sis is sporting a nice pair of C cups (ARGH!). It made me feel like less of a woman (especially during swimsuit season. yeeesh)

Anyways, as i said before, even though i have not posted a lot, i've been reading some of the conversations on here for quite some time now. I'd like to thank you regulars for helping to change my view of my booblets. i used to think "what can i do about my "problem"? or "Why can't i be "normal" like other girls my age"? But now i am starting to see that it's not what is wrong with me, but what is right. This is me and I am beautiful. If somebody thinks otherwise then they are not worth my time. I realize that i am still young and puberty may not be done with me yet (i got my first period at 15, so that may well be so), but in the meantime i am learning to love my body for what it is.

Here's an observation i've made. On some of the teen forums I go on, ocassionally (okay, frequently) a girl will make a post about how sad she is that she has small breasts, yadda, yadda, yadda and then other girls come to her aid saying things like "Be glad you don't have large breasts, they are ugly and saggy" Now i can see why they would say something like that to try to make her feel better about herself, but then how are the girls with big breasts supposed to feel. Can't we lift up our small breasted sisters without resorting to putting others down?

Anywho, keep up the good work!
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karategrrl
post Feb 26 2009, 03:08 PM
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Thought some of you might enjoy this article. It's worth reading just for the comments at the bottom.
(Warning: This is anti-implant!)
http://www.gigglesugar.com/2774217

Also an interesting poll about what people think of breast implants:
http://www.quibblo.com/quiz/5Kk8Wm/breast-...ants-hot-or-not

Interesting to note is that I found another "poll" an a site that was clearly a portal to breast augmentation doctors. It had the opposite results!
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anarch
post Feb 26 2009, 03:04 PM
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o/t, but I thought some of you might be interested in this article & discussion about breast cancer & breast augmentation

thanks angie_21 for the 007b site. Very interesting to see real boobs of all shapes and sizes and life stages.
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