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> Frustrated Singles
sassygrrl
post Sep 17 2006, 06:06 AM
Post #861


sassygrrl
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Posts: 2,021
From: Bumblefuck


This is an old professor who has still student crushie on me. Yet, I'm not a huge fan of the booty text message.
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crazyoldcatlady
post Sep 17 2006, 06:04 AM
Post #862


the moistiest
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Posts: 1,700
From: here. in my head.


oh yeah, god knows i love the texting for randomness (i have an ongoing text friendship with someone long distance whereby random rap lyrics are sent), but in the the context of a new romantic relationship? nah-uh. i don't want to be texted with "r u busy 2nite" and "lets go to dnr at 9, c u then" ESPECIALLY if we just started dating. it just irks me.
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sassygrrl
post Sep 17 2006, 01:53 AM
Post #863


sassygrrl
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Posts: 2,021
From: Bumblefuck




Watching Eddie right now. Forgot how funny Glorious was. Still need to get it on DVD, watching old VHS. I wanna get one of the DVDS on his site that are autographed, but I'm not sure if my player can play British dvds. Anyways. smile.gif

Sixel, we love you too honey. And, I'm with you on the money thing. My father I think always made more than my mother (I just realized how much like this year). It was never discussed in my family much. However, they bascially split everything 50/50, which I always thought was a good move. Funny enough. I dated a bloke after college. I remember that I wa living with my best friend. Anyways, they had the same name. We (bloke and I) had been out the night before getting on drink on. Hardcore. So, I woke up hungover. We lived right across the street from a bagel shop. I was throwing up, and my roomie said: Go get the girl so food. He got all pissy, and was like "Bagels are expensive!!" My roomie told him to fuck off, and get the hella out of our apartment. Needless to say, that was the end of our relationship. Besides, he was horrid in bed. Plus, he had an obsession with one of my gal pals (I was basically her Rhonda). He would always be like: "I wonder what T is doing??" Finally, roomie was like, "Asshole, you're not dating T, you're dating Sassy!!" Heh.

I agree with silly text messages. My old college professor and I have an ongoing text relationship ...going on.
It's nice to get silly texts from him, b/c we rarely ever see eachother.
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sixelacat
post Sep 17 2006, 01:26 AM
Post #864


Creating demon-radical feminist hybrids since 1974
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Posts: 690
From: Savoir Faire is Everywhere!


I love you guys!

stargazer, it's true, I am a bit hard on myself sometimes. I don't compare myself to my friends or others my age, because they aren't me, but I look at my potential and sometimes get frustrated because I haven't done near as much as I think I could have had everything gone perfectly in my life. Yeah, no unreasonable expectations there! It's funny, usually my advice to others who are having trouble finding suitable partners is to see if they are actually doing what makes them happy, because then they are more likely to interact with people who have similar value systems. Thank you for reminding me to listen to my own advice!!!!

Of course, knowing all that doesn't make me any less horny right now! Ah, well.....

sassy, the money thing can get weird! I think a large part of it seems to be how money affected the parental dynamic (if one parent earned more, etc.). I know my mom has pretty much supported my dad most of my life, and I have more respect for someone that can earn their own money and has respect for earned money in general....

And I love text messaging as a unique form of communication, not as a replacement for any other kind. I still call, write letters, email, and IM. Yet it is still so much fun to send someone a text in the middle of the day with some amusing thought you just had, or to receive same. It can enhance communication, as long as it's not used to replace other forms (IMHO). To me they are all varying degrees....


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Are you thinking what I'm thinking?!
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sassygrrl
post Sep 17 2006, 01:00 AM
Post #865


sassygrrl
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Posts: 2,021
From: Bumblefuck


Stargazer, excellent post. Again, thank you for PM.

Been thinking seriously about the money issue with couples. I am amazed right now with McCrush and I. We've gone out twice. Once I paid (I asked him), and the next he did. I am truely amazed. My last ex bitched and moaned if I even looked at a DVD, and would gasp in horror: "I'm NOT buying you that!!" Yet, he would then go buy random power tool that he didn't need. Sad thing is, he made at least three times more than me, and still lived with parental units at 29. Seriously fucked in the head. Anyways, they always say couples fight about three things: kids, sex, and money. Possibility that maybe all three have to do with power perhaps??
It's always been a slippery slope with me. Tomorrow shall be interesting, as we're actually going on shopping date to Best Buy. I'll tell all how it goes. I need tunes and new DVDs.

Had a long talk with best friend (who I have known since high school) about random high school exie popping up. He knew us both obviously. His exact words: "Fuck baby! If he didn't profess his love then or 5 years ago now when you had random date, he never will. Besides, he's become massive holy roller, and time has not been well to him. Screw him. And move on...." Best friend was drunk when saying this, but his advice has always rang true. It's not that I haven't moved on, just very bizzare. Yet, boy left me for massive slut who probably has HIV (infact, if I recall I gave her a HIV test in senior will) during my junior year. Ahem.

I only IM those who I do not call on a regular basis. Even then though, it's so impersonal as said to a phone call. And call me romantic and old-fashion, but I really REALLY miss letter writing. I know email is of fashion and quicker nowadays, but getting love letters is so nice compared to like Mastercard bill. I still send funny little cards to friends and family.

Ah, what to wear tomorrow on big date?? I did just buy new pair of cute jeans at Old Navy. Perhaps those.


Sixel, I agree with star on this advice. smile.gif

Ugh, crawling back into bed. Can't stop thinking about how insanely good Illusionist was, which is why I'm up at like 3 a.m. Bleh. Go. See. It.


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bella coola
post Sep 16 2006, 10:51 PM
Post #866


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Way to put it down, stargazer! The best lovers are the ones that don't think of their performance, they're too busy savoring every moment of it. It's the only way to live life.

And I agree: IM does not equal savoring life
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stargazer
post Sep 16 2006, 09:20 PM
Post #867


brown delicious
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the whole discovery process is akin to intimacy...there is alot to reveal and take in from your partner...why do you think sex and money is such a problem for couples/partners? lack of communication. there can be freedom and great sex with open communication. oh, and it helps not to have any expectations. you are setting yourself up for disappointment by placing requirements/expectations in the sex department.

i've had some insecure lovers. and they were the least exciting for me in bed. i eventually become bored. and they were both the most experimental in bed. but, after awhile, it is too contrived and unnatural for me. i definitely like sex to be more organic. i get off on the simple things...like the touch of his skin, the sounds that happen, the noise of the bed...when lovers rush during sex...i don't think they appreciate the person in front of them...they come off pretty selfish...and think they are great lovers just 'cause they get off...while i'm laying there thinking, "good for you." it's almost like a child discovering their genitals for the first time...like, "look what i did." yeah, this attitude tells me they are just as childish in a relationship.

i HATE text messaging and IMing. call me, dude. it's like a bad tease. cold, impersonal, blah, i hate it. makes me think the person has difficulties emotionally connecting.

sassygrrl~life is all about opportunities. and pooh on the guy who didn't have the balls to tell you he liked/loved you. his loss. i had a male friend who dropped off the face of the earth, saw him at my high school reunion, only find out he liked me....and i'm like," why didn't you tell me this before? now, we'll never know what would've happened?" (i was with my ex at the time)

sixelacat~don't be so hard on yourself. i've been punishing myself by thinking why i'm not in similar places as some of my friends. but, life is not a race to be won, but to be experienced and enjoyed. i think you are onto something though. i'm sure if you keep doing the things you like and enjoy, then you will meet someone with similar interests and to your liking.


--------------------
"I'm not impressed easily. Wow! A blue car!"-Homer Simpson
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sassygrrl
post Sep 15 2006, 04:55 PM
Post #868


sassygrrl
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Posts: 2,021
From: Bumblefuck


I HATE text messaging.... It does lead to misunderstanding.. bleh.

There's a crushie who is constantly texting me, and he's not on my phone provider, so I'm paying for it. Now, we get along fine with IM and email, but...

GB, good that you're taking it slow with Nurse boy. I'm trying to do the same with McCrush, but we're making dinner this weekend. And I'm insanely honry this weekend due to PMS. I'm going to try not to be a slut...

Had a dream about old ex from high school. Weird. I guess he could contact me if he wants right?? Lusting over exs is just weird..and fucked up.. had a bunch of dreams about a few of them lately. Really pissing me off.

Pervy High... brings back memories... heh... smile.gif Skipping 5th period to go make out with boys...ha.

Need wine.


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emtee
post Sep 15 2006, 04:28 PM
Post #869


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 174
From: The Great White North


See now, I'm the opposite. My type is, and has always been, lanky, scrawny and over-sensitive. And usually gay.
Perhaps shaking things up would do me no harm, but big guys scare me. It's a holdover from my first aggressive and psychotic dating experience.

And I HATE text messaging.
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crazyoldcatlady
post Sep 15 2006, 04:05 PM
Post #870


the moistiest
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Posts: 1,700
From: here. in my head.


(i would so do a one night stand were it not for my deathly fear pregnancy and std's. god knows i'd even have that shit wrapped. oh, snap, should i put this in the confessions thread?smile.gif )

Anyway, i wanted to throw something out there, because i find this particularly annoying. Potential dates etc. have been too heavily reliant on text messaging to get in contact with me. i have a lot of issues with this:

-don't text me a novel. callllll.
-i have to pay for incoming texts.
-comes off as lazy/ball-less
-some texts have gone awry, leading to misunderstandings.

now, i'm torn, because god knows i'm fucking addicting to email and AIM. but texting? i can't get into it. maybe because i've never had a crackberry?
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katiebelle2882
post Sep 15 2006, 12:15 PM
Post #871


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 647
From: NYC


yeah i think its that attitude that makes them so much more attractive to us. i rather get one of them in bed then some skinny emo guy who wants to be "sensitive" to my needs. not sure why that is hmmmmmmm


--------------------
“There's something about the Irish that is remarkable.”-François de la Rochefoucauld
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greenbean
post Sep 15 2006, 11:59 AM
Post #872


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 954


Quick draw mcgraws! Pervert High! stargazer, six, you had me laughing there!

Actually, Katie, the Alphas I've been with were NOT extremely good looking, just real cocky and hold that "you want me" attitude. And I agree that real good-looking peeps usually are lazy in bed. I read somewhere that Marilyn Monroe was gawd-awful.

I'm gonna keep taking it slow with Nurse Boy and hope that it pays off. If it doesnt then I'll go with Kal's and Pepper's idea with the hints. (Hmmmm,,, spanking, hairpulling, y'll are making me drool here:P)



--------------------
I thank God I was raised Catholic, so sex will always be dirty.--John Waters
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pepper
post Sep 15 2006, 09:02 AM
Post #873







oh kal, you're just reminding me of how many girlfriends i have pervertized. in highschool i gave them all verbal lessons on performing oral sex (and got a couple of 'thank yous' from some of their boyfriends along with lecherous looks. damn, that was weird. sometimes it pays to be mysterious and pretend like you learned it all on your own eh? highschool girls. hmph.) and my neighbour and i over the last couple of years would just meet up for tea and dish the dirt about our exploits. she was dating a sweet gentle buddhist but over the course of a few months of me telling her all the horrible, nasty, rotten, delicious things this bad, bad man was doing to me she got all curious and hinty hinted her way into some hairpulling, scratchy-bitey-spanky goodness with her squishy mister.
ah, those were the days.
and now i am lusting after ex's all over the planet and confused all to hell about the not-serious/i love you crushie. wtf. colour me frustruated. i know, i know, i'm still gettin' some but meh, i might be less frustrated if i wasn't. ?
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katiebelle2882
post Sep 15 2006, 08:40 AM
Post #874


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 647
From: NYC


Kal,

I am sure your friend who gets laid so easily is extremely goodlooking and charming. I kind of have a theory (that has sort of been proven over the years by talking to both sexes) that the most attractive people are the most shite in bed. Why? Because they know they are hot and they think the person should just be happy they are able to have sex with them. Therefore, they dont try at all in bed.

In any case, yes i think balance is important, however, I still maintain that the hottest sex for moi has been F-buddies or one night stands. There was this All American rubgy player once...mmmmmmmmm.


ok i am done reminiscing. I think its cool that it takes all kinds in this world. And while i am 24 I, like your friend Kal, just need to do my own thing for awhile. When i find someone I love love love, I'll be willing to settle for less then stellar sex, bc I have kinda resigned myself to the fact that I will have to settle. Which sucks, but oh well.


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“There's something about the Irish that is remarkable.”-François de la Rochefoucauld
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sixelacat
post Sep 15 2006, 03:22 AM
Post #875


Creating demon-radical feminist hybrids since 1974
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Posts: 690
From: Savoir Faire is Everywhere!


Hi, fellow frustratees! I started to post in Crush, but realized this thread was more, um, accurate for me right now. The thing is, I think I'm more frustrated with myself than anything else. The whole thing with cellgrrl just started striking me as so....high school. (Okay, it would have to be Pervert High, but still). She said but then I heard and then she passed me a note (text) and then.....fuck it. I'd still rather be single than with anyone I've ever met so far, but then start wondering why I'm not meeting more interesting people. Then I figure it's because I'm not doing the things I really want to do (don't have the career I want yet, live in the city I want yet, etc.). I feel so behind right now, like anybody I would like to be with is already doing all the things they want to be doing so we're in totally different circles. I hope that makes sense.

On the courtship note, I personally am extremely adverse to sentimentality, but am a die-hard Romantic. Cards and flowers and whatnot because you are "supposed" to do that as part of some prescribed ritual seems meaningless. Romance for me takes time, because I have to have the "getting to know you" process Kal is talking about. Not that I don't believe it can happen right off the bat, it's just extremely unlikely (but hey, anything's possible).


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Kalevra
post Sep 15 2006, 02:43 AM
Post #876


Hardcore BUSTie
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Posts: 129


Ok then, ....we have

Katie
Greenbean
Sassy..

Now with all due respect, these girls like the wham, bam, thank you Ma'am approach from the boys smile.gif You know what freaks me out about this....? Meeting you for real now would be the most interesting thing EVER. heee heeee
Seriously, that is cool that you look for the 'Alpha' males, but what you say is 100% correct. You need a balance. I have 2 buddies who are proper Alpha's, the one guy holds a record here of 7 days, 7 different girls, two of them on the same day....he NEVER fails to get laid. One of them is now in a serious relationship, he has found his longterm desire.....and he is battling. He needs to sow more oats. I also heard via two of his conquests that he was shit in the sack...

We also have:....
Stargazer
Pepper

Yep, we have found some common ground here..... as I said before it is a DISCOVERY, in one previous relationship, it was open enough that we could communicate our desires, but not always directly, the subtle hints were like a little game....fun! I found out this way, that spanking, a bit of roughness and biting (not tearing chunks but nipping) were things she liked.....not all the time, but occasionally...and it went on like that......it became a great part of our relationship....and surprisingly carnal....
I communicated to her that I sometimes need a 'quickie', or something dangerous, where we could get caught....we had a LOT of fun with that.....restaurant washrooms, cars.....

Damn, I am frustrating myself again...

I like it here.

*blows kisses for the girlies*



--------------------
I like to keep a bottle of drink handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy - W.C. Fields
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sassygrrl
post Sep 14 2006, 07:15 PM
Post #877


sassygrrl
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Posts: 2,021
From: Bumblefuck


Just got off a long IM session with one of my old high school friends who I haven't seen in damn... don't know like 13 years.

Anyways was bitching and moannig about today's crap day and crap job.
And we were talking about boys. He told me that one of my old high school exs saw a pic of me recently, and started to cry. Told me that he told her he was in love with me.

I saw this bloke like 5 years ago (he found me via my high school friend) and had lunch. I hadn't seen him in over 5 years, and he opens up his mouth with "I just got divorced." He had moved home to our hometown. That's fine if you're 18, but living in my hometown after the age of 18 (unless you want to settle down and have a family) is whack. He made me justify why I was living in Atlanta (at the time it was the place to be, like I said this was 5 years ago). Anyways, he's had turned amazing religious freak on me.

Anyways, it makes sad he almost cried over me. Yet he has G's email, and she knows my email. Weird though. He was a good boyfriend, but he broke up with me to date some whore (in high school).

Do men smell a phermone on us or something? Exs are popping up out of the woodwork. Bleh.

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sassygrrl
post Sep 14 2006, 04:58 PM
Post #878


sassygrrl
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Posts: 2,021
From: Bumblefuck


do they exist greenbean? cause if they do we need to find those boys cause i am totally with you on that. that is EXACTLY what i need too. damn!

Damn, was trying to insert quote there.

I'm with both of you gals.

A few of my one night stands have turned into full on relationships. Howver, I went thru a fuck buddy stage (my last great fuck buddy who is also a close friend --long story... just got married. So we still have a fliration thing going on, but we now know we'll never screw again) in college and a little after, but I'm over it now. I'm not saying they're fun, b/c they were. But, it just left me... empty. Probably filling the void for something else I was missing. I don't know.

Kal, where you at baby?

So glad I'm stoked about crush boy. But, also scared. He just seems almost too good to be true. Don't want to get burned again.


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pepper
post Sep 14 2006, 04:29 PM
Post #879







i can't sleep around. one night stands are totally off the book with me, always have been, even more so now that i'm a momma and need to be careful.
i have found that if it's good the first time, it will be mindbendingly great the fifth time. and i'm into kinky shit, can't just spring that on a fella all at once!
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stargazer
post Sep 14 2006, 02:01 PM
Post #880


brown delicious
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kal, man, i love you! it is so great to have you in the lounge. smile.gif

i am all about the discovery as well. i like to take my time with sex. i consider myself to be a patient and attentive lover. i don't like the quick draw mcgraws. stamina is a big thing. everyone is different i guess...
if i like someone, then i can be pretty open with a partner and accepting...i definitely like the whole process...even the whole seduction scene, which includes flirting....

sassygrrl, good luck with everything!



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"I'm not impressed easily. Wow! A blue car!"-Homer Simpson
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